Anniversary of death when to remember. Days of Special Remembrance of the Deceased

Wake - a ritual performed to honor the memory of the deceased. The basis of the commemoration is a joint meal arranged by loved ones in the house of the deceased person, or in the dining room.

Commemoration is carried out:

on the day of death;
three days after death - the day of the funeral, when the soul goes to another world;
on the ninth day;
on the fortieth day;
a memorial meal is arranged six months after the death, and after that for all further anniversaries.

As usual, relatives or close people of the deceased come to the funeral. It is important to remember that it is impossible to drive away those who came to honor the memory of the deceased. As a rule, commemorations are organized not for guests and not for the sake of a feast, but in order to remember the deceased, to pray for his repose. It is especially important to read a prayer for the deceased before the memorial meal. Priests advise reading the seventeenth Kathisma from the Psalter and the prayer "Our Father" before starting to eat.

Wake date shift

It happens that the memorial day falls on a church holiday, or on working days, when it is not possible to leave work, in connection with the preparation of everything necessary for the memorial meal. As a result, the question arises: is it possible to postpone the date of commemoration?

Priests believe that a meal can be arranged earlier or later than the exact date of death. If there are valid reasons preventing the memorial dinner, you should keep the landmark, the first duty, it is on them. However, if not good reasons to move the memorial meal to another day, it is better not to do this, because in afterlife there are rules. On this day, it is better to focus on good deeds, for example, to distribute memorial treats to people in need.

It is not necessary to hold a wake during Easter and Passion Week of Great Lent. In these weeks, everything is rushing towards the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, as well as the news of his return to life. Therefore, if the date allotted for the memorial dinner coincides with these periods, it is best to move the memorial meal to the day of Radonitsa - the day when the dead are commemorated.

If the day of commemoration falls on the eve of the Christmas holidays, it would be more correct if the commemoration is moved to January 8th. Such an event is taken as good omen, because the commemoration is dedicated to the event of birth in an endless life in another world.

Priests also recommend remembering that the deceased, in the first place, should be prayed for. Therefore, the day before the memorial meal, it is recommended to order the Liturgy for the burial of the Soul of the deceased and the Panikhida for the memorial day. And the memorial meal can be postponed to one of the first days off of subsequent anniversaries of death. However, it is not advisable to postpone the commemoration, arranged on the fortieth day after the repose, for an early date.

Memorial Day

In each religion, a certain date is set aside for the memorial day, when relatives, or just close people, commemorate the deceased. If, due to urgent circumstances, it was not possible to honor the memory of close deceased people on the day of their death, this must be done on the memorial day.

In the Orthodox faith, the memorial day is Tuesday of the second week after Easter. However, this is not the only day when you can remember relatives. In addition to Radonitsa, five more days are allocated for the memory of the dead;
In Catholic belief, the memorial day falls on November 2. Commemoration on the third, seventh and thirtieth days may not suit;
In the religion of Islam, the main task is to remember the deceased by prayer, to do good deeds on his behalf: to help orphans, poor people. In this religion, it does not matter at all on what day after the repose of the soul a memorial meal will be arranged. It is important that no one should know in whose name these acts are being performed;
In Buddhism, the day of obedience - the festival of Ulamban - falls on the first half of the seventh month of the lunar calendar.

Everyone knows that people who have gone to another world should be remembered, but not often people understand the purpose for which this should be done. Do not forget that the connection between the living and the dead exists. Therefore, after the death of a person, his relatives are restless, in their souls there is anxiety and sadness, they often dream of the dead who ask for food or provide them with some kind of help.

It is generally accepted that after such dreams a person should pray, visit the temple, do some good deed (help the poor, orphans). All this benevolence has a good effect on the souls of the dead. If it is not possible to arrange a memorial service on the appointed day, do not be upset. You can leave a note to the clergyman, and he will carry it out himself.

The spiritual state of a person also influences the state of the deceased in the afterlife, in another world in order to help them. To do this, one should begin to change, first of all, oneself and the society around oneself. To begin with, it would be nice to get rid of bad habits, forgive all your offenders, not harbor evil on them, start praying, visiting churches, reading the Bible, helping others and orphans.

During the commemoration, one should remember the purpose, a kind of ritual. Saying a common prayer, it is better to ask the Lord God to endow the deceased with the Kingdom of Heaven and rest his soul.

After physical death, a person remains in the memory of relatives and close people. Therefore, on the day of his death, they gather to remember him together. At the same time, there are certain rules that have become traditions. This is the pronunciation of soulful words, the reading of poems and prayers. This will be discussed in the article.

