One day, American President Richard Nixon got into trouble. Speaking in Brazil, he habitually raised his hand with a ring connected by his thumb and forefinger. For him, as for any American, this gesture meant "okay." And for the Brazilians - as it soon became clear - sexual assault.
Very few gestures have universal meaning. These are mostly involuntary gestures that reflect our emotions and are not only common to all humans, but also unite us with primates. For example, gorillas, like humans, cover their faces with their hands when they are upset, beat their chest to show their confidence, and throw their hands up when they are very worried. In almost all cultures, the person who shrugs their shoulders demonstrates insecurity, indifference, or disregard, and the person who holds his nose with his hand reports unpleasant odor... Bow (head or body) is a universal expression of respect across all cultures. However, along with the universal gestures that are unmistakably readable by representatives of most cultures, there are many gestures that in different cultures have completely different (sometimes directly opposