New Year's performance for the new year at school. Merry New Year's fairy tale scenes, plays, performances, performances for the New Year
New Year's Eve at your school the game will pass"Club of Cheerful and Resourceful"? The audience and the jury will enjoy mini-scenes based on fairy tales, cartoons, issues of the comic magazine "Yeralash" and New Year's jokes for KVN at school, which play on various situations in the classroom.
To put such miniatures, you do not have to learn the texts by heart, the main thing is to convey the essence of what this or that character says.
How to arrange KVN at school for the New Year?
Baba Yaga and her daughter participate in the first school scene of the New Year's KVN. For this production, you will need original props - costumes and wigs for fairy-tale characters.
The girl cries and Baba Yaga asks her what happened. The daughter replies that she wants to play the role of the Snow Maiden at the New Year's party, but she was told that she was not beautiful enough for this.
– Or maybe the role of the Snow Queen will suit you? Baba Yaga asks.
“Think about it yourself: her outfit is several kilograms of icicles, and her crown is made of a broken mirror. This is a direct threat to my health!
“Well, we’ll make a Snow Maiden out of you,” Baba Yaga agrees. First things first, Goblin will build you a suitable hairstyle. Keep in mind that he works with natural materials - driftwood and fir cones, instead of varnish - resin.
Daughter of Baba Yaga:
– Here is this deal! But I also matching outfit needed.
Baba Yaga:
- It will be for you, daughter, everything in the first category: Cinderella's dress, crystal shoes ...
Daughter:
- What are you, mother, this is the century before last! I need a kill kit: Leather Jacket, ripped jeans, a bandana with rhinestones and Adidas sneakers.
Baba Yaga:
- All right, daughter! Everything will be first class!
I will conjure new clothes
For a daughter's party.
Cracks, pex, fex!…
At the end of this scene at the school KVN about Baba Yaga, her daughter appears before the audience in a new outfit and declares:
- What can I say, you can see for yourself: beauty is a terrible force!
What other New Year's jokes are suitable for KVN at school?
Your performance in various competitions, whether it be "Greetings", "Homework" or "Captains Competition", will be diversified with comic skits for the school KVN - for example, such:
- This year, for the first time, my parents let me go to celebrate the New Year with friends. But after my mom found a shopping list for the holiday table in my jeans pocket, for some reason, she and dad decided to join us.
- There is a sign in our class that if you lean out the window on New Year's Eve and ... learn all the tickets, you will definitely pass the exam.
- A good half of Russian teachers write comments in a diary, and the evil half also calls their parents to school on the eve of the holiday.
- A school is a place where teachers demand from students knowledge in all subjects, while they themselves know only one.
- Even in kindergarten, we were sentenced to 11 years of school regime with the confiscation of toys.
Funny miniatures for KVN for the 2019 New Year can be put with the participation of Santa Claus and the Snow Maiden. Once they called the guys to visit and began to ask them questions based on the materials of the school curriculum.
***
Father Frost:
- What are dense forests?
Pupil:
- These are forests in which it is good to doze off!
***
Snow Maiden:
Who can name five wild animals?
The student raises his hand.
- A lion, a lioness and ... three lion cubs.
***
A letter came to the mail from the boy to Santa Claus:
- Grandfather Frost, send me a warm hat, mittens and socks for the New Year.
The postal workers took pity on the boy and bought him mittens and socks, but there was not enough money for a cap: you know that salaries at the post office are small. The answer comes from the boy:
- Thank you, Grandfather Frost, for mittens and socks, and my hat, it seems, was stolen by the evil aunts at the post office.
***
The boy writes a letter to Santa Claus:
"Hello Dedushka Moroz! The Chinese crackers you sent me last time I got them and I really liked them. For this New Year, I would like to ask you to give me two fingers to right hand and an eye!"
***
On New Year's Eve, Pinocchio comes up to Papa Carlo and asks to give him a toy animal. Papa Carlo thought and thought and made a toy. He gave it to Pinocchio and hears that he is crying.
- What's happened? asks Papa Carlo.
- I just wanted a toy - a dog or a cat, - Pinocchio answers, - and this toothy beaver looks at me somehow strangely!
Other jokes for the New Year's school KVN
***
- Now you will hear phrases that you will not hear on New Year's Eve ...
"Mom, dad, stay at home, let's spend the New Year together"; "Girls, go, drink what you want and how much you want, and we'll sit here together with my father."
***
Santa Claus does not exist. He lives to the fullest.
***
An emergency at school: at the celebration of the New Year, a boy dressed as a cucumber was bitten by a fizruk.
***
Seven-year-old Petya almost believed in Santa Claus, but dad laughed, and his beard fell off.
***
Elite boy kindergarten learning a New Year's rhyme:
- Hello, Santa Claus, cotton beard!
Give the fifth BMW X for the New Year!
***
A children's search engine Vugl was presented at a Tambov school for the New Year. If you want to know a lot - Woogl!
On New Year's Eve, you can also play skits for KVN, which take place at school in the classroom.
***
At school, children write an essay on the topic “What would I ask Santa Claus for the New Year?”
Vovochka:
- Dear Santa Claus! Make it so that we are not forced to write these stupid essays anymore!
***
At the math exam, the teacher carefully observes the students and from time to time kicks out of the class those who found cheat sheets.
The principal looks into the classroom.
- How is the exam going? I think there are a lot of cheaters here!
Teacher:
- No, the lovers have already gone home. Only professionals are left here.
***
Teacher:
- Petrov, why do you look at your watch every minute?
Petrov:
“Because I'm terribly worried that a stupid call would interrupt this amazingly interesting lesson at a completely inopportune time.
***
Teacher:
- Children, draw a square with a side of twelve centimeters!
Petrov:
- Marya Ivanovna, what kind of square is this - with one side ?!
***
Teacher:
- You, Sidorov, interesting essay but why isn't it finished?
Sidorov:
“Because my father was urgently called to work!”
***
Teacher:
– And now I will prove to you the Pythagorean theorem.
Peter from the back:
- Is it worth it, Ivan Ivanovich? We do believe you!
***
Teacher:
Why is European time ahead of American time?
Petushkov holds out his hand:
Because America was discovered later!
***
The teacher says to the student:
- Let your grandfather come to school tomorrow!
Do you mean father?
- No, let your grandfather come. I want to show him what blunders his son makes in your homework.
The action of the last scene of the New Year's KVN takes place at a school break.