About some traditions of commemoration

Commemoration (or commemoration) is a series of ritual actions that allow you to maintain the memory of the dead. Relatives are mainly involved in the organization of memorial days. If there are none left, then friends or other close people.
Usually funeral traditions are based on certain beliefs - paganism, Islam, Hinduism. Therefore, different peoples they are different. For Russians, the rules of commemoration are closely connected with the Christian faith. Sometimes rituals are mixed, taken from different religious directions and local customs. Often, certain rituals are created on this basis.
In the Russian Christian tradition, there are a number of basic rules, deviation from which is rare. For example, funeral and other prayers are read in the church only if the deceased was baptized according to the Orthodox rite. And also in churches they do not pray for those who independently committed suicide, preached heretical beliefs.

Memorial dates

Orthodox Christians arrange a commemoration immediately after the funeral.
In the near future after death, the deceased are commemorated three times: the first time - on the third day after death; the second time - on the ninth; the third time - on the fortieth.
Subsequently, a commemoration is held every year on the day of death.

Wake after the funeral and on the year of death

The meaning of memorial days

Commemoration on each of these days has its own special meaning associated with the events of Christian history.

The third day

The memorial meal on the third day is celebrated in connection with with the ascension to heaven of Jesus Christ on the third day after his crucifixion. The resurrection from the dead and the transition to eternal life is the main doctrine of Christian teaching. According to church tradition, after death human soul"wanders" before higher powers it will be determined where she will go before doomsday- to heaven or hell. For the first three days, the soul of the deceased is still on earth, visiting the places of his life in the body shell and the people with whom the person was connected.

Ninth day

On the ninth day, the commemoration is performed as a celebration of the angels who ask God to have mercy on the soul of the deceased. At this time, the soul of a deceased person flies around heavenly abodes, getting acquainted with the forms of another life. On the ninth day, the next of kin are invited to the wake. Near the table at which they dine, a photograph of the deceased is placed. A glass filled with vodka is placed next to it, a piece of bread is placed on it. It should be noted that the custom to put a glass takes its roots in pagan beliefs. For true Christians, it is unacceptable.

fortieth day

After nine days, the soul is presented with pictures of the torment of sinners serving a posthumous punishment in hell. This continues until the fortieth day. On this day, the Almighty finally determines where the soul of the deceased will be sent. Everyone is invited to the commemoration on the fortieth day, as well as those who were absent from the funeral.

How to hold a memorial on the anniversary of death

Here are some rules observed at the wake on the anniversary of death.

What is ordered in the church on the anniversary of death

According to Christian teaching, reading prayers for the souls of the departed is the debt of the living. Thanks to this, the fate of sinners is facilitated. It is to the ascension of petitions to the Almighty for the forgiveness of the sins of the dead that the reading of prayers for the dead in the church is directed. You can order a memorial service not only on the anniversary of death, but also on other days.

In temples for such prayers there are special types services:

Commemoration of the dead during the Divine - the main Christian service.
Panikhida.
lithium.
Reading the Psalter.

How they commemorate during the Liturgy

This type of commemoration is the most significant. The names of the dead are mentioned:

One of the prominent experts in the church charter Saint Athanasius (in the world - Sakharov) notes that the reading of memorial prayers during the proskomedia and after the consecration of the holy gifts is the most important. He says that such prayers, although silent, in their strength and effectiveness cannot be compared with any other prayers and even deeds in memory of the departed.

memorial service

Translated from Greek memorial service literally means night service. This name is used for praying for the dead due to the fact that in its structure it is similar to one of the parts of the all-night vigil. And also because the ancient Christians performed services at night. This was a forced phenomenon, as they were subjected to incessant persecution. Panikhida is one of the most common services ordered to commemorate deceased relatives on the day of the death anniversary. Memorial services, except for the temple, are performed both at home and at the grave. On it you can pray for one or several dead people.

lithium

Indestructible Psalter

This prayer is read continuously for several days. Usually it is ordered in monasteries, where the monks read it while sitting, replacing each other. The Psalter is a collection of ancient psalms written primarily by the Biblical King David. They have great power and are considered a great mercy for the departed souls. After reading the Indestructible Psalter, sinful souls are cleansed, defeat demons and rise from hellfire.
Since ancient times, the Indestructible Psalter, like other prayers, has been read at the wake of relatives at home. To do this, there are a number of rules that must be followed. In order for prayers to have an effect, the rules must be followed with great accuracy. Relatives agree in advance on the order in which they will read the Indestructible Psalter.

