Since childhood, we are confronted with such a concept as discipline. From birth we are taught to it by parents, teachers at school, mentors in various sections or circles. But in the end, the moment comes when each person must begin to discipline himself. In some it occurs in childhood, in others a little later, and in some it never occurs. Sometimes a person who begins to wonder what is wrong with him in life should first of all pay attention to his self-discipline. This is the very necessary "tool", without which it is impossible to achieve success.

Self-discipline is about doing what you have to do, not what you feel like doing.

You get up at 6:00 am every day, or exercise regularly in the evening, do not eat dinner later than 6:00 pm, and after work do not watch TV. All of these seemingly insignificant actions allow you to control yourself, developing elements of self-discipline in your character.

Psychologists advise you to start everything gradually, understanding your actions and desires thoroughly. This is necessary in order to clearly understand why you are changing this or that habitual way of life.

You will need:

Accept yourself as you are

In order to start drastically changing your life, you need to understand how undisciplined you are, to decide at what stage you are now.

In no case should you judge or blame yourself for who you are.

This will only create unnecessary problems for you and all your complexes will once again emerge. Yes, on this moment you are so! But you want to change yourself, and discipline is quite possible to acquire with just a little effort.

Decide what you need it for

Surely, if you firmly decided to develop self-discipline in yourself, then this is not a momentary impulse, but a decision behind which something global is hidden and you really want to achieve this goal.

Of course, for some it may seem quite insignificant, for example, getting up early, but for you this is a serious obstacle that prevents you from moving towards your goal. But if you decide that your goal is really worth it to move towards it, then step over yourself and start waking up early. The main thing is to know why to do it!

Start simple

When starting to develop your discipline, don't set yourself too high expectations.

It is best to start with simpler tasks that will give you more confidence. You can start with. It is important to remember that getting used to everything happens slowly and gradually. On the subconscious mind, the brain resists any changes. And your actions from the series “Tomorrow I will be different” are absolutely a losing option, because in a couple of days all motivation will burn out. Everything is built on little things. And gradually changing everything that you are used to, in six months it will seem to you not so ordinary and comfortable. Since the base point will be completely different habits and needs.

Redefine your desires

It is very important when building a plan for self-discipline not to build it for a huge period. Better a little, but effective.

Having achieved a certain result, for a period predetermined by you, proceed to the next item of the plan. By the way, many people make a specific list where they indicate step by step what they want to achieve at the same time. You can do without it, but you need to know what you want and in what period of time you will achieve it. But the main thing is to move on.

Do not relax, reconsider your plans and desires, because often, on the way to achieving them, they can change, and you have to make more efforts.

Don't give up on your idea

It is common for a person to lose interest in many things.

This happens by itself or due to the influence of external factors. In this case external factor - this is an obstacle in the form of laziness and the work applied to achieve the set results It all depends on willpower. Monotony and struggle with oneself makes many people abandon their goals. Therefore, only a few, thanks to self-discipline, become successful. Try it, overwork yourself in this difficult period and then it will definitely become easier to move on. Don't give up, be consistent and rational.

When people come across the word "discipline," they resent it. Many went through their childhood trying to discipline them. Often those who resisted were exposed to cruel punishment... Parents tried to instill in us good qualityHowever, their methods were so unpleasant and brutal that everyone developed a negative attitude towards discipline - a quality that helps in achieving goals. And here the question arises, how to discipline yourself.

Why discipline problems arise

Let's start by defining discipline - what is it? This is a kind of self-restraint, which implies adherence to certain rules. A person takes a submissive position in relation to certain algorithms, rules, laws, etc. Discipline can be compared to law-abiding - when a person knows the laws and adheres to them, does not break. However, discipline does not always lead to punishment, especially when it comes to an adult.

Today the cult of freedom has become widespread. A person must be free. However, many people do not understand what this means. Many people understand by freedom the ability to do whatever they want. However, psychologists consider freedom the ability of a person to live to please his desires, to achieve them. Feel the difference between doing whatever comes into your head and making your wishes come true.

A natural question arises: why become disciplined? This quality, according to psychologists, helps in the realization of their desires. In other words, a disciplined person becomes successful, happy. He can achieve whatever he wants, and not just waste time trying to prove that he has freedom.


A disciplined person is a free person because he can have whatever he wants. The very people who avoid discipline, but shout about their freedom, are unhappy and limited.
They are not free from their freedom, while the disciplined person becomes free, achieving their goals through the use of discipline. What is discipline?
This is the observance of specific rules that help to achieve the goal. A person simply performs those actions that will lead him to the goal, and controls this process... This is self-discipline.

How to discipline yourself?