Two high school students are talking:
“You know, just thinking about him makes my heart pound, my hands shake, my legs give way, I can’t even speak.
- And what is his name?
- USE!
For these smaller productions, you don't need elaborate sets. For example, if a scene is being played out in the classroom, it is enough to hang up the blackboard and place the desk. If the action takes place at a break, a corridor window is suitable as a decoration.
Help the guys who take part in the productions to show their acting talents - and jokes for KVN at school for the New Year 2019 will not let your viewers get bored!
Do you want to arrange a fun and interesting New Year's party for your children? Consider our scenarios. New Year 2019 is coming very soon and to make it easier for you to prepare for it, we have prepared for you children's New Year's scenarios 2019 - for matinees and school evenings. Meet the New Year 2019 with fun!
Matinee script for organizing a New Year's meeting at school in oriental style with wonders and adventures. Characters: schoolgirl Diana, her friend Latona, Scheherazade, Jafar, Jean, Aladdin, Sinbad. What is needed for the organization: scenery, masquerade costumes, musical accompaniment, a decorated Christmas tree, a sweet table.
The script is written for new year holiday at the school matinee. An interesting journey to the era of Peter the Great, the story of the creation of the New Year. Characters: two presenters, Peter the Great, a reciter of poems, a dance group. What is necessary for the organization: serpentine, confetti, Christmas tree, fancy dress and masks, music and lyrics.
Scenario of New Year's celebration for schoolchildren. Active fun game. Characters: Crane, Bear, guys - carolers. What is needed for the organization: costumes for characters, scenery, musical accompaniment, covered festive table.
Unusual school script New Years celebrations with interesting divination and predictions. Actors: Snow Maiden, Vendma-Megerochka, Witch Auda, Witch Irgola, three Snowmen, Snowflakes and Santa Claus. What is needed for the organization: New Year's attributes and costumes, musical accompaniment, sweets and sweets, props for scenes.
The script is designed for children school age. The history of the emergence of Christmas with songs, round dances and children's performances. Characters: host, scientist cat, Joulupukki, Scrooge McDuck. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, props, a New Year tree, skits prepared in advance by the guys, hall decoration, masquerade costumes.
Children's script New Year's party. Presentation for schoolchildren. Acquaintance with the legendary hero of the fabulous Sherwood Forest, Robin Hood. Interesting tasks and fun contests. Characters: Robin Hood and two presenters. What is needed for the organization: sweets and sweets, a decorated Christmas tree, character costumes, a bow with arrows.
New Year's party for children is held in the school assembly hall. Scenario for schoolchildren. Characters: presenter, Zimushka - winter, Squirrel, Wolf, Fox, Hare, Snow Maiden, Santa Claus, Snowflakes, guys - readers of poems and montages. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, hall decoration, costumes for the participants in the skits, prizes for the winners.
New Year's Eve Celebration New Year's Eve performance for children in high school. Carrying out children's competitions and games. Characters: Pierrot, Santa Claus, Jester, Capricious Star, Button. What is needed for the organization: a sweet table, hall decoration, costumes of heroes, gifts for participants, a chest, a home-made podium, music.
The scenario of the New Year's holiday at school for children studying at school. A performance for children with their favorite fairy-tale characters, turning into dancing and round dances. Characters: Snow Maiden, Santa Claus, Hare, Fox, Mouse, Dog, Tiger cub. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, decorations, masquerade costumes, sweet gifts, a stage.
New Year's performance for high school students. Scenario of meeting the New Year in a circle of friends or employees. Conducting fun contests, interesting quizzes, funny congratulations and toasts. Characters: Optimist, Pessimist. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, character costumes, prizes for winners, a festive table, music.
A dynamic festive scenario was developed for holding a New Year's KVN between guests according to all the rules of this famous game. Lots of jokes and fun for all participants of the holiday. Actors: presenter, five teams of players. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, cardboard numbers, prizes for the winners, a festive table.
New Year celebration script designed for children preschool age. New Year's party for the little ones. Conducting fun games and competitions for kids and their parents. Characters: Parsley, Harlequin, Santa Claus, Snow Maiden. What is needed for the organization: a festive table, masquerade costumes, sweet gifts.
Scenario New Year's party for kindergarten. Festive performance for children. original ideas for costumes of fairy-tale characters: Harlequin, Petrushka, The Snow Queen, Joyful old women, Dinka-ice. Characters: Children. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, character costumes, gifts for participants.
Holiday for friends. Competitive New Year's program with prizes and gifts, without vulgarity and bad jokes. Characters: presenter, Santa Claus and Snegurochka. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, gifts for the winners, a banquet table, costumes for program participants.
Happy New Year's scenario for adults and children. An original meeting of the New Year in nature for the whole family with entertainment events: contests and games. Characters: children and their parents. What is needed for the organization: New Year's melodies, decorated Christmas tree, masquerade costumes, sweet prizes, invitation cards, table, chairs, firewood.
A universal scenario for a fun family celebration of the New Year 2019. A scenario for a large company of adults and children. Family competitions and fun quizzes. Characters: parents and their children. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, a sweet table, hall decoration, character costumes, prizes for the winners.
New Year's staging of New Year's celebration with fairy tale characters. Script for the whole family. Entertainment events are designed for a large company. Characters: Buffoons, Santa Claus, Winter, Baba Yaga. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, sweet gifts, prizes for the winners of competitions.
Scenario of a festive party for the New Year in the style of the 80s. Performance for adults and children. Incendiary dances until you drop, funny contests and quizzes. Characters: presenter, Santa Claus. What is needed for the organization: dance melodies, a decorated Christmas tree, character costumes, gifts for participants, a banquet table, props.
The script of the festive morning for preschoolers. A playful and funny scene for children. Comic riddles, funny games, interesting contests, driving round dances and singing New Year's songs. Characters: Buffoon, Baba Yaga, Snow Maiden, Santa Claus. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, sweet prizes, costumes for characters, scenery.
Scenario meeting New Year 2019 for children in elementary grades. Matinee for schoolchildren with fairy-tale characters of their favorite cartoons. Actors: Ivanushka the Fool, Koschey the Immortal, Baba Yaga, Snow White, gnomes, Nightingale the Robber, Little Red Riding Hood. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, hall decoration, masquerade costumes, sweet gifts.
Scenario for the meeting of the New Year in the lower grades. New Year's celebration for schoolchildren. Actors: Snow Maiden, Santa Claus, Fairy, Baba Yaga, Little Red Riding Hood, Ivanushka the Fool, Nightingale the Robber, Koschei the Immortal, Seven Dwarfs, Old Man Hottabych, Snow White. What is needed for the organization: New Year's melodies, a decorated Christmas tree, prizes for the winners, a sweet table, decorations, New Year's paraphernalia.
The New Year's scenario was developed for a matinee at school. Fun show for kids. dramatization educational process. Characters: teacher, troupe of students, support group. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, character costumes, gifts for participants, chairs to simulate a class, a wall calendar.
The scenario is designed for holding a matinee at school. Presentation for children. Interesting plot, light humor, good ending. Characters: a group of children, "brothers". What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, a smartly decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, fancy dress, sweets and sweets, prizes for the winners.
We offer a version of a children's New Year's holiday with Santa Claus and the Snow Maiden, the program includes riddles, active contests, songs and dance entertainment.
Scenario New Year's holiday for children of different ages- universal, exciting and very cheerful, it is easy to organize and conduct in any team, especially since the musical accompaniment is attached (thanks to the author!)
Scenario of the New Year's holiday
To the soundtrack, the Snow Maiden enters the hall, examines beautiful Christmas tree, a bright hall and draws attention to children.
Snow Maiden:
Hello!
Happy Holidays my little friends!
You recognized me? Remember who I am
Children (in chorus): Snow Maiden!
Snow Maiden: That's right, Snow Maiden!
And since I came to the kids,
So, the holiday is in the yard!
Everyone celebrates the New Year
They lead a round dance,
Everyone is waiting for gifts and miracles.
Well, that's how it will be today!
Children's New Year's noise maker "So as not to freeze ..."
Now let's dive into the New Year's fairy tale,
But first, let's make some noise and warm up!
So that we do not freeze in the evil frost -
Let's hold on to our noses! (Snow Maiden shows)
So that there is no trouble with the doctors -
Rubbing your frozen cheeks like this! (shows)
So that the hands do not freeze - clap! (claps hands)
And now let's warm our feet and stomp (shows)
And we'll tickle the neighbor a little (The Snow Maiden affectionately tickles several guys)
And, of course, let's laugh together! (ha ha ha)
And now, since you are warm, I have a question:
Who will add fun to everyone?
Children (in chorus): Santa Claus!
Snow Maiden: Yes, we really need Santa Claus,
Let's call him all together, together: "Santa Claus!"
Children (in chorus): Santa Claus!
(to download - click the file)
Under the song "Well, of course, Santa Claus," Santa Claus himself comes out. He greets everyone, inspects the Christmas tree, throws snowballs, throws serpentine, slams the firecracker, etc. (Then the Snow Maiden and Santa Claus lead the program together)
Father Frost: I am glad to see my grandchildren again,
After all, we are not celebrating the New Year for the first time,
And when they meet, what do they say to a friend?
Nice, simple word "hello"!
Guys, where is my fidget Snow Maiden? Here she was, come on!?
(Snow Maiden hides behind Santa Claus and says now from the left, now from the right: "I am here").
Father Frost: Oh, the Snow Maiden is a mischievous girl, fooled around? Enough!
All the guys in the hall are waiting for gifts, congratulations!
Although, probably, the girls and boys here
The same as you, pranksters and rascals?
Snow Maiden: Grandpa, is this how the holiday begins? The guys haven’t seen you for a whole year, they were waiting for a meeting, and you declare to them right away that they, most likely, somehow behave in a wrong way ..
Father Frost: Yes, I kindly scolded only a little, well, well, I'll ask them themselves. The children are beautiful, you must be terrible little rascals?
(to download - click the file)
Snow Maiden: Grandpa, everyone knows that you are a kind wizard.
Father Frost: Yes. And I'll tell you honestly: doing good miracles and making all sorts of transformations is so interesting.
Snow Maiden: But is it so complicated - magic?
Father Frost: Nothing like this. Let's try to turn into an animal or a bird.
Snow Maiden: Oh, how are you, grandpa?
Father Frost: Very simple. The kids just need to be more careful. I will pronounce magic words, i.e. sing a song, and you guys, following the Snow Maiden and me, will repeat the magical movements. And so you turn into an animal or a bird. Clear?
Active game "Transformation No. 1 - Zoo"
(the smallest children are selected. They walk in a circle one after another and repeat the movements of D.M. and Snegurka to the tune of the song “about the grasshopper”)
(to download - click the file)
Here in the snowy winter, thicket of the forest Thicket of the forest, gray creeps ...Wolf
Imagine, imagine a forest thicket
Imagine, imagine a gray wolf stalking
In Australia, far away, on a low hill. On a low hill, so galloping ... kangaroo
Imagine, imagine - on a low hill
Imagine, imagine - this is how a kangaroo jumps
Under the gray foam, under the blue water Under the blue water, so it swims ... Dolphin
Imagine, imagine - under the blue water
Imagine, imagine - this is how a dolphin swims
From the balcony to the gazebo, and from the lantern to the branch And from the lantern to the branch flies ...Sparrow
Imagine, imagine - and from the lantern to the branch
Imagine, imagine - a sparrow flies
Dancing at the lair and not sparing his feet And not sparing his feet so stomping ... bear
Imagine, imagine - and not sparing your feet
Imagine, imagine - this is how the bear stomps
Father Frost: And now we can do some magic more difficult.
(other participants are selected from the kids)
Active game "Transformation No. 2 - Orchestra"
(a song is sung, and the children, together with D.M. and Snegurka, depict a game on musical instruments- trumpet, violin and drum).
(to download - click the file)
Father Frost: Also, in order for a wizard to perform all sorts of transformations, you need to be a little imaginative.
Snow Maiden: Why, grandfather, will they still start teasing - “I imagined my tail was tucked in”?
Father Frost: I'm talking about those people who can imagine, ie. imagine anything. Listen to my story and imagine. Only first we need to choose assistants - 7 people. and an additional 4-6 people. for the role of snowflakes.
(preferably, adult spectators are selected for the roles: Bees, Winnie the Pooh, the wolf and the hare, Cheburashka and Crocodile Gena, Cat Leopold and snowflakes. All characters wear masks and everyone comes out to their own soundtrack, instead of a barrel of honey, a balloon ).
Children's Christmas story- Impromptu "Imagined"
There lived a Snow Maiden. And she went to celebrate the New Year. The weather was wonderful. Light snowflakes swirled in the air. And then the Snow Maiden hears a buzzing. - This is probably someone fly - thought the Snow Maiden. Indeed, this is a bee named Maya flying and holding a barrel of honey in its paws. A bee flies up to the Snow Maiden, gives her a barrel of honey and says: “Treat, Snow Maiden, your friends.” And she flew away. As soon as she flew away, the Snow Maiden hears someone waddling stomping and groaning: “Wow, wow, wow.” And this is Winnie the Pooh. Winnie the Pooh came up to the Snow Maiden and said: "Treat me with a honeycomb, Snow Maiden." As soon as he said this, suddenly a hare runs, followed by a hooligan wolf and shouts: “Well, hare, wait a minute!” A hare with a wolf ran up, they also want honey. And then the sound of wheels - tu-tu. A blue wagon rolls, and on it ... Cheburashka and Gena the crocodile, and they say: "Leave us some honey too." Then there was a noise and uproar, everyone was shouting: "Me, me, me." The Snow Maiden was at a loss that she almost dropped a barrel of honey from her hands. It’s good that at that time a kind cat in slippers and a bow around his neck came up and said: “Guys, let's live together!” And then divide the honey equally among all. The animals ate sweet honey and clapped their hands for joy. Like this!
Dance under the sash
Father Frost: Yes, you are notable imaginations, I want to see what kind of dancers you are.
(Guys exit) A dance is announced under my sash. You need to go back and forth under the sash to the music, dancing. The sash will gradually fall lower and lower, but you cannot touch it.
(Participants for the dance competition or everyone is selected, as well as assistants from among the adults who will hold the sash. The originality of the dance is assessed).
Father Frost: And what a beautiful Christmas tree you have. It is immediately clear that they were preparing for the New Year's Eve. Did you decorate the tree yourself? Do you know what to dress up? I'll check now. I will offer different decorations, and you turn on your imagination, but be careful, tell me in response, if they decorate the Christmas tree, then “yes”, and if they do not decorate, then “no”
How do we decorate a Christmas tree, we all know for sure
And what is possible and what is not - we will immediately guess:
Balls, beads and toys? (Yes)
Pies, compote and dryers? (Not)
Serpentine and tinsel? (Yes)
Skates, skis and play? (Not)
A colorful garland? (Yes)
And the snowflakes are light? (Yes)
Snow Maiden: And now Grandfather Frost will sing a song about a Christmas tree, only I need your help. You need to sing the following words in the chorus: “Like, like the Christmas tree is beautiful!” Let's rehearse.
(everyone sings at the same tempo)
The song "Christmas tree - beauty"
(recorded version with the vocals of Father Frost and a refrain for the chorus with the children)
Lyrics
In the center of the hall, a beauty grew up miraculously
Well, tell me, guys, do you like the Christmas tree? - 2 times
Chorus (all together):
Like, like Christmas tree - beauty - 2 times
There are so many colorful tinsel on its shaggy branches
Bell carved, colorful balls - 2 times
Chorus .
In a warm room, the snow does not melt, this is what happens on New Year's Eve
And the guys are leading a round dance in the hall near the Christmas tree - 2 times
Father Frost : We will continue the holiday, we will play with you. And for this you need to create two teams - a team of D.M. and the Snow Maiden team of 10 people. in each and two adults in each team for safety net.
→ New Year >" url="http://scenario/index1.php?raz=2&prazd=1231&page=1">14.11.2018 | We looked at the script 1750 Human
(music at the beginning. The sound of a blizzard)
D.M.: Nothing to see. Where to go? Where to run. We got lost.
sn. And time goes by. Runs. Flies.
D.M. We must overtake him. (music, running in place) Well, we overtook.
Snow Maiden: No
DM: Then he must be detained. ...
Scenario of an extra-curricular event "On New Year's Eve ..." (for high school students)
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 7312 Human
Skomorokh 1
Attention! Attention!
Honorary Assembly!
That fairy tales are interesting
Of course, everyone knows.
But how a fairy tale is born
Nobody will guess.
Skomorokh 2
And hardly anyone knows
What happens on New Year's Eve
With heroes...
Scenario of the holiday "New Year in the Magic Kingdom"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 7969 Human
Fairy:
I'm not a magician, I'm just learning.
I know the basics of miracles by heart.
Do you want your eyes to shine with friendship?
Be yourself a comrade, a friend always.
Do you want to be more fun around?
Share your own smile.
Do you want beautiful...
New Year's scenario "New Year in the Olympic Village"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 3429 Human
Music sounds, a witch comes out, begins to conjure to the music.
Witch:
In old fairy tales nightmares
Sticky fear walks and wanders.
He lives in the hearts of people
Fetters for hearts weaves.
Hide, hide, month, into the cloud,
Arrows on...
Scene for the new year at the school "Control"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 1407 Human
Scene on New Year at school
Interactive quiz game "Who is sad in the New Year?"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 2019 Human
The melody "New Year's song" sounds
- Children, the melody of a song about a cheerful winter holiday sounds. Did you guess which one?
- Do you like this holiday?
- With what mood do you celebrate the New Year?
- What do you think, is everyone having fun in the New Year?
1 slide. ...
Speech therapy lesson in the form of a quiz "Hello, winter guest!"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 437 Human
Speech therapist: Guys, today we have a quiz. We'll play a little. To find out the topic of our quiz, you need to guess the riddle.
The cold has come
Turned into ice water
Long-eared hare gray
Turned into a white bunny
The bear stopped crying
V...
Extra-curricular event "Cool New Year"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 2278 Human
The preparatory phase of the classroom New Year begins on the first day of the second term. On this day, a draw is held: each student takes out the name of the student for whom he is preparing a New Year's gift. There are several rules: in - ...
New Year with monkey Chita. Children's scenario for the New Year's Eve
13.12.2014 | We looked at the script 1912 Human
Scene 1 In the foyer near the Christmas tree Abba the dog.
Ava: Hello children! I am the dog Avva. Chita and I help Dr. Aibolit treat all the animals in the world. Do you kids have pets at home? Which? Come on, name it! What are their names? (Children answer). And which of ...
Who is in charge in the New Year? part 2
13.12.2014 | We looked at the script 1251 Human
In the second part, all the characters go on stage at once, stand and sit down in their places. The words are pronounced in turn, in the same order (alternately going to the center of the stage). The look of all the participants is no longer so solemn, but more untidy. But the tone...
See also funny poems about school for children. The advantages of our funny scenes are that they do not require costumes, there is no need to memorize large texts (and the one who plays the role of a teacher can use a printout that can be put in a magazine), they need to be rehearsed for a short time. At the same time, these scenes are close to the students. They will be able to laugh at their mistakes, looking at themselves from the outside. Humor, jokes funny scenes for children about school are well suited for KVN. See also School Humor.
1. Scene "At the lessons of the Russian language"
Teacher: Let's see how you learned homework. Whoever goes to answer first will get a point higher.
Disciple Ivanov (pulls out his hand and shouts): Mary Ivanna, I will be the first, give me three at once!
Teacher: Your composition about a dog, Petrov, word for word is similar to Ivanov's composition!
Disciple Petrov: Mary Ivanna, so Ivanov and I live in the same yard, and there we have one dog for all!
Teacher: You, Sidorov, have a wonderful essay, but why is it not finished?
Student Sidorov: But because dad was urgently called to work!
Teacher: Koshkin, confess, who wrote the essay for you?
Pupil Koshkin: I don't know. I went to bed early.
Teacher: As for you, Klevtsov, let your grandfather come to me tomorrow!
Student Klevtsov: Grandpa? Maybe dad?
Teacher: No, grandfather. I want to show him what gross mistakes his son makes when he writes an essay for you.
Teacher: What kind of word is "egg", Sinichkin?
Student Sinichkin: None.
Teacher: Why?
Student Sinichkin: Because it is not known who will hatch from it: a rooster or a chicken.
Teacher: Petushkov, determine the gender of the words: “chair”, “table”, “sock”, “stocking”.
Disciple Petushkov: “Table”, “chair” and “sock” are masculine, and “stocking” is feminine.
Teacher: Why?
Disciple Petushkov: Because only women wear stockings!
Teacher: Smirnov, go to the blackboard, write down and analyze the sentence.
Student Smirnov goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates, and the student writes: "Dad went to the garage."
Teacher: Ready? We listen to you.
Student Smirnov: Dad - subject, left - predicate, in the garage - ... pretext.
Teacher: Who guys can come up with a sentence with homogeneous members?
Tyulkin's student holds out her hand.
Teacher: Please, Tyulkina.
Tyulkin's student: There were no trees, no bushes, no grass in the forest.
Teacher: Sobakin, come up with a sentence with the numeral "three".
Student Sobakin: My mother works at a knitwear factory.
Teacher: Rubashkin, go to the blackboard, write down the sentence.
Student Rubashkin goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates: The guys caught butterflies with nets.
Student Rubashkin writes: The guys caught butterflies with glasses.
Teacher: Rubashkin, why are you so inattentive?
Student Rubashkin: And what?
Teacher: Where did you see bespectacled butterflies?
Teacher: Bags, what part of speech is the word "dryish"?
Pupil Meshkov, getting up, is silent for a long time.
Teacher: Well, think, Meshkov, what question does this word answer?
Student Meshkov: What kind? Dryish!
Teacher: Antonyms are words that are opposite in meaning. For example, fat - thin, cry - laugh, day - night. Petushkov, give me your example now.
Pupil Petushkov: A cat is a dog.
Teacher: And what about "cat - dog"?
Disciple Petushkov: Well, how? They are opposite and often fight among themselves.
Teacher: Sidorov, why do you eat apples in class?
Disciple Sidorov: It's a pity to waste time at a break!
Teacher: Stop it now! By the way, why weren't you at school yesterday?
Disciple Sidorov: My older brother got sick.
Teacher: What about you?
Student Sidorov: And I rode his bike!
Teacher: Sidorov! My patience has run out! Don't come to school tomorrow without your father!
Student Sidorov: And the day after tomorrow?
Teacher: Sushkina, come up with a proposal with an appeal.
Sushkin's student: Mary Ivanna, call!
2. Scene "Correct answer"
Teacher: Petrov, how much will it be: four divided by two?
Student: And what to share, Mikhail Ivanovich?
Teacher: Well, let's say four apples.
Student: And between whom?
Teacher: Well, let it be between you and Sidorov.
Student: Then three for me and one for Sidorov.
Teacher: Why is that?
Student: Because Sidorov owes me one apple.
Teacher: Doesn't he owe you a plum?
Student: No, you shouldn't plum.
Teacher: Well, how much will it be if four plums are divided by two?
Student: Four. And all to Sidorov.
Teacher: Why four?
Student: Because I don't like plums.
Teacher: Wrong again.
Student: How much is correct?
Teacher: And now I will put the correct answer in your diary!
(I. Butman)
3. Scene "Our cases"
Characters: teacher and student Petrov
Teacher: Petrov, go to the blackboard and write down short story which I will dictate to you.
The student goes to the blackboard and prepares to write.
Teacher (dictates): “Dad and mom scolded Vova for bad behavior. Vova was silent guiltily, and then he promised to improve.”
The student writes from dictation on the blackboard.
Teacher: Great! Underline all the nouns in your story.
The student underlines the words: “dad”, “mother”, “Vova”, “behavior”, “Vova”, “promise”.
Teacher: Ready? Decide what case these nouns are in. Understood?
Student: Yes!
Teacher: Start!
Student: Mom and Dad. Who? What? Parents. So, the case is genitive.
Scolded whom, what? Vova. "Vova" is a name. So the case is nominative.
Scolded for what? For bad behavior. Apparently he did something. This means that “behavior” has an instrumental case.
Vova was silent guiltily. So, here “Vova” has an accusative case.
Well, the “promise”, of course, is in dative case, since Vova gave it!
That's all!
Teacher: Yes, the analysis turned out to be original! Bring the diary, Petrov. I wonder what mark you would suggest to give yourself?
Student: What? Of course, five!
Teacher: So five? By the way, in what case did you call this word “five”?
Student: Prepositional!
Teacher: In a prepositional? Why?
Student: Well, I suggested it myself!
(according to L. Kaminsky)
4. Scene "At the lessons of mathematics"
Characters: teacher and students of the class
Teacher: Petrov, you can hardly count to ten. I have no idea who you can become?
Disciple Petrov: Boxing judge, Mary Ivanna!
Teacher: Trushkin is coming to the board to solve the problem.
Student Trushkin goes to the blackboard.
Teacher: Listen carefully to the condition of the problem. Dad bought 1 kilogram of sweets, and mom bought another 2 kilograms. How many...