How to order a commemoration in the church

Rules for home reading prayers for the anniversary of death

The rules for reading the psalter on the anniversary of death look like this.

Having united in a group, relatives read the Indestructible Psalter in its entirety for one day.
Arriving at their home, each of them reads one of the twenty parts of the psalter, called kathisma (which means sitting), mentioning everyone who also participates in the rite. This creates a feeling of unity of all those who pray at this time for the soul of the deceased.
The next day, the variant of reading by each relative at home is repeated, but with the reading of another part of the psalter.
In total, prayers must be repeated at least forty times.

In conclusion, it must be said that before you start the commemoration at the table, you need to pick up appropriate words for death anniversary so as not to offend relatives and the memory of the deceased. Sometimes the congregation read memorial verses on the anniversary of death. It is better if they contain warm feelings for the deceased, and not just express the bitterness of loss.

Wake for 1 year after death

Consider the numberological (numerical) method of an event that is associated with the departure human being from life, i.e. state of death. Staying in the invisible world takes some time, which in the conventional language of the earthlings of the visible world is designated as forty days. This number 40 has become an important symbolic number for us, we attribute it to the Soul of a person who continues his existence in another reality.

Let us pay attention to the actions that we perform in memory of departed loved ones, friends, acquaintances, called commemoration.

What we do.

Returning from the cemetery (or from the crematorium), we gather together to honor the memory of a deceased person on this day.

These are the first reminders.

On the ninth day we gather for the second time and this is the second commemoration.

The third commemoration falls on the fortieth day.

Using the numberological language (method of cognition), we will try to explain the correctness of our actions during the death of a person close to us, an acquaintance or any other.

Numberology is a science that explains the meaning of events. It points to accuracy, revealing errors, delusions (which comes from ignorance) in something. This precision allows you to correctly perform any actions that are consistent with Nature, so as not to deviate from harmony.

Explanation.

Death is a state of transition (from life to another state of being), which takes a certain period of time. By analogy, we can find the likeness of death in our lives. The time of death will fall on the night part of the day, when the past Day "dies" (morning, afternoon, and evening - trinity). Night for us will be a time of transition, and sleep will be death.

Morning we can take for the beginning of our life, if we consider all life in this way; the day is our whole life until old age, and the evening is our old age and the end of life. Night is our death and departure from life.

Numbering the parts of the day in order, we get: 1 - morning, 2 - afternoon, 3 - evening, 4 - night. The number 4 will be transitional: from one day to another, and hence from one life to another.

Our dreams, which are a symbol of death, will turn out to be "commemoration" for us, because. most often in dreams the events of earthly life are recalled, and this is morning, afternoon and evening. These commemorations are performed in a state of transition from one day to another, which is the night.

The transition has received its symbol from us - this is the number 4. Thus, what precedes the transition, i.e. old age, end, evening - will be symbolic of the number 3.

A deceased person goes through his mortal path in the world invisible to us, but not to him, also from 1 to 4. And there is the beginning of the path, like morning, the continuation of the path is day and its completion is evening. Further transition - night.

About the human body.

On such “night-transitions” we can commemorate people who have left our lives.

In order to understand what these periods are, one must know the structure of a human being. In this world where we live, we have a Body that everyone can see. But it is only quality reflecting the invisible number. This number- there are three invisible bodies: the etheric - the vital body, the astral - the sensitive body and the mental - the thinking body. Together with the physical visible Body, all bodies constitute one human being. (1 + 2 + 3 + 4 = 10, and 10 = 1 + 0 = 1 is one).

With the end of life (and the end is the number 3), the deceased begins to say goodbye to his body of flesh, which has four bodies: three invisible quantitative and one visible quality(begins to "say goodbye" to each body in turn).

The first body that the deceased leaves is the physical, qualitatively visible body. Because it quality, then it is not divided into parts and is not measured separately. Living parts of the Day (morning, afternoon and evening), the Body remains one, but the fourth in a row, and three are counted. quantitative bodies of the invisible world.

Similarly, the time of night, being the fourth part, is the same for dreams, where everything happens in turn: morning, afternoon, and evening.

This means: that three bodies are three units (1 1 1), which are displayed in the four by their trinity. In order to imagine this, it is necessary to imagine a triangle (semi-square), which is reflected by exactly the same triangle, while we already get a new quality in the form of a square, and not two triangles.

The number four - 4 differs from the number three - 3 by one unit, which is added as a "unity" of two triangles. (Two triangles connected is a square, or a quadrilateral at different angles of the triangles.)

