All the people in our life are not accidental, acquaintance with them was in the plans of God. No person comes into your life by accident.

So, why do we feel joy next to some people, annoyance with others, attraction with others, longing with others? What causes such different emotions?

Because each of those whom we meet on our way came for a reason. He came to help us. And each carries its own task and emotion for us.

The point is that we are one organism. Humanity. I wasn't the first to tell you about this. This is the basis of many philosophical worldviews.

And we attract to ourselves those “cells” of a single human organism that we need. Of course, a single human organism is controlled from above, you can call it God, but for the convenience of the theory about the organism, let's say - the Unified Brain.

The organism itself is not aware of this control. Just like our body is not aware of how it breathes and how it digests food. This is controlled by the brain. So in a single humanity, where each of us is a “cell”, we do not understand why and how events occur, but the Brain knows exactly what it is doing.

Sometimes these people "treat" the hurt. Sometimes with love. It all depends on the "disease". The most painful in treatment are stuck in illusions and pride. These two diagnoses call into our lives people who begin to destroy our attitudes, principles, outlook on life. It's very painful. The man begins to grumble: “What do I need all this for? What have I done? Why me?" But if you understand the whole process as a whole, pain can be avoided. If you treat with gratitude those who came to “treat” you, the “treatment” will be faster and more efficient.

So, if in your life appeared: aggressors, people with opposite views on life, and with an active life position, i.e. they will not be silent, people who interfere with your progress, humiliate you, educate you, etc. - you are ill with pride. Doctors have been sent to you. And you should not think that "doctors" are pleased with their "work". They do it unconsciously, sometimes genuinely wondering why you are so unpleasant to them.

Pride is cured by acceptance. By the way, I, as a person with great experience in terms of pride, can say that acceptance even the best medicine than forgiveness. I recently released a course half of which is devoted to the practices of acceptance, and they work just amazing! Moreover, all you need to do is listen to meditations.

Don't forget that you, in turn, are other people's doctors too. These are our common lessons.

The second painful lesson, as I said, is illusion. We are accustomed to consider life as we imagine it to be. Those. in fact, we are starting to get out of common organism, build a special, fantastic world around you. That's how cancer cells behave, by the way. The One Brain will be forced to try and bring you back to reality. Initially, it was conceived as a state of freedom and love. But we stay in it only in infancy. Then we begin to actively invent non-existent worlds.

As soon as you have invented an illusion for yourself, people are sent to you who are able to destroy it. For example, you read novels and believed that people should be faithful friend friend. Moreover, they believed so strongly that do not imagine a relationship where at least a shadow of betrayal could flash by. Everything. A "landing force" of traitors has already been sent to you. They will "teach" you until you understand. Everything happens in life. Life cannot be limited. Relationships are part of development. Everything can be forgiven. And so it is with any illusion if it becomes vital to you. If without it you cannot imagine happiness.

Of course, everyone would like to be joyful, rich and healthy. But if these qualities are too significant for you, “doctors” will come and destroy your illusions.

Because the world is unpredictable. It is based on freedom of choice and therefore changes constantly. Freedom of choice is not only yours. You must respect the freedom of choice of each individual. And this means not to experience negative emotions when the other person chooses to act this way and not otherwise. He has a right to it. And they will also send "doctors" to him.

And these endless treatments will continue for as long as it takes for you to understand - you are being looked after. You are helping to grow the one body of humanity. Grow and develop. You are a cell of a single organism in which everything is going right, despite the fact that you, the cell, think that you could arrange everything much better. Despite the fact that you, a cell that does not see the whole organism and does not suspect how it works, it seems that you could become different, better, bigger, stronger ... Until you realize that you are already perfection. That you are in the right place. That all you need to do is follow your heart, consider those around you, and love everything around you, because that's what reality is. When you learn this, then such a desired prosperity will come.

The people who are "sent" to us are of several kinds.

1. directly doctor. Ambulance. It is called in emergency cases when a person does not hear either intuition, or signals from outside, or the heart, when he is immersed in his illusions so much that he can only be pulled out with a "hit on the head." In general, they call an ambulance. Most of the world's population prefers this method of treatment, alas.

2. castle man. A person suddenly appears beside you, whom you cannot guess. It is not clear to you, but it is interesting. He is not always cute, it happens that the man-castle is annoying. You are trying with all your might to find the key to him, to understand his motives, his thoughts. Such people are sent to us when the time has come for spiritual growth, new relationships, new achievements. It's time to step outside the boundaries of your own world.