Disciple Trushkin goes to the door.
Teacher: Trushkin, where are you?!
Disciple Trushkin: I ran home, there are sweets!
Teacher: Petrov, bring the diary here. I'll put your yesterday's deuce in it.
Disciple Petrov: I don't have it.
Teacher: Where is he?
Disciple Petrov: And I gave it to Vitka - to scare my parents!
Teacher: Vasechkin, if you have ten rubles, and you ask your brother for another ten rubles, how much money will you have?
Disciple Vasechkin: Ten rubles.
Teacher: You just don't know math!
Disciple Vasechkin: No, you don't know my brother!
Teacher: Sidorov, please answer, how much is three times seven?
Student Sidorov: Marya Ivanovna, I will only answer your question in the presence of my lawyer!
Teacher: Why, Ivanov, does your father always do your homework for you?
Student Ivanov: Mom doesn't have free time!
Teacher: Now solve problem number 125 on your own.
The students get to work.
Teacher: Smirnov! Why are you copying from Terentiev?
Disciple Smirnov: No, Mary Ivanna, he is copying me, and I'm just checking whether he did it right!
Teacher: Guys, who is Archimedes? Answer, Shcherbinina.
Shcherbinin's student: This is a mathematical Greek.
5. Scene "At the lessons of natural history"
Characters: teacher and students of the class
Teacher: Who can name five wild animals?
Student Petrov raises his hand.
Teacher: Answer, Petrov.
Disciple Petrov: A tiger, a tigress and... three cubs.
Teacher: What are dense forests? Answer, Kosichkina!
Kosichkin's student: These are the kind of forests in which ... it's good to take a nap.
Teacher: Simakova, please name the parts of the flower.
Simakov's student: Petals, stem, pot.
Teacher: Ivanov, please answer us, what benefits do birds and animals bring to a person?
Student Ivanov: Birds peck mosquitoes, and cats catch mice for him.
Teacher: Petrov, what book about famous travelers have you read?
Apprentice Roosters: "Frog Traveler"
Teacher: Who will answer how the sea differs from the river? Please, Mishkin.
Disciple Mishkin: The river has two banks, and the sea has one.
Student Zaitsev holds out his hand.
Teacher: What do you want, Zaitsev? Is there something you want to ask?
Disciple Zaitsev: Mary Ivanna, is it true that people descended from monkeys?
Teacher: True.
Disciple Zaitsev: That's what I see: there are so few monkeys!
Teacher: Kozyavin, please answer, what is the life expectancy of a mouse?
Student Kozyavin: Well, Mary Ivanna, it entirely depends on the cat.
Teacher: Go to the blackboard ... Meshkov and tell us about the crocodile.
Student Meshkov (going to the blackboard): The length of the crocodile from head to tail is five meters, and from tail to head - seven meters.
Teacher: Think what you are saying! Is it possible?
Student Meshkov: It happens! For example, from Monday to Wednesday - two days, and from Wednesday to Monday - five!
Teacher: Khomyakov, answer me, why do people need a nervous system?
Disciple Khomyakov: To be nervous.
Teacher: Why do you, Sinichkin, look at your watch every minute?
Student Sinichkin: Because I'm terribly worried that the bell will interrupt the amazingly interesting lesson.
Teacher: Guys, who will answer where the bird flies with a straw in its beak?
Student Belkov raises his hand above all.
Teacher: Try, Belkov.
Pupil Belkov: To the cocktail bar, Mary Ivanna.
Teacher: Teplyakova, which teeth appear last in a person?
Teplyakov's student: Plug-in, Mary Ivanna.
Teacher: Now I will ask you a very complex issue, for the correct answer I will immediately put the top five with a plus. And the question is: “Why is European time ahead of American time?”
Student Klyushkin raises his hand.
Teacher: Answer, Klyushkin.
Disciple Klyushkin: Because America was discovered later!
6. Scene "Folder under the arm"
Vovka: Listen, I'll tell you a funny story. Yesterday I took a folder by mouse and went to Uncle Yura, my mother ordered.
Andrew: Ha-ha-ha! Indeed, it's funny.
Vovka (surprised): What's so funny? I haven't started talking yet.
Andrey (laughing): Folder... under the arm! Well thought out. Yes, your folder under the arm and will not fit, he's not a cat!
Vovka: Why "my folder"? Folder - daddy. You forgot how to speak correctly from laughter, or what?
Andrei: (winking and pounding his forehead): Ah, I guessed! Grandfather - under the arm! He speaks incorrectly, but he also teaches. Now it’s clear: dad’s folder is your grandfather Kolya! In general, it’s great you came up with it - funny and with a riddle!
Vova (offended): What does my grandfather Kolya have to do with it? I wanted to tell you something completely different. You didn’t listen to the end, but you laugh, you interfere with speaking. Yes, even dragged my grandfather, put him under his arm, what a storyteller was found! I'd rather go home than talk to you.
Andrei (to himself, left alone): And why was he offended? Why funny stories to tell if you can't laugh?
(I. Semerenko)
7. Scene "3=7 and 2=5"
Teacher: Well, Petrov? What am I to do with you?
Petrov: And what?
Teacher: All year you did nothing, did not study anything. I don't know exactly what to put in the statement.
Petrov (looking sullenly at the floor): I, Ivan Ivanovich, was engaged in scientific work.
Teacher: What are you? What?
Petrov: I decided that all of our mathematics is wrong and ... I proved it!
Teacher: Well, how, Comrade Great Petrov, did you achieve this?
Petrov: Ah, what can I say, Ivan Ivanovich! It's not my fault that Pythagoras was mistaken and this ... Archimedes!
Teacher: Archimedes?
Petrov: And he, too, After all, they said that three is only three.
Teacher: What else?
Petrov (solemnly): That's not true! I proved that three equals seven!
Teacher: How is it?
Petrov: Look, 15 -15 = 0. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: 35 - 35 = 0 - also true. So 15-15 = 35-35. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: We take out the common factors: 3(5-5) = 7(5-5). Right?
Teacher: Exactly.
Petrov: Hehe! (5-5) = (5-5). This is also true!
Teacher: Yes.
Petrov: Then everything is upside down: 3 = 7!
Teacher: Yep! So, Petrov, survived.
Petrov: I didn't want to, Ivan Ivanovich. But against science ... you can't sin!
Teacher: Understood. Look: 20-20 = 0. Right?