At the time of death, the deceased, leaving the Body, first loses quality physical Body (square) and functions (a triangle that reflected another triangle). Life begins without the Body, but it is already short-lived, because. without visible body quality cannot exist quantitative body (consisting of three). This life is determined by the number 3, because. the trinity of things in the world is the basis, the first brick of all life (a triangle is the first closed figure after a line and an angle, which are considered numbers 1 and 2).

In Numberology, all the constituent parts of something under consideration are connected by a plus (+) sign, and the function of the parts (action, work, force ...) that produces any result is the multiplication sign (x). These signs will have to be used to explain what happens after the deceased leaves the physical Body.

What's happening.

Once in the ethereal world - the first in a row, a person begins to perceive the world with ethereal vision. Unlike quality physical Body, where sight is not quality, but reverses quantitative, alternately, this body gives an advantage quality perception: all earthly life is here “in the palm of your hand”, i.e. viewed in its entirety. On Earth, it was lived in time, where events succeeded one another (in parts).

According to earthly time, this happens for three days (three days). On the fourth day (night-transition), the deceased leaves the first etheric body, remaining in the second body - the astral one. In this segment of the path, sensory perception occurs (shame, pride, torment, conscience, joy, admiration, grief, calmness, etc. - all this arises from the contemplation of a previously past life; this is like a Judgment, where good and bad deeds are noted in difference ). This perception takes place for nine days (as 3 x 3, i.e. doubled three, because the world and the body are second in a row).

What we do not do, but how to do it.

Thus, we can make a commemoration for the dead for the first time on the day of the funeral, i.e. on the fourth day (4 - transition).

The second time we will add (+) stay in two worlds (the first ethereal - 3 days and the second astral - 9 days), while getting the time of the second astral death, i.e. 3 + 9 = 12 (12 = 1 + 2 = 3). And not on the ninth day from death physical body, and (after nine) - already on the thirteenth, we can commemorate the departed person, because limit of life astral body- this is 12 days (3 + 9), and the transition will take place at the next earth time, i.e. on the day of the fourth (13 = 1 + 3 = 4).

The third body still remains to live, and this life takes the time of three triples (3 x 3 x 3) of the three worlds, i.e. twenty seven days (27).

A person at this time understands with his mental body (body of thought) everything that concerns life on Earth. He understands why he incarnated at all, and is disappointed if he did not remember his cosmic task, having lived his life only to satisfy his Body (with sex, money, food, work, raising other people or children), without working on himself, on his Soul.

The limit of stay in the mental world, the third one, is 27 days, and in total with other worlds (the addition of parts is the “+” sign), the number 39 = 3 + 9 + 27 is obtained (and the number 39 is 3 + 9 = 12 = 3). And on the next earth day, there will be a transition to another reality, where the Human Soul resides, freed from four bodies. This is the third four - the fortieth day (40).

Having written in one line the path of the deceased according to the days of transitions, we get:

(3) + (3 x 3) + (3 x 3 x 3) = 3 + 9 + 27 = 39,

or 3 + 3 (squared) + 3 (cubed) = 39,

and, adding the quality -1 (unity), we get the number 40, as the total number of the implementation of the process of death.

Thus, fours take part in memorial days - 4. But our ignorance leads to distortions such as a “broken phone”, and we fall into “inaccuracy”, which is typical for our life (and knowledge of Numberology gives accuracy!), And with “not accurate” the time of the commemoration will move (which is happening) from the thirteenth day (13 = 4) to the ninth. This means that we commemorate as if the living, and not the dead, we perform actions earlier than the appointed day.

Number 13.

However, the “transitional” number 4 has come down to our times in the form of three fours together with one, their unity: 4 is the fourth day of the commemoration, 4 is the thirteenth day of the commemoration and 4 is the fortieth day, i.e. 4 + 4 + 4 \u003d 12 + 1 \u003d 13. The number 13 is “dangerous” for us for a reason. It remained in our memory (no longer from a damaged phone) from ancient times, when knowledge about the secret and invisible world was revealed to people.

But the number 13 (4) is transitional not only in death, but also in birth. Forty (4) weeks - and a person is born into the visible world, therefore the number 13 is dual in nature (the direction of the path is important: to visible world, or to the invisible).

How can a born person know about what represents not only the number 13, but also other numbers that “live” with us? Who thought about the questions "why" and "how" something happens? Many take the world in the form of the question "what is it?" and receive in response only the name of things and phenomena, sort of like an acquaintance with what they have to live with.