3. key man. These are the people next to whom you open new horizons in yourself. You suddenly discover that, it turns out, you are not shy about singing loudly in the street. That you can think outside the box. That you have goals and dreams. That you, it turns out, know how to be brave (cowardly, aggressive, etc. - it doesn’t matter what exactly you discover, the main thing is that it’s new for you). Such people are sent to us when the time has come to know ourselves more deeply.

4. Alarm clock man. People of high spiritual level. Not necessarily gurus or saints. But these are high vibrating people. Next to them you feel out of place. You then get lost, as in front of a teacher at school. Either you feel good next to him, then he starts to annoy. And the longer you are near the "alarm clock", the more transformations are launched in your personality. Insights dawn on you. You suddenly understand something you thought you always knew—in a new way. You change your attitude to ordinary things. You start to see things differently. You wake up. And not always the “alarm clock” does something for this. He might just live next door. But more often "alarm clocks" are those.

I hope you find my thoughts helpful. Please share your impressions in the comments.

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We came to the conclusion that Networking is needed not only for, but also for ordinary people. In short, Networking helps to get out of the “comfort zone”, that is, it helps to change your life. Why change life? At a certain stage of his life, a person understands (maybe he does not understand or does not try to understand) that something needs to be changed in life (to change his place of work, change his place of study or come to a new relationship). It is impossible to change something in life if you do not take concrete actions aimed at changing your life. In some cases, people or a person appear in your life who behind the scenes help change your life. The most important thing to understand is that this particular person did not just meet on your life path, namely for the fact that it was you who made the decision. In general, there is nothing in our world, since a person on the planet is a unit of the whole (world, universe). I will not go into the order of the universe in detail now, since this is a completely different topic.
V Everyday life we have a certain circle (acquaintances, friends, colleagues) with whom we communicate on certain topics. In the process of communication, close social connections, which in some way are a minus. If you ask what is the minus of close social ties, then there really is a minus. Yes, close social ties create a comfortable environment for communication, since no one will point out your disadvantages, since no one will show you something you need to move forward. It is close social ties that do not allow us to develop in a particular area, and also do not allow us to establish. So, here Networkkin just allows you to establish new social connections. Networking is the art of establishing, maintaining and developing social connections in order to achieve a particular goal.
So, when a new person appears in your life, it is important to understand what exactly this person came to in order for your life to change. On my own new person is not able to change a person's life (if only purposefully), but is able to influence a person. This can manifest itself in some actions, deeds. For example, by chance (most likely not by chance) you had newer acquaintance. New relationships (new acquaintances) are always an exchange of people's internal energy, as people influence each other with their energy. Relationships can be friendly or flirtatious, so it doesn't matter how serious the relationship is.
The main thing is to understand that a person appeared in your life not just like that, but for something. For what? In order to understand through communication or specific actions of a “new friend” what is to a particular problem or to change your attitude to life. Only " new friend” may indicate (directly or indirectly) that you don’t need to live like that, that is, you don’t live your life. However, all this is not easy to recognize that a new person is given to change your life. Why? Yes, because the appearance of a new person with a different outlook on life, with a different temperament, with a different character, with a different energy, just brings discomfort when communicating. With established views on life, a different opinion on your own life is very difficult to perceive objectively. In fact, if you want to impose other views on life, a person perceives it very critically, since he is “in the comfort zone”.

If we talk about the “Comfort Zone”, then this is the usual state (place of work, or personal life) in which a person is. Perhaps he is not satisfied with the state of life that he has, but he does not want to leave the “Comfort Zone”. So, here, the appearance of a new person in your life can cause different emotions in the process of communication, including irritation, anger, despondency, or vice versa, a feeling of delight. Such a variety of negative emotions arise because a person is closed to something new, that is, to change his life. Thus, it is important to read the signs (for example, the appearance of new people in life) that tell you that you need to change something in life.

. Usually we do not pay attention to the number of lonely people, until we ourselves somehow suddenly fall into their number. So you lived, you lived, you didn’t grieve, and all the time someone surrounded you: either parents, then children, friends, acquaintances, loved ones ... And suddenly ...
How long can you live without communication? All alone? Hour? Two? Day? a week? So that it doesn’t burden you, doesn’t press down and doesn’t make you unhappy ... I can’t stand it for long ..

