It is impossible to cry for the deceased person. The death of loved ones: Is it possible to cry on the mustache

And why are death afraid? All die. So many good people Already died that we were not sin in the grave to lie down.

Comfort and security changed us. Threshold of pain and sensitivity modern man very distinguishes us from our even the nearest ancestors, and there is nothing wrong with that, I myself admire a miracle every morning hot water And thank God for light and warm. But we are others. Protecting myself and securing your life, in some way we became more vulnerable, and sometimes defenseless. The fact of mortality - our and our loved ones - we are now transferred much harder and painful, rather than our great-grandfathers.

In an old man, a man since childhood was accustomed to the idea that he would have to bury parents. And young people knew that he would not just experience the loss of parents, but it was exactly to bury and make it nice and right. And there was still a wonderful word "to watch", and the dignity of children was estimated by how they console their dying loved ones, as they calm their fooling old age. Think: from childhood they prepared to this. Did not be afraid of children to scare or shock. How did you cook? They talked about death calmly, as something natural, not mitigating her tragicity, did not rotate themselves and children, did not hide from her. The old men collected themselves to death, they prepared shirts and scarves - what to put in the coffin, they were not afraid of communion, they were not afraid to write the wills and - we cried, of course, we cried - how without it? To whom the hunt to remove? So many things! So much work! But this crying was right, he was allowed in a special ritual, the rite - the grief was breathing, driving into the funeral customs and traditions.

And not only to the death of parents prepared from youth. Husband and wife - most likely someone will go to God earlier, and during the wedding people learned separation. Without keeping Togo, our ancestors committed their children to one of the most elegant spiritual exercises. The late Seneca, the mentor of the dying, advised his disciples: "We need to constantly think that mortals and we and our beloved" (letters 63.15). Think - constantly. Strip in memory mortal. Do not give bustle and failing to hide the tragicity of the world. But Seneca speaks not just about the memory of death in general, about the contemporary of the cosmic law. This contemplation specifically. The philosopher called for the change of the focus of "deadly contemplation". Believers often, sometimes - fair, reinforce in egoism. In contemplation of its finality, there really is something egocentric. But in the fact that I will die - there is no big tragedy. Sometimes death is waiting for how to get rid of the fumes. But - die loved by me. This is truly terrible. The world is full of pain, misfortunes, diseases, but be alive - it is so good.

When Sophokl is the mouth of one of his characters, says "the highest gift - unborn to be" (Oedip in Colon 1225), a listener and reader permeates the cosmic cold, goosebumps run on the skin, overcomes and paralyzes the noble metaphysical longing - to what is epic, deeply, beautiful! And only touching this ancient one, you begin to understand the lie of these words. Yes, to me, an exorbitantly aesthetic egoist, this phrase is suitable, but wouldn't I want to have my clear-eyed nephew, or fun brothers, my mother, my good and patient friends, would be good if they never Did not born? Yes, the world is full of pain, grief, losses, but these people - the decoration of mankind, together with them even in this sick world entered the meaning and joy, and through the mountain we still rejoice that someone nice stayed in this world even if even just a little. But how it hurts from the thought that one day they all have to die.

"A person begins with crying for the deceased." So the late Merab Markdashvili said. Without crying on itself a deceased or dying, a person begins, but with the adoption and overweight of his loved ones. This crying B. good families Committed from childhood - so that the person in the child woke up as early as possible, so that through the courageous making mortality of his and his loved ones from the first days of his life to learn how to bless this world, and to resist him. All our loved ones and friends, loved ones and good - these are people we will lose one day. And also - these are people who lose us.

However, "crying for deceased" is not just a beautiful image or sterile spiritual exercise. We have religion. She teaches us the right crying for the deceased, healing. When I was just beginning to serve as a priest, I was always embarrassed by our Belarusian funerals: "Professional" Pokalkers, the most complicated and diverse rituals, a special manifold bias and an upgrade manner to perform chants and the need for the verge of obsession "Adpix pacient" (pray for the late) "Yak Track" (as it should be). Then I realized how this war was important, these epic tears, "extra" rites.