Petrov: Exactly!
Teacher: 8-8 = 0 - also true. Then 20-20 = 8-8. It is truth too?
Petrov: Exactly, Ivan Ivanovich, exactly.
Teacher: We take out the common factors: 5 (4-4) \u003d 2 (4-4). Right?
Petrov: Right!
Teacher: That's it, Petrov, I give you a "2"!
Petrov: For what, Ivan Ivanovich?
Teacher: Don't be upset, Petrov, because if we divide both parts of the equality by (4-4), then 2=5. So did you do it?
Petrov: Well, let's say.
Teacher: So I put "2", it doesn't matter. A?
Petrov: No, it's not all the same, Ivan Ivanovich, "5" is better.
Teacher: Perhaps better, Petrov, but until you prove it, you will have a deuce in a year, equal, in your opinion, to a five!
Guys, help Petrov.
(Newspaper "Primary School", "Mathematics", No. 24, 2002)
8. Scene "Schoolboy and seller"
Characters: a schoolboy and a shop assistant
Sales assistant: What do you suggest?
Schoolchild: The years of the reign of Nicholas II?
Sales assistant: I don't know.
Schoolchild: Okay ... Pythagorean theorem?
Sales Assistant: … (shrugs)
Schoolboy: Photosynthesis?
Sales Assistant: (sighing) I don't know...
Schoolboy: Well, what are you climbing then with your “What can I tell you?”!!!
(KVN team from Ryazan)
9. Scene "Schoolchildren at the stadium"
Characters: schoolchildren and stadium informant
A group of young fans led by a leader loudly chant:
"SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!" "SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!"
Suddenly, the voice of the stadium informant turns on:
Informant's voice: Attention young fans! (young fans stop chanting)
Your history teacher is at the match!
Young fans start chanting:
"SPA-RTAK IS A ROMAN SLAVE!" "SPA-RTAK IS A ROMAN SLAVE!"
(KVN team from Ryazan)
10. Scene "Unnecessary words, or Cool Dnieper in cool weather"
Characters: a cultured adult and a modern schoolboy Vanya Sidorov
Hello Vanya.
- Hello.
- Well, tell me, Vanya, how are you?
- Wu, the deeds of might.
- I'm sorry, what?
- Cool, I say, one wick blew such a thing. Rides to the sket. Give, he says, great to drive. Sat down and scratched. And here is the teacher. And he let's show off. Broke the mitten. Yes, how shaky. Himself with a black eye. The teacher almost went off the rails, but the bike hooted. In rzhachka. Cool, right?
- And what, there was a horse?
- What horse?
- Well, who was neighing. Or I didn't understand anything.
- Nu, nothing you not understood?
- Come on, let's start over.
- Well, let's. So one wick...
- Without a candle?
- Without.
- And what is this wick?
- Well, one guy, long, rolled up to the box ...
- What did he ride, on a bicycle?
- No, the child had a bicycle.
- Which sket?
- Well, shibzdik one. Yes, you know him, he walks around here with such a schnobel.
- With whom, with whom?
- Yes, not with whom, but with what, his nose is in the form of a schnobel. Well, let's go, he says, it's great to drive. Sat down and scratched.
- Did he itch something?
- No, he drank.
- Well, how did you cut it?
- What did you cut?
- Well, is it big?
- How?
- Well, this same, schnobel?
- No, the little girl had a schnobel. And the wick had a black eye, a bzig struck him in the head, and he began to roam. He opened his mitten, so he twitched.
- And why the mitten, did he twitch in the winter?
- Yes, there was no winter there, there was a teacher.
- Teacher, you mean.
- Well, yes, with a black eye, that is, with a great one, no, with coils. But the very rolling, that great whooped.
- How did you goof off?
- Well, covered up. into small pieces. Now understand?
- Understood. I realized that you do not know Russian at all.
- I don't know how!
- Can you imagine if everyone spoke the way you do, what would happen?
- What?
Do you remember Gogol's? "The Dnieper is wonderful in calm weather, when it rushes freely and smoothly through forests and mountains. full waters their own, neither rustle nor thunder. You look and you don’t know whether its majestic width is coming or not” and then “A rare bird will fly to the middle of the Dnieper”.
- I remember.
- Now listen to how it sounds in your bzik language: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather, when, roaming and showing off, it saws its cool waves through forests and mountains. you don't know if he saws or doesn't saw. A rare bird with a schnobel combs up to the middle of the Dnieper. Do you like?
- I like it, - he said and ran, shouting: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather."
(Lion Izmailov)
11. A young man in a nightclub
Characters: girl, young man, mother
A girl is sitting at the bar. A young man approaches her.
Young man: Hey babe! Are you bored?
GIRL: Yes, there are some.
YOUNG MAN: Can you come with me? I will arrange an unforgettable evening for you!
GIRL: Sounds. But my mother is waiting for me at 23-00 at home.
YOUNG MAN: Is mom waiting? Drop it! What are you, 10 years old? Do you go on dates with your mom? Ha!
Suddenly young man someone's hand confidently takes by the ear. Everyone sees that this is the hand of an aged woman.
YOUNG MAN: Mom? What are you doing here?
MOM: What are you doing here?
YOUNG MAN: Well, Mom! I AM…
MOM: I don't want to hear! March home!
YOUNG MAN: (to girl) Baby, I'll call you back!
MOM: Home!
(KVN team from Ryazan)
12. Radiologist's office
Characters: grandmother, boy, radiologist
Radiologist's office: X-ray machine, table, chair. The doctor is sitting at the table.
They enter the office little boy and grandmother.
GRANDMA (pointing to the boy). I've looked all over, there are no points anywhere. I think he swallowed them. All in his grandfather!
RADIOLOGIST (referring to the boy). Have you swallowed granny's glasses?
The boy does not answer.
GRANDMOTHER. Partisan! All in his grandfather!
RADIOLOGIST. Are you silent? But now we will enlighten you through and through and find out everything.
GRANDMA (happily). Yep, got it! Would love to have something like this at home.
RADIOLOGIST (examines the picture). Well, well, well ... You know ... he has here not only glasses, but also a wallet with money. I can’t say for sure, but somewhere around three hundred rubles.
GRANDMOTHER. It's not ours, we don't need someone else's. The main thing for me is to get glasses, I can’t watch TV without them.
RADIOLOGIST. We'll get it now.