Let's take a step-by-step look at everything that needs to be done to cultivate self-discipline.

1. To love discipline and learn to perceive it as a great blessing. Exercises:

• Describe at least 10 examples of how discipline, self-discipline helps a person achieve his goal and the desired happiness!
• Write an essay on the topic "Discipline is my strength!" Believe me, such essays are incredibly helpful and very effective. The essay should be at least 1 page.

2. Build a powerful motivation for Self-Discipline. Exercises:

• Write in your workbook (not skimping on words and paper) at least 20 significant reasons - what do you need Discipline for?
• Describe (on paper) in colors, with examples and images - how will you, your personality, change when you cultivate self-discipline in yourself? (minimum 5 pages)
• Describe as vividly as possible - how will your life and destiny change when you discipline yourself? (minimum 5 pages)

3. Create the rhythms of life that discipline you! Something that will help you build the correct and effective rhythm. Sports, any sports section, helps very well in solving this problem. For example, you start visiting a fitness club, gym - 3 times in the morning (before work) and 3 times in the evening (on other days). Morning yoga, running, and more will help you. Also, they discipline martial arts well, I recommend.

Fill your life with other disciplinary activities as well. It's very good to start attending personal growth trainings, including discipline.

Learn to consciously manage yourself -master self-hypnosis and affirmations. To do this, read the relevant articles on the links. For instance:

• “I control myself, I subjugate mine inner world to their goals ”
• “I include activity, joy and strength to achieve my Goal”
• "I turn off, I burn out laziness and passivity"
• "I awaken the will, all the forces towards the goal"

Such commands of self-hypnosis switch your consciousness into an active mode of operation in order to turn off weakness and interfering manifestations, turn on the will, induce energy and start taking action.

5. Find yourself a good mentor, coach, coach who will help you develop self-discipline. According to statistics, 99% of all successful and great people had mentors and trainers. And the more rigid and demanding their teachers were, the faster they achieved their goals. Most of them speak about it.

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Sleep on schedule

Set the optimal time for yourself to get up in the morning and fall asleep in the evening. You know perfectly well what time you need to wake up in order to calmly get ready for work and be there on time. You also know how many hours of sleep you need to get enough sleep and feel good all day. Each person has it all individually, so make yourself a schedule that will be most convenient for you. And strictly follow it. It will be difficult only at first, then it will be very easy for you to follow these rules.

If you suddenly break the schedule, then punish yourself - no matter how ridiculous it may sound. The punishment can be anything - thirty push-ups from the floor, depriving yourself of your favorite cake, and so on. And of course, the less you violate the established framework, the easier it will be for you to comply with them in the future.

Sports activities

Any sport disciplines a person, if, of course, you take it seriously. Find a sport that you like and enroll in the appropriate section. You will be attending classes, for example, on Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 18.00 to 19.30. If you do not miss classes without a good reason, then adherence to this schedule will teach you to discipline in other areas of life.

You can also go in for sports on your own, for example, run in the morning for a certain amount of time or do a set of exercises. However, it will be somewhat more difficult to force yourself to do this regularly, since you know that no one will control you and will not scold you for poor results, besides, the money for a missed lesson will not be wasted, as is the case with visiting the section. In addition to developing discipline in oneself, playing sports carries another indisputable advantage - good health and a beautiful body.

Daily Schedule

Get yourself a small notebook or diary, where you write down all the important things that you need to do. And write them down in this format: task - approximate time to complete - priority. If you can accurately determine how long it will take you to complete each task, it will help you calculate how many tasks you can actually do in one day. The priority of the task must be determined in order to understand which task can be transferred to the next day in case of lack of time, and which cannot. For example, the shelf can be nailed down tomorrow, but today it is better to go to visit your grandmother, because you promised her a long time ago.

When it comes to work responsibilities, then consider not only the urgency of the task, but also the likelihood that you may have to redo or modify it.

And the last thing. Forget the phrases "I am a weak-willed person", "this is too difficult for me", "I am too lazy and will be lazy all my life." All these are just excuses for those who do not want to change anything in their lives. And if you repeat such phrases to yourself, then do not expect any internal motivation and will - they will not appear. Tell yourself that whatever you set out, you will succeed. And then you will see how the inner willpower will begin to fill you and it will not be difficult for you to maintain self-discipline.

It has long been known that motivation will not go far. In addition to the desire to start doing something, it is necessary to develop these beginnings. Here are some simple yet effective self-discipline building techniques in 21 days.

Start looking after yourself

For 21 days, watch yourself: what you are doing, how you stand, how you talk, what are you distracted by, how you walk and dress. Control yourself completely. Do not poke around, watch your posture, the position of your arms and legs. Notice the moments when you start to bloom. Even when you are alone, be collected.