It's strange: when there is someone next to you, you somehow see everything around you differently, you feel, you feel ... And the snow seems somehow special to you, and the rain does not wet, and the wind invigorates ... And when no one - even the sun does not please ... And dark spots on it they become somehow blatantly ugly, and the head hurts, and the heart aches, and the mood does not rise above zero ...

Why do we definitely need someone to brighten up these agonizing moments of inner turmoil and fill our lives with meaning? Why can't we deal with our own conditions? After all, according to by and large The world is our ideas about it. Change your perceptions and change the world!

I change them, change them! Only for some reason I definitely need a witness who would record these changes, or just be present at the same time ... Why?

I don't know why! Needed and all! Without it, somehow everything is dull and gray, and I don’t need it at all. Lazy what? How can you cook a three-course meal when you're alone and there's a sausage and a glass of yogurt in the fridge? You'll get another crust of bread, and that's it, sweet deal. Why strain, cook, fry, soar. Grabbed something on hastily and ready for work and defense.

Another thing is if someone is nearby. Then God himself ordered to cook something delicious. You can cook borscht or fry cutlets. To please and rejoice in the joint eating of some delicacy.

So it is in life. This “someone” is needed to cook something, strain, bungle out of your own life, because he is a witness, he can appreciate, he can share joy and sadness with you, if necessary. From his participation, sadness becomes less, and joy more. Haven't tried? Yes, you all know that! And of course, internally, do not be proud of your loneliness at all, if it happens to you sometimes.

But it is also not worth falling into panic and hibernation, giving up on yourself and indulging in despondency about your imperfection. Because the point here is not perfection, but the fact that during this period of your life you need loneliness! “The council is destined in the highest ...” But why do you need it now - figure it out for yourself!

Maybe you should learn to be yourself. Or maybe they would know how to appreciate others, and would not scatter real feelings and friends. Surely, it was given to you for self-improvement and introspection. Dig deeper, and suddenly you will find a treasure in your soul that you didn’t even suspect about, carried away by the pursuit of imaginary values ​​...

To find something, you have to lose something. You can't really say. What do you miss the most in life? Right now there is a chance to understand it. Just don't rush. Hurry up - make yourself laugh ...

We are in such a hurry back to the state of “with someone”, we are so afraid of uncertainty and inconsistency with the general statistical standards of life, where someone should always be next to us, dear and warm, that we are ready to take for him any more or less identifiable for "his". similar and recognizable.

Only before we have time to fill a new salt shaker to comprehend our soul mate, we suddenly realize that this is not a soul mate at all. And a joint pood of salt, which we definitely need to eat with her, we simply can not master.

And we also love to flip. We brush aside any connections that are inappropriate for us, without even bothering to taste them. We came up with ideals for ourselves and rush about with them, as with a hand-written sack. But ideals, in principle, do not exist, because we are all living people, and nothing human is alien to us!

Any person who comes into our life is necessary for us for something. And accepting his presence in our lives with gratitude, we will learn to understand why he came. Perhaps to bring us joy or self-confidence, information or a lesson, to help or hinder us, to strengthen our character and develop our soul, or maybe to test our strength and try to destroy us? Understand! To do this, you have a head and a heart, a body and intuition. But in any case, this gift must be accepted from life with gratitude.

We buy into our fears and fall into our own traps. And we think, proud people, that we learn from the mistakes of others. In fact, a person can learn something only by stepping on his own rake.

Other gardeners - lovers of such rakes in the same enviably constant version will have to test more than a dozen on their cast-iron forehead until they reach them true meaning events happening to them.

And if I free my speech from allegories and say it easier, then in order to reduce trauma in such an important and necessary matter for every person as the search for “someone”, you need to follow just a few simple rules:

1. Be yourself.

2. Don't rush.

3. Be grateful to life for what it gives him at the moment.

That's all! It seems that it is so simple, even elementary, banal and known to everyone. And try to put it into practice! How many reservations, conditions, various obstacles will immediately creep out in abundance from various cracks in order to complicate everything, ruin and trivialize everything.

And yet I will try. After all, no one can do it for me. And if there is no one next to me now, it means that I have not yet learned to put into practice these elementary rules of life ...

I know that you are somewhere, my only, dearest little man in the world. I'm coming to you, I'm waiting for you. For a long time. Patiently going through the rosary of events and dates, faces and touches. Looking into the trembling space of our invisible interaction, saturating it with the bright thirst for our connection, I am filled with confidence and love. And I burn like a star in the sky. To make it easier for you to see me. And you're still gone and gone... Where are you, my sun?