(Information about the number 13 can be found on the Forum page of this site: http://nomer7777.ucoz.ru/forum/2-4-1).

Looking at this Circle of the Universe, one can understand about the days of the Transition, this is every fourth Circle:

If we want to find ourselves a life partner, then it is not enough for us to know only his name. What matters to us is its manifestation, i.e. the manner of his behavior, the properties inherent in the Soul, which are only reflected through the Body. The Soul is more important to us, because The body is beautiful, but the behavior resembles moral ugliness. The body can only sympathize with us (to be pleasing to the eyes - vision), but we love for the inner quality, which is expressed by the number of symbolic expressions through the body, (manners of movement - gait, gestures, expression of thought, manner of speaking - everything that is a personal dignity of a person, his qualities of the Soul - all these are signs that reflect it).

Wake for 1 year after death

The commemoration is the embodiment of a living Idea, of which we know only the name - the ritual. Repeating meaningless actions that answer the question “what” (should be done after the death of a person), we are like a robot, some kind of thoughtless creature.

In many things we repeat after those who were born before us, because. we do not ask questions: “how” (correctly) and “why” (we must do something that could be posed by the question “what is this before us?”). We follow thoughtlessly, and then ask “why do we dream of the deceased?”, To which we receive an answer in the form of advice: “Put a candle!”. Thus, with the help of the dream and the deceased, the question “why” is born in us. You can already understand this as a sign of the absence connections, because memory is a connection of times: of what has gone into the past and carried away loved one, and what comes from the future, which we, living today, perceive as the present.

Ritual of seeing off.

Wake as an event has its own inner life, because what we do is an external manifestation (ritual). But manifestation can be perfect (good) or imperfect (bad). And if we are already doing our actions in the name of Memory, then it is desirable to achieve an effect in what has been done, which will communication with the deceased, who is either escorted by us on his further journey (with the number 4), or not escorted (with the number 3).

In the meantime, it turns out: we came to see off a person to the station, whose train will be tomorrow. There is no person near the train, but we blindly perform the ritual of seeing off. And tomorrow he will go alone ... Without saying goodbye on time, he will be saddened by our absence. This sadness can be felt unconsciously (in the earthly world and in the body) by the Soul of living people (although in its own world it feels consciously). But do we have organs to see something internal and hear it if we are blind and deaf? We are those of whom it can be said - "having no eyes to see" and "having no ears to hear." We need a healer so that we gain Insight in many things.

New topic.

For me personally, Numberology was such a healer. it is the science of the Wholeness of the World, of its not divided into parts, Nature.

We must always remember that the ultimate goal (wholeness) of our life is death. But death is not the End (not the number 3).

Death is a transition (number 4), but the transition to where?

The Numerology method will allow you to answer this question, but it will already be new topic. In it, I will try to highlight the path along which our further existence, connected with the number 5, will continue, because. we celebrate the fourth commemoration a year later, and a year is equal to the number 365 as the number of total consecutive days. This number points to the number 5, as the sum 365 = 3 + 6 + 5 = 14 = 1 + 4 = 5.

The commemoration as a word (the sum of the serial numbers of the letters of the alphabet) indicates the number 4, because P 17 + O 16 + M 14 + And 10 + H 15 + K 12 + And 10 as a result give the sum = 94, which is 9 + 4 = 13, or 1 + 3 = 4

The death of a loved one is a great grief. But, unfortunately, it cannot be avoided. If a dear person has died, then loved ones have many questions. Where to bury? How to think over the menu? Is a canteen or cafe better suited for such an event? And it's far from complete list questions. Today we will talk about commemorations.

Such a meal is not just a meal, but a rite during which loved ones remember the deceased, his good deeds. During this event, people read a prayer addressed to God. They ask to forgive the deceased for all his sins. Of course, a memorial dinner should be properly thought out, the menu of which must be compiled correctly. To make it easier for you to decide on the list of dishes, we will tell you what you need to cook for this event and why.

Memorial Dinner Principles

The lunch itself should be simple. Its main goal is to maintain the physical and mental strength of those who came to commemorate the deceased. Everything must be prepared from fresh ingredients. This is what a memorial service should be like. Its menu can be varied. It all depends on the traditions of the family, wealth, as well as the preferences of the people who come to commemorate. Although, of course, guests are not traditionally invited, they themselves come.