It doesn't matter where you are - in the country, at work or in the gym - you need to look 100 percent and exude positive and confident. Build yours for comfort, stick with it.

The more you think about personal charm, the more you will have it. Imagine that every day you are under the gun of cameras and you cannot look bad, you need to be at your best all the time so that you do not blush in front of the audience.

A simple exercise for every day will help you learn to control yourself - the Marine stance. You come up to the wall, press against it with your heels, buttocks, shoulder blades, back of your head and elbows. In this position, you need to stand for at least 10 minutes daily. After a few days, you will notice that your back begins to straighten.

This small complex helps to develop, as you train yourself to control your behavior and not be slack. Remember, you are doing this for yourself, not for others.

Create a morning ritual

Our productivity and composure depend entirely on how we get up in the morning. You can hardly crawl out from under the covers after the eighth alarm clock and think only about how to quickly get back to bed at the end of the day. You can get up just before leaving the house, fussily gather, stuffing some sandwich into yourself, and jump out into the street, not understanding what is happening around and in your head. But it is best to prepare yourself in advance for, feel your biorhythm and breath of the new day.

You must come up with a morning ritual that will set you up for the start of a new day.

Here's a simple option: wake up at the first alarm, charge with a small physical activity, contrast shower, healthy breakfast, reading. Everything will take you about an hour. And 21 days is enough for it to become a habit.

Set yourself difficult tasks

Pick one at a time really difficult task a week and do each no matter what. Weather, circumstances, mood do not matter.

Doing 50 push-ups a day? Go to 80, 90 or even 100 - there is no limit. Writing one article in a couple of days? Write two. Are you spending a lot of money? in general, at least a few days. Weak?

If you have not calculated your forces and have chosen a task that you simply cannot cope with, imagine that this is an order, like in a war! You have to fulfill it, there is no other way.

Not in time for the day? Set aside other activities until you have done what you need to do.

This task is difficult, since you must not let yourself down in any case. When you complete it, you will be overwhelmed and confident that you can do a lot - if not everything - on your shoulder. After all, all the limitations are only in your head.

Focus on the result

This exercise is similar to the previous one, but here you choose a goal, make a plan, and calculate the time and resources needed to get it done.

Try to achieve something in 21 days: create a website, write a chapter of a book, lose 3 pounds, finish big project... Almost immediately you will realize that people, circumstances, mood, entertainment, the Internet and much more prevent you from meeting your deadlines. But don't be discouraged.

You should be on your goal, see it at the end of the path, think about it, not about distractions.

Use reminders from your smartphone or computer so you don't forget what you must do to achieve the result.

There is no need to proceed from existing possibilities: this way you, like most people, will never believe in yourself and will not begin to move towards success. Look into the future, pull it in.

Remember that shaping takes time and effort, but then they will lead you to your dream through any obstacles.

Usually, the development of self-discipline is compared to physical exercise - they say, by controlling yourself, setting new and new tasks before your will, you pump up the “muscle of self-discipline”.

This comparison is oversimplified (and in general, almost all comparisons and metaphors in relation to psychology work poorly, often leading to the wrong place). And - most importantly - it can lead to a misunderstanding of self-discipline.

Look: we pump muscles so that the muscles are strong. But we develop self-discipline in order to work more efficiently and. Strong muscles are a value in themselves (beauty + health + scaring away hooligans), pumped up self-discipline without work, where it can be applied, no one needs.

Second. We go from the opposite
Let things go with self-discipline. Not even that: forget about the fact that you need to develop self-discipline. Do what you want right now. Want to play? Play! Want to do nothing at all and stare at the TV? To your health! Go to bed at 5 am? As much as you like! If you are serious about the previous step, then you simply cannot be engaged in nonsense for a long time (otherwise you would not have read this ...). A person constantly strives for the meaning of life - however, this manifests itself in those moments when he owes nothing to anyone (and to himself). After a week or so of living without discipline at all, a real understanding of the meaninglessness and emptiness of such a life begins to mature.

(I recommend, however, to follow the "safety precautions". For example, ask a friend to talk to you about life in 10 days. Or set yourself a reminder in another way - come up with yourself what suits you best. And, of course, to those who want to find self-discipline in order to get rid of bad habits, this step will not help much)

Third. Elimination of interfering factors
You should not set yourself unbearable tasks and better use every opportunity to facilitate the achievement of self-discipline. As I already said, we do not need it on its own, for the sake of abstract self-development, but in order to achieve better results in work, business, and education.
Are you working on a computer? Create a special user (in Windows, start - control panel - accounts users), leaving a pristine desktop, removing the labels of toys, if possible, turn off the Internet, come up with complex (unmemorable) passwords for mail / ICQ and write them down on a piece of paper that you can hide away or give into custody to colleagues or relatives. Remove these colleagues and loved ones from the workplace so that they are not distracted by flickering and conversations.
Leave yourself alone with work. Give yourself no choice but to work.