This is Belarus. There was so much grief here. In war, Belarusians lost every fourth, and maybe transfer us all these troubles and helped the ability to bury, "as it should be". No need to flatter yourself: we are just people - no matter how many languages \u200b\u200byou would know what kind of refined literature did not read, grief and pain, tears and losses from us are human. And this pain should be able to smell, carry, scrub.

Death - always not on time. Death Causes us by surprise. And we need not only with the mind, but also skin itself to wear it grief. Even the last materialists, if they did not understand, they felt, inventing civilian memories and fresh minutes of silence. And in the church - smoke Cadyl, reading endless memorial notes, tables with offering and sealed land, and how they drink "with the saints," the whole church will pick up this scenario motive, and then it will be allowed to the courageous and tragic major of the eighth challenge - " He himself one is the immortal, coordinant and creative man. " We need to shout, we need to die, moisten through tears and grateful sadness. And intelligent of Russian women per minute of pain and loss could write:

I will be like shooting herbs,
Under the Kremlin Towers to swell.

Modern man, and, above all, a child, a teenager from all sides is fencing from death, from the very fact and mention. But one day he will have to hold his parents on the last path, and it should do it "as it follows." Religion has some cultural design of limit human experience. It gives not just a certain emotional antidote, an antidote from excessive shock, the consciousness of irreversibility, but the very fulfillment of the ritual is hurting sorrow, because we scream, we cry the God-man man, the comforter of orphans and suicide bonuses.

And he does not give us answers, as he did not persuade the inquisite I was, but only comforted - how? - We do not know neither we nor Job. Children who have grown in families without genuine religious tradition, are more vulnerable, they are defenseless before death, they are not involved in childhood to worry and understand death and loved ones, and their own. Our memorials, parents Saturdays, Grozny rites, Cute, notes and Sorokousts may seem unnecessary complication, unworthy of noble gospel truth. But is it worth refusing to refuse in the face of all our losses of the former and - certainly - future? And therefore, my suicide bumps, I will put more in Ladan and tighten the long and loud Belarusian memo, so that both alive, and the dead heard and comforted the ambulance-coming meeting.

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Previously, people treated death differently than at present. It was perceived as the inevitability and transitional stage when moving the soul into another world. It was not afraid to die and people quietly prepared funeral clothing and accessories. At the coffin of the deceased cried and did it sincerely and in accordance with traditions. A person who has experienced a loss of loved ones, does not think about the correctness or relevance of sobs, and does it from the soul.

But there is a version that it is impossible to cry on the crash, as it can damage his soul. Some consider these statements with superstitions and say goodbye to the deceased as it requires a soul. Crying the coffin of the deceased person - naturally, and in the overtance of the mountain, rarely, which person will be thinking about any superstitions. Mount covers the mind and does not allow to think about the consequences of sobs.

What is crying

As one of the wise men said: a person begins with crying for the deceased. This means that the child becomes an adult man. It binds to the establishment of consciousness, with the adulthy, to which the loss leads close man. The philosophers say that a person is becoming only then a conscious person, when he will experience a serious loss of the loss of a loved one and pays his coffin. A person cannot confront the series of events, because it will once lose people around him or they will lose it. They will have to cry, because feelings are very strong. The church establishes certain rules how to mourn the dead.

Why you can not cry

There is a huge number of theories, why it is impossible to cry. One of them is based on knowledge of thin worldwho gathered for centuries in grains. Esoterics say that the thin world is not a paradise and blood pressure in the classical representation, but a device consisting of several areas similar to layers, in each of which the souls of such people are collected. Each person in the fine world has its purpose and soul to execute it. When crying close soul is forced to interrupt their occupation and to be attached to the Earth. Crying man Call an egoist who does not want to let go of the soul of the deceased. Esoterics say that for the soul of the deceased there is a special purpose, only by completing which it will be able to return to the earthly world again.

The Orthodox Church adheres to a slightly different version, which is slightly similar to Esoteric, but is based on other principles. It is believed that the deceased person after death appears before the Lord to commit God's court. God defines where to send a soul of a neopled person and analyzes sins. The soul is in front of the Most High. The crying relatives distract the soul and do not want her to let go of God. Thus, relatives detain a thin shell of the deceased in the earthly world, where she suffers and suffers.

Supporters of these theories regarding crying on the mustache adhere to the opinion that prayer is considered the best farewell with the deceased. Pacific Mountain in prayer will help you to find peace in a different world. But the Russian man is inherent in the emotional manifestation of grief. It needs to be sprinkled and walk. Previously, in the villages even hired "Poskalkers", which asked a voice tone at the funeral. It was believed that the farewell should be accompanied by a crying and the sufferings of loved ones. The church allocated special days in which it is allowed to cry on the departed. They need to know and cry at certain days helps the souls of the dead calm down, feel the love of friends and relatives.

Not all people believe in such hypotheses and manifest their own grief individually. Crying at the funeral is natural and it is believed that the one who is not crying will not grieve and glad that the person went to another world.

IN difficult Minutes Tears approached, sometimes I want to literally burst out, so great emotional tension. Do I need to hold the tears in such a situation and try not to cry? It is not necessary! In this way, you can remove the nervous excitement and relax, and this is really not worth it, it is to enter into a depressive state, accompanied by a long grueling crying. We find out why it is impossible to cry a lot and how it can affect health.

How long crying is reflected in appearance

Each person, at least once weeding in life, familiar to the echoed face with swollen eyes. Tears are salted liquid and affect skin cover not as water, but as a concentrated saline solution. It is not surprising, therefore, the skin reacts to it redness, irritation and loss of aesthetic external view. Especially strong suffer from crying eyes. They scatter, eyelids become similar to tight stuffed bags. With a long crying, this condition is preserved for a long time, and if I had to cry a lot, say, before bedtime, you can find the outfit instead of wide open eye Two narrow slits.

Red-colored eyes do not serve the decoration of appearance, so with a rooting habit, it is constantly crying. There is a risk of losing your attractiveness. In turn, this factor entails new troubles - from discomfort and insecurity arises a depressive state, which is repeatedly manifested by constant crying and hysterics. Sometimes to break out of such a closed circle, the help of a qualified specialist is required.

Reflection crying on mood

Long crying is negatively reflected on the mood of a person. After a long sobbing, man feels exhaustion, its nervous system is in the extended state, it is not capable of any other emotions. Often, people fall into apathy, become indifferent to the events around them. Many have strong drowsiness. And if the cry became regular and quite ordinary things, then in this position a person is constantly, so it is not surprising that it is quite difficult to get out of such depression on its own.

Reflection of crying for health

Long crying negatively affects not only nervous system, but also on the whole organism as a whole. Scientists have proven that good positive setting It prolongs the life of a person and supports the work of its bodies at the proper level. When depressed and negative experiences, the protective resources of the body are dramatically reduced, immunity is weakened, and a person becomes more vulnerable to various viruses and bacteria.

There is also a risk of infection directly by organs of vision. During crying, we usually wipe your eyes or hand, or a nasal scarf, whose sterility, of course, do not think. Irritated inflamed eyes - a good channel to get infections into the body.

When a native or loved man is dying, tears flow involuntarily. Crying the soul itself, because it is live. To restrain tears per minute of grief is impossible. Death always cares us by surprise.

Jesus Christ himself was pretended when he received the news of the death of Lazar. Why did he cry if he knew that the soul was immortal? He saw how close to the deceased suffer, and I was sorrow. Jesus was pretended and showed to people to measure how to mourn away.

The Savior in a conversation with students compares death with a dream. He says that it goes to "wake up" Lazar. (Gospel from John). He had no reason to mourn the death of Lazar. For Jesus, resurrected a friend was just as simple as wake up from sleep.


For the dead can not cry, because the delicious tears harm health

Some people do not fully understand why it is impossible to cry for the deceased.

It is impossible to completely abandon tears in a difficult moment.

Mount loss should be deeply realized and survive.

Emotional experiences with tears are the normal reaction of the human psyche in a difficult loss.

But you need to mourn the deceased in moderation, so as not to harm yourself, not to him. It is impossible to exhaust yourself with suffering and cry for a long time.

Gorky tears appear from weak faith in the Lord, when those who lost close people forget that life native man With death did not end.

The man moved to another world, only the physical body died.

From tears you can die because they exacerbate chronic diseases

Is it possible to die from tears? Eavenly grind, which is expressed in tears and suffering leads to diseases by corporal and mental. Come back to ordinary life From such a state is difficult.

A person who has long suffered deeply after the death of close, flows into depression. He is exacerbated chronic diseases And new heavy ailments appear. Therefore, bring yourself to the frenzy and die from tears, it is quite possible.

Our separation with the dead temporary, on all the will of God

Immediately after death, the deceased more than in life need support for loved ones.

Death comes suddenly. People go to the world of others, did not have time to confess and repent. The unskilled sins are dead. But your destiny life Path It can no longer change. That's then relatives and loved ones provide him with prayer support.

Constantly mourning the deceased harms not only to you, but also to him.

The deceased is committed severe test.

He must keep the answer for every day, for each non-delegate act. And here they are still sobbing, instead of praying for him.

Recall the lines of the Bible:

(Matthew Gospel)

"Another one of the disciples said to him: Lord! Let me first go and bury my father. But Jesus told him: Go for me, and give the dead to burn our dead. "

Of course, here we are talking It is not about the fact that Jesus did not allow the disciple to bury the Father. Here the unbelieving people are "dead soul". The fact that you need to follow the Lord and believe that the dead do not die that our separation with them is temporary.

Those who do not believe that the soul lives after death physical body - Dead themselves.

Another important momentwho wants to emphasize from the given episode scripture. The student appeals to Jesus with a request, but the Lord refuses him.

You can never forget that on all the will of God. No hair falls from your head, without the will of the Lord on it.

When someone dies - and on this will of God.

Therefore, the death of loved ones should be taken with humility. Walking hard and suffer means to oppose the will of God. The rejection of the will of the Lord is sin.

(Matthew Gospel)

"So, do not be afraid of them, for there is nothing intimate, which would not have revealed, and the secret that would not be recognized. What I tell you in the dark, speak at the light; And what the ear hears, preach on the roof. And do not be afraid of killing the body, the souls who cannot kill themselves; And be afraid of anyone who can and the soul and the body will destroy in Gehen. Doesn't two small birds sell for Assary? And none of them falls to Earth without the will of your father; you and your hair on your head everyone is considered; Do not be afraid: you are better than many small birds. "

How to properly kill the dead on the last path

Some people are mistaken when they think that heartbreaking sobs at the funeral - proof of love for the deceased. The tradition loudly mourgeing the dead man came from paganism and not bezzling so far.

Orthodox Christian to accompany the deceased on the last path should be calm and restrained.

Release the deceased with love in the heart.

1. Pray for the soul of the dead man After the funeral and funeral. The first 40 days ignite the church candle and pray daily. You can do it in the temple, but you can and at home, as the heart tells. The main thing, pray sincerely.

After all, the soul, which recently left the body, is experiencing anxiety and fear. After the usual life in the human body, the soul does not know what is waiting ahead, where the Lord will determine. After death, a person gives an answer for all life, its further fate is determined.

2. ask Lord to forgive the late sins free and unwitting. Go to the Divine Liturgy to the Church.

IN orthodox church There are days to commemorate the departed - Parent Saturdays. In these special days, we remember the dead, pray for them, and thus we remind you of death that comes to all.

These days you need to pray to the Lord about all the dead people, not only about loved ones. This is such a tribute to the living dead.


3. Remember the deceased on the 3rd, 9th and 40th days.

Faoophan Removenik wrote:

"The deceased suddenly bother with a new life. Even the saints are still holding a mess. So far, it will destroy, it takes time more or less, judging by the degree of farewell and attachment to the earth. Tretystin, ninettes and frost indicate the degree of cleansing from the ecost. "

A commemoration is also arranged on the anniversary of death, alms is heard, a memorial service is ordered.

"Day of death better than day Birth "- wrote Blessed Jerome Stridonsky, and explained that his birth binds the freedom of soul to the body, and death relies her.

How can we help the departed

Orthodox priests are instructed to take care of their dead - Christian debt. The main concern is a diligent prayer for the rest of the soul and the forgiveness of sins. Install a solid prayer connection with the departed person, and survive the loss will be easier.

"The deceased need prayers as the poor in a piece of bread and a bowl of water."

(Saint Feofan Reasanizer).

No need to be desperate to suffer and pour tears. The despondency is one of the seven mortal sins, spiritual illness. Faith in gentlemen - best medicine From despondency.

Our Christian debt - with faith in the heart to take care of the grave of the deceased, remember him, order a memorial service, forty, read the psaltry, put in the candle temple.


It is useful to clean the soul, communion, confess, read the lives of the Saints of Elders. Do good deeds in memory of the dead close man, distribute alms. After all, there are so many living people who need help.

The best paneir is our virtuous life.

Give God forces to learn to live without a loved one, keeping a long, bright memory.

Why can't you cry for the dead?

    It is impossible to cry on the dead from the fact that the souls of the dead in by the Military World From this suffer. When a man is crying, he always thinks about the deceased, fools, wishes him to return. Spends a tremendous amount of energy into empty. And the soul of the deceased can not find peace.

    If we talk about crying about recently dead (up to 40 days), then it is fraught with the fact that the soul of the deceased may not go to another world (find new life Both body), and stuck here in the form of ghosts and suffer from it. Play for a long dead, no sense, the soul found a new life and body, in return for example an old and patient. He is good in this position and he is happy.

    Perhaps these glazes bring soul in a new life, suffering.

  • Cry for deceased

    it is impossible for a long time and strongly. Allegedly tears Heat Dead And he cannot go to another world.

    My aunt lost my son. For a very long time crying, for about 5 years it could not calm down, aged, and no persuasion did not act on it.

    That's all led such arguments that he was not comfortable there from tears, that tears Heat, that they are bothering it, etc.

  • Because it is believed that crying for the deceased and manifestation of love and pity to him adversely affects the soul of the dead man. Because of sorrow and longing the soul will not be able to leave this world and will be doomed to the eternal wanderings between the worlds.

    It says a lot of things .... March 4, 2014 my 6-year-old daughter chokes .... I go to church, but it's not easier for me, for all the time my angel did not dream ... You write not to cry, But there was no day that I did not remember her and tears themselves. I go to work, I communicate with people, laugh, but spiritual deep pain does not let go. Sometimes you forget, think that everything is fine, and sometimes you start roaring ...

    Yes, there is such a myth that it is impossible to cry for the dead people, because when a person died, his soul had already entered the road to another world, and when we pay, thereby calling it, and it causes great concern, it is impossible to interfere with the soul, She already has his way!

    We are because we are people! And because we love! Yes, the dead passes his business, we, alive, not concerning! But he was part of our life! After his departure, our life clearly changes, we ourselves in the state of the transition, and this is the whole of taki Ustov, sometimes tightly cemented. I died 45 days ago native brother-in 28 years old. I also cry, especially by the evening. But this is in more than Because he did not have anyone in the earthly standards, no family, no children nor a loved one! Sun was looking for something.

    do not cry hardly happen, but it is impossible to scream in any case. The soul is mastered in the new world and disturbing it - it means to hurt her evil, the soul is all hears and loud cries can scare it. I still heard that the first three days of the soul immersually browsing all the pictures of your life and, if you scream loudly, she could turn to see what happens and at that moment would miss some important event, it will forever disappear from her experience, imagine if there there was something very important, the first love, the birth of children and the soul it will forget - this is not fortunate