A memorial dinner is not a feast during which you need to feed those who came to satiety. The purpose of the commemoration is to satiate the guests, thank them for their participation, remember the deceased, and pray for his soul. Here, as you understand, the main thing is not food, but people - the dead and the living, who were united by the grief of parting.

Planning a funeral dinner

We will describe the menu a little later, now we will consider the main dishes that should be at this dinner. Firstly, (the second option is Kolivo). What it is? It is boiled from grains (rice, barley and others), sweetened with honey and raisins. Such a dish is consecrated at a memorial service. Grain here is a symbol of the resurrection of the soul, and honey and raisins denote spiritual sweetness.

What do you need?

The list of products is small:

0.5 kilograms of rice;
200 grams of dried apricots;
three st. l. honey;
nuts (optional)
200 grams of raisins;
1 liter of water (for soaking).

How is the dish prepared? Soak the grains in water overnight or for several hours. This is necessary in order for the porridge to turn out crumbly. You need to cook until done. Toward the end, add honey diluted with water, as well as raisins and dried apricots. This is how kutya is obtained.

Borsch

This is another must have dish. For five liters of water we need:

700 grams of meat on the bone (preferably beef);
three potatoes;
two bulbs;
one beetroot (small);
three tomatoes;
one bell pepper (it is best to use red or green);
one cabbage;
a few peas of black pepper;
greenery;
salt.

Cooking borscht for a funeral dinner

For such a dish, first prepare the broth from the meat on the bone (boil for two hours). After that, you need to add chopped potatoes there. Then take a frying pan, pour oil into it, put it on the stove, pour finely chopped onions into it. After about three minutes, add carrots and beets (of course, also chopped) to the pan. If the beets are processed in this way, they will be able to retain their color.

Carrots will get bright, orange tint. Vegetables need to be simmered in a pan until they become soft. Remember that carrots, onions, and beets retain their flavor and most of their vitamins when cooked over high heat. Then pour the contents of the pan into the broth, boil everything a little, add chopped cabbage, Bay leaf, a few black peppercorns, chopped tomatoes and sweet peppers.

Cook for another 15 minutes. Then you need to try the dish and salt. After that, you can turn off the fire and remove the borscht from the stove. Serve the dish hot, with sour cream. You can sprinkle with herbs.

Sweet

You can buy pies, or you can bake them yourself. We offer a banana puff recipe. What do you need?

package of ready-made dough (500 g);
bananas (gram 200-300);
powdered sugar (to taste).

Cooking sweets for a wake

Take the finished puff pastry. Let it thaw, then roll it out. Then take a knife and draw rectangles with it. Spread the banana filling on them (fruit cut into small pieces). Then connect the edges of the dough so that the filling is completely in it. Next, pinch the products a little. Bake in a preheated oven at 220 degrees for about fifteen minutes. Products should be browned. Sprinkle finished puffs with powdered sugar.

Compote

For cooking, you can use both fresh and frozen fruits. Compote should not be sweet or too sour. How to cook? Put a five-liter pot of water on the fire, let it boil, pour in fruit (about 1 liter filled jar). Then add sugar (to taste) and cook until tender (about an hour).

The first version of the menu for thirty people

Now let's talk about what should be a funeral dinner. The menu after the funeral may be different. We offer our:

If you will be holding a funeral dinner for a year, this menu is quite suitable for this event. Kutya, however, can be removed from the list. It is an obligatory dish only at the wake after the funeral. And then - as you wish.

Second menu option for 12 people

Now we will analyze the approximate menu of a funeral dinner in a cafe or at home (for forty days). So, the list of products:

fried fish in batter (two kilograms);
mashed potatoes (2.5-3 kilograms);
salad "Olivier" (two kilograms);
cutlets (pieces 12, approximately 1.2 kg of minced meat);
sandwiches with red fish or sprats;
pies with cabbage or potatoes (pieces 12-15);
pickled cucumbers and tomatoes (about 1 kg);
5 liters of liquid (water + juices + compote)
sweets and sweet cakes (optional).

If you plan to hold another funeral dinner later, the menu for six months, for example, may be the same. Although, of course, you can adjust the list of dishes at your discretion.

Lean

Thinking through everything, pay attention to whether the commemoration fell on the post. If the answer is yes, then you need to adjust the funeral dinner (menu). Lenten set of dishes will not only be appropriate. but even necessary. What to prepare for such a wake? How to correct the usual menu, making it lean? Now let's make a rough list of foods:

knot;
lean borscht;
kutya;
lean pies;
potatoes with mushrooms;
cabbage or carrot cutlets;
vegetable salad (cabbage, tomatoes, cucumbers);
the vinaigrette.