(Of course, this tactic is also not applicable to everything)

Fourth. Develop habits
This is a very important, almost universal technique. A lot in our life is familiar, automated, and therefore it is performed without difficulty... Tell me, do you brush your teeth in the morning and in the evening? Does it require a strong-willed effort from you? I doubt it. The reason is that you developed this habit a long time ago.
Likewise, you can develop other habits according to what you want to achieve. If you need self-discipline in the plan healthy way life - then get used to doing exercises or chewing properly. If you want to develop it for the sake of effective work - develop a habit of not being distracted when you work.
An important rule: there is no point in developing multiple habits at once. Concentrate on one. Force yourself to do the right thing. We decided that it would be good to go to bed no later than eleven, which means that within a week or two you force yourself to bed. Usually 10-15 days is enough for the habit to develop. Gradually, you will have to make less and less effort in order to do what is necessary. And one day the habit will fit so well into your life that you will wonder how it could be otherwise.

Fifth. Build a rugged skeleton of the day
This "step" is related to the previous one. The bottom line is this: you develop not just useful and necessary habits, but the right habits tied to a certain time. For example, getting up and going to bed at a certain time, doing exercises, and so on. Attached to a certain time, the habit organizes and disciplines by itself, starting from it, doing what is needed much easier. Have some self-discipline anchor points throughout the day. Among other things, these pivot points will help you complete the minimum program once you achieve your goals.

Sixth. Maintain discipline and goal achievement
Also related to the previous one. Self-discipline, in particular, is manifested in the fact that a person can do his job, not paying attention to emotions. However, we are talking about "tricky methods", right? Therefore, we must try to make emotions our ally, not an enemy. To do this, try to work time control your mood. It is easier to achieve the desired, working mood if you use the skeleton of the day described above. For example, running early in the morning helps me a lot: you wake up instantly, thoughts run faster, purely physical joy and anticipation of a new day appear. Well, then it is important to "pick up" this attitude, not to lose it until the evening, when it should be replaced by pleasant fatigue and satisfaction from a well-lived day. Worthy of living - in particular, it means that there were no problems with self-discipline.

(Self-discipline itself can be a source positive emotions - a taste for an orderly life slowly appears, and it's just nice to know that you manage your time yourself, as much as possible for a person)

Seventh. Set goals and achieve them with self-discipline
It's pretty obvious. Self-discipline, although not musculature, still needs consistent pumping up. Set the desired, meaningful goal for you (yes, at least it’s right to sit at the computer!) And perceive it as a training for self-discipline - then achieving the goal will be much easier (you achieve it as if in passing). Later - new target... Repeat until pulse loss as much as necessary. You don't need to set global goals right away. Start small - even the smallest. If you think it's too easy, so much the better, you'll get it faster. Better underload than overload.

• Self-discipline is not an end, but a means. Do not overdo it. Sometimes the desire to put everything in order reaches the point of absurdity, and vice versa, interferes with work.
• Self-discipline is only one of the aspects of self-development of your personality. Important, but not the only one. And it should not run counter to your global goals, ideals and the meaning of life, on the contrary, it must be in harmony with all this. This principle is violated more often than one might think. Self-discipline is in vogue now. Therefore, trying to streamline their lives, people (unconsciously) often follow the fashion. For example, you can see posts on self-help blogs about how cool and important it is to get up at 5 am. And people begin to rip themselves out of bed with roosters, spitting on the natural characteristics of their bodies, not thinking whether this manifestation of self-discipline suits them personally. (The authors of such recommendations, of course, have little to blame for this - in THEIR case it can work great. Everyone is different - and the discipline is also different for everyone).
• You need to “let yourself loose” on a regular basis, you don't need to be too zealous with self-discipline. Approach her, as well as self-development in general, calmly, without fanaticism.

Basically everything, however - I repeat - this article is not exhaustive. After all, self-discipline is not only the ability not to be distracted by useless things and not to waste time in vain. Self-discipline also means:

- the ability to get your way, despite distractions
- the ability to control your thoughts, avoiding harmful and destructive
- the ability to fully concentrate on the problem
- the ability to work towards your goals without seeing immediate results

The list can be long. But I'd rather write about each point somehow.

I wish you successfully develop self-discipline and in general everything you need!

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