I think all of us know the expression “there are no random people in our life”.
And everyone has heard more than once that “the other person reflects us ourselves.”

But few of us understand the meaning of these words and their deep meaning.

Each person has several different parts of him, often very contradictory.
All these parts that are in the depths of our unconscious, as a rule, we do not notice, and we are not aware of the influence of these parts on our life in reality.
A person very often does not even understand and, moreover, is not aware of the influence and presence of these parts within himself.

Other people who come into our lives, with whom we have close relationships, reflect precisely our hidden parts within us, so the expression is very true; "There are no random people in our life."

But due to the fact that we are not aware of their presence within us, the behavior and actions of other people seem alien to us.

One woman who came to me for a consultation complained about the betrayal of a close friend. She told in detail how a friend just simply used their friendship for her own selfish purposes.
From my client's point of view, she treated her friend very well, with open heart and she did not understand how she could do this to her.
In the course of our work, we found inside her an unconscious part very similar to this friend.
This part of her also tried to find people beneficial for her life and business, and this part also tried to use other people for her own purposes in the same way.
Yes, my client may have been very sincere towards her friend, but her friend was her own part inside her.

Another client of mine wanted children very badly, but could not get pregnant, and then she married a man who, for physiological reasons, could not have children.
Her husband was an exact copy of her unconsciously repressed part, which did not want to have children or could not, for reasons known only to her.
Her husband was a reflection of that hidden unconscious part of her that did not want to have children.

A client who really wanted to get married and was very upset because the man who was next to her was not eager to start a family and was very closed emotionally.
When working with her, it later became clear that in the depths of her unconscious there was a part very similar to this man, and she could manifest with completely different men.

A young meek lady, who at first glance has great patience, complains that her husband treats her very rudely, allows rude words and phrases in relation to her.
At further work it turned out with her that inside her there was no less anger and aggression than her husband.

A young woman at the age of 25 converted to Islam with all the prescribed customs, she turned about her husband's infidelities, in the course of working with her it turned out that the adoption of Islam was a way to suppress her sexual desires in relation to other men.

From all these examples, only one thing follows, that the people who come into our lives are our inner parts and do not come into our lives by chance.

It is not easy or difficult to accept this fact, because we cannot see these parts and very often we do not even feel them.
They live in the depths of the unconscious, creating reality and attracting the right people into our lives.
Each person who comes into our life is not accidental.
By studying the people who came into our lives, you can get a lot of information about yourself and about your deep life.

You can study to know yourself not only in the psychologist's office, you can study yourself by observing the attitude and behavior of people close and significant to us.

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We meet people not by chance. There is always some reason why someone comes into our life and leaves it. And the hardest thing to realize is that some people are destined to be with us only for a little while.

The people who come and go quickly from our lives are usually the ones who open us up to new opportunities and ways to grow and develop.

We don't want to let these people go because we start to get used to them. But we do not understand that some people are destined to be temporary in our lives, no matter how much we would like the opposite.

“Not everything has to become something beautiful and durable. Some people come into your life to show you what is right and wrong, to show you who you can be, to teach you how to love yourself, to make you feel better, or just to be someone you can hang out with at night and pour out your soul. Not everyone will stay forever, but we must keep going and be grateful to them for what they have given us.”, - Writer Emery Allen.

I remember my brightest acquaintances and now I understand why each person came into my life, and how he influenced who I am today. I have shared my deepest thoughts, fears, secrets and dreams with people who are no longer in my life. I do not regret it, because at that moment it was exactly what I wanted to do.

I always thought it was amazing that our lives intersect with the lives of so many people, and even if you know someone for only a short time, you can influence his life and his story. To look at all this from this point of view is very exciting.

The sooner we understand that not everyone is destined to be a part of our lives, the easier it will be for us to plunge into new relationships and appreciate the time with certain person letting him go when the time is right. We need to make the most of the time we have with each other and focus on the present. Let go of expectations, assumptions, and saturate yourself with as much communication with people as possible.

“I see a lot of people in non-stimulating relationships — not just between guys and girls. Many find themselves in stagnant friendships. If people were less afraid of finishing something, they would get more out of life ... You meet right person at the right time and it fills something in your life. You fill something into it. But there is a limit to this,” singer Laura Marling.

If you lose someone in your life, don't lose yourself.

Always remember that just because some people are temporary in your life, it doesn't make your memories and experiences with them any less important.