Alcohol

We described in detail how to think over the funeral dinner, we also discussed its menu. Now let's touch on one more important topic. "What?" - you ask. Should you drink alcohol during the funeral? There is no clear answer to this question. Some priests believe that during the funeral dinner, you can drink some red wine. The Church condemns the use of alcoholic beverages during such a ceremony. Therefore, here you must decide for yourself whether you need alcohol at a memorial dinner or not.

Conclusion

Now you know how to make a funeral dinner. We have reviewed the menu in detail. We have offered you a couple of options for approximate lists of dishes for the commemoration. We hope that our tips have helped you decide on the choice of food for such a dinner.

In Russia it is customary to celebrate important dates- during life, these are birthdays, and after death - to remember the day of departure. This date is especially important for Christians. After all, they believe in the resurrection and the subsequent eternal life with God. Therefore, the existence of the soul has no end for believers. How worthy, in Christian terms, to commemorate the deceased on the anniversary of death?

Funeral traditions

In Orthodoxy, it is customary to commemorate the dead; there was such a rite among the ancient Slavs. It is performed on the very day of the funeral, then after 9, 40 days. On the anniversary of death, it is also customary to gather for a special meal. How to remember the deceased if he was a Christian? The most important thing, of course, is prayer. It is also necessary to refrain from copious libations, and preferably from alcohol in general. In no case should the solemn commemoration turn into wild fun. This is very far from Christian traditions.

In addition to private prayer, on the anniversary of death in the church they order:

a special commemoration during the Liturgy is the morning service, during which particles are taken out of the consecrated bread for the departed. It is customary to order the so-called "sorokoust" - they will be commemorated at forty services;

memorial service - usually served on Saturdays, but you can arrange with the priest for another day. You can come to the memorial service weekly, but the anniversary is a particularly important day;

lithium - another type of funeral service, it is somewhat shorter than a memorial service. It is served at any time, for its commission you can bring a priest to the cemetery.

Be sure to pray at any of this commemoration by the family members themselves, friends of the deceased. After all, the priest cannot invest those feelings and emotions that are experienced by loved ones. He acts as a performer of the rite. Of course, his prayer has power, but one cannot entrust everything to others. After all we are talking about the fate of a loved one.

But this is not all that is ordered in the church. On the anniversary of death, the Psalter is appropriate. Usually it is ordered in monasteries, it is done for a long time. Depending on the donation for a month, for half a year or for a whole year. Again - be sure to remember the deceased every day. For this in morning rule There are special short prayers.

In church shops, special books are sold, where you can enter everyone who needs to be commemorated. You can take this book to the temple so that you don’t forget anyone when submitting notes. When the deacon or priest reads the notes, be sure to pray yourself.

Other memorial days

There are both private commemorations and special church holidays when it is customary to go to cemeteries. This is the so-called "parents' day", it is celebrated several times. These days, too, it is necessary to commemorate the dead, regardless of when they departed to another world.

2nd Tuesday after Easter is a rolling day. In some Russian regions, there is a tradition to visit the graves right on the day Christ's Resurrection, although this is not officially approved - Easter is such a bright day, it is believed that there are no dead on this day.

Even if this is not the anniversary of death, the joyful words “Christ is Risen!” all the dead must hear. The name of the memorable day is corresponding - Radonitsa. For all there is hope for eternity with God, therefore this day is intended for joint joy - in heaven and on earth. It is customary to have a meal at the graves, bring colored eggs, pancakes, and distribute the leftovers of the meal to the poor.

All the dead are also commemorated on other days:

Trinity Saturday - the Saturday before Pentecost;

Meatless Saturday - before the start of Lent;

Saturdays during Great Lent - 2nd, 3rd, 4th.

The deceased person still remains a member of the universal church, so memorial services can be ordered all the time.

How to spend a sad anniversary

A worthy death is the crown of the believer's life. In daily prayers there are petitions for God to vouchsafe a shameful death. Orthodox strive to confess and take communion before meeting with the Creator. There are special rites that are performed on the dying. After death, they are no longer repeated.

In order for the anniversary of death to be celebrated with dignity, it is necessary to start the commemoration in the temple. This may be the presence at the Liturgy, then at the memorial service, or simply a pre-ordered lithium. After that, drive to the cemetery, there to perform a civil memorial service, or read the 17th kathisma. After that, have a meal, remember the deceased, clean up the grave. Drinking vodka, especially pouring it on the grave, is not an Orthodox custom that will not help the deceased in any way!