The radiologist comes up to the boy, picks him up by his legs and shakes him. Glasses and wallet fall to the floor.
GRANDMA (grabbing glasses). Thank you very much, doctor. I don't even know how to thank you. Let me kiss you!
RADIOLOGIST (turns the wallet in his hands). Do not. But the wallet, if possible, I will leave myself as a keepsake.
GRANDMOTHER. It's not ours, not ours, we don't need someone else's.
Grandmother and grandson leave the office.
RADIOLOGIST (loudly). Next!
(A. Givargizov)
Characters:
Father: Serpent Gorynych
Head teacher: Baba Yaga
Math teacher: Leshy
Geography teacher: Kikimora
Botany Teacher: Witch
Class teacher: Water
ZMEY GORYNYCH (flies into the teacher's room):
... Yes, I told him a hundred times! ..
So what did he do again?
LESHIY:
Multiply a minus with a sine -
Got a minus one!
KIKIMORA:
Confused albinos
With albatrosses...
WITCH:
Threw apricots...
KIKIMORA:
Blowing soap bubbles!
LESHIY:
On a bet
Swallowed the call!
KIKIMORA:
Yawned the whole lesson
And infected everyone with a yawn!
WATER:
But yesterday
dragged to class
Behemoth!!!
LESHIY:
With this nasty boy
There is no sweetness!
BABA YAGA (unctuous):
Maybe give him poison?
Or throw it to the wolves?
AM -
And there is no bad student!
KIKIMORA:
Don't get excited, dear Yaga.
In our age
Such measures are outdated.
LESHIY:
A hundred years ago
We would have it
Certainly,
Ate...
But now
We have
Not many students
In reserve...
WATER:
I agree!
Let's not run
To extreme measures.
WITCH:
Let's try to get him
Good example.
ZMEY GORYNYCH (confused):
Mmmm... Less, more...
That is, more or less!
And yet...
WITCH (interrupts):
A...
Understand!
Your example doesn't work...
But boy
Doesn't want to study at all!
BABA YAGA:
Oh, how much trouble with children! ..
DRAGON:
Lock him in the closet - let him learn lessons!
And if he doesn't stop yawning...
ALL IN CHOIR:
We will turn it
In chewing gum
And we will
SLOWLY
Chew!
(E. Lipatova)
14. Daily routine
Characters:
Schoolboy Vova
Schoolboy Petya
PETER:
- And you, Vova, do you know what a regime is?
VOVA:
- Certainly! Regime… Regime is where I want, I jump there.
PETER:
- Not properly! Routine is the order of the day. Are you doing it?
VOVA:
- I even overfulfill it.
PETER:
- Like this?
VOVA:
- According to the schedule, I need to walk twice a day, and I walk four!
PETER:
- No, you are not overfulfilling it, but breaking it! Do you know what the daily routine should be?
VOVA:
- I know! Rise. Charger. Washing. Bed cleaning. Breakfast. School. Dinner. Walk. Prep. Walk.
PETER:
- Good.
VOVA:
- And it can be even better.
PETER:
- How is it?
VOVA:
- Like this! Rise. Breakfast. Walk. Lunch. Walk. Dinner. Walk. Tea. Walk. Dinner. Walk. Dream.
PETER:
- Oh no. In this mode, you will turn out to be a lazy and ignoramus.
VOVA:
- Will not work.
PETER:
- Why?
VOVA:
- Because with my grandmother we carry out the whole regimen.
PETER:
- How is it with your grandmother?
VOVA:
- And so. Half of it is done by me, and half by my grandmother. And together it turns out the whole regime.
PETER:
- I do not understand!
VOVA:
- Very simple. I do the lifting. Charging is performed by the grandmother. Washing is a grandmother. Bed cleaning - grandmother. Breakfast is me. Walk - me. Cooking lessons - my grandmother and I. Walk - me. Lunch is me.
PETER:
- Aren't you ashamed?! Now I understand why you are so undisciplined.
https://website/smeshnye-scenki-dlya-detej/
15. About Pushkin
Two duelists stand opposite each other. One of them is Pushkin.
Second: Come on!
Pushkin and his opponent raise their pistols. Approach barriers. Pushkin's opponent makes a shot. Pushkin is wounded. The enemy approaches the wounded Pushkin.
Pushkin: For what?
Pushkin's opponent: Bastard! Because of you, they left me for the second year in literature !!!
16. School riddles
Characters: Schoolboy, his friend - Vovka Sidorov
SCHOOLCHILD (addressing confidentially to the audience, pointing to a friend standing nearby):
And Vovka Sidorov from our class is slow-witted! Here I came across interesting riddles about school affairs, and riddles should be in rhyme. Of course, I guessed everything right away, and then I decided to test Vovka for quick wits.
SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Here, guess the riddle in rhyme: “Between two calls, the term is called ...”
VOVKA SIDOROV (instantly):
Turn!
SCHOOLBOY:
Well, that's right, "change" is suitable, but there should be a guess in rhyme!
VOVKA SIDOROV (offended):
Yeah, he himself said that it was right, and then you start ...
SCHOOLBOY:
Okay, let me give you another riddle, just think before you say the answer. “The athlete told us: Everyone go to the sports ...”
VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts):
Score!
SCHOOLBOY:
Which store? What for? Where did you see him?
VOVKA SIDOROV:
What do you mean why? I need to buy new sneakers, otherwise the sole of mine is already lagging behind on my left foot. And the Sporting Goods store is right in front of the school. You, too, have seen him a hundred times.
SCHOOLBOY (to the side of the hall):
Well, what can you prove to him here!
SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Can you solve this riddle in rhyme? “Schools are not simple buildings, schools get…”
VOVKA SIDOROV:
Over the head! Yesterday, I almost didn’t touch the bow at Lenka Petrova’s, and she bang-bang me with a book on the head.
SCHOOLBOY:
Listen to another riddle: “And today I got another grade…”
VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts):
Three, three I again received in mathematics.
STUDENT (addressing the audience in the hall):
Well Vovka and slow-witted! Well dumbass! Although ... I look, his face is cunning, tricky. Maybe he played me? Today is April 1st!!!
(Leonid Medvedev)
17. About parents
A man in a clothing store dials a number on his cell phone.
Man: Hello, honey! … Did our Mishka do his homework? … Yes? How about in his diary? Good, yes?! So, did he leave the room? Crap! Did you eat soup? Nothing ... I just went to the store, and then the sale of belts!