It is better to bring fresh flowers to the graves, this corresponds Christian traditions. Temples never have artificial greenery, because God has no dead. At one time, the church even tried to ban the tradition of decorating coffins with wreaths with inscriptions, but it was not easy to defeat it. Such a custom is caused not so much by greed or paganism as directed against vandalism, which, unfortunately, is often found in Russian cemeteries.

But you can and should refrain from drinking. The pain of loss is great, but you need to find other ways to deal with it. It is unlikely that the deceased will be pleased with such behavior. It is better not to spend money on alcohol, but to distribute it to the poor for a mention of the soul.

How to commemorate the deceased for a year after death at home

You can commemorate the anniversary of death at home. It happens that it is impossible to go to the cemetery due to various circumstances. Then it is necessary to invite everyone who wants to participate to prepare a special meal. Customs to put a device for the dead, to curtain mirrors are not Orthodox.

Before you sit down at the table, you need to pray. One of the relatives must read the 17th kathisma, or the rite of the memorial service. Candles are lit during prayer. Then you can start eating. It must pass with dignity, conversations must be decent, jokes and laughter are inappropriate.

Pagan meals for the dead were held with great pomp. It was believed that the more expensive and magnificent the funeral feast, the better it would be for the newly deceased behind the coffin. The funeral feasts were accompanied not only by copious libations, but also by dances, songs, and competitions. The meaning of Christian funerals and commemorations is quite different. They must maintain a prayerful memory of a person who is not even considered dead, but who has passed into another world.

Special dishes are served at the table. Be sure to include kutya. This is wheat porridge, which is sometimes replaced with rice. But its main feature is that it is prepared sweet, seasoned with raisins, other dried fruits, and honey. It is advisable to consecrate this food during the service. Sweetness symbolizes the joy that awaits the righteous in heaven.

Pancakes, which are usually washed down with jelly, are also a traditional funeral meal.

Table setting should be normal. You can put fresh spruce branches on the table, decorate the edges of the tablecloth with black lace.

Each change of dishes should be accompanied by a prayer: "God rest the soul of Your servant (name)." You should also pray after the meal. But thanking the hosts for the memorial meal is not customary.

When all the necessary prayers have been read, someone can also read verses on the anniversary of death. There are no church prohibitions in this regard. Poems should remind of the merits of the deceased, of his spiritual qualities. Of course, everyone has shortcomings, but Christians rely on God's mercy, try not to remember them, but pray that sins be forgiven.

It is customary to celebrate the year from the date of death not only in Russia. The dead are also commemorated in Asian countries. Japan, Vietnam, Korea and China have their own traditions. Followers of Judaism commemorate deceased parents, brothers, children. True, their anniversary date does not coincide with the generally accepted calendar. During the commemoration, it is customary to fast, meat and wine are prohibited.

How to honor the deceased yourself

What prayers are read at home on the anniversary of death to remember the deceased? The Psalter is best suited, the charter of reading is indicated in every Orthodox edition. In this case, special prayers go between the psalms, where the names of the deceased are mentioned. This is the most the best way. You can also read akathists, but the Psalms were written much earlier. Also all christian churches acknowledge their inspiration.

There are cases when the Church Charter prohibits the commemoration of the dead at the Liturgy, ordering requiem services for them, and holding a funeral service. This applies to those who were baptized, but did not go to church regularly, that is, they were not churched. A person who takes part in confession and Communion is considered to be churched, all the rest are considered "goers".

However, in practice, deviations are often made from this rule. It all depends on the ruling bishop. In any case, it is necessary to clarify this issue with the clergy.

It is also unequivocally forbidden on behalf of the Church to commemorate those who committed suicide voluntarily. If a person died in a war protecting others, it is not considered suicide. In general, death in war is one of the most honorable. But death from a drug overdose is a form of suicide.

However, the holy fathers teach us to hope for the mercy of God. It is allowed to pray for such people in private, there is even a special akathist for suicides, compiled in the last century. You can also add something from yourself, but you should not be too zealous either. We are unaware of all spiritual laws, such prayers can end in a mental disorder for someone who wants to do a good deed.

Why commemorate the dead

When a person has completed his earthly journey, he does not need a magnificent funeral, or an expensive coffin or a marble monument. Prayer is here main help that we can give to our departed loved ones. This is not just a tribute to tradition, but a saving thread that can bring a person to the Kingdom of God. It is especially important to pray in the first days when the soul goes through ordeals. But even after a year or two has passed, it is necessary to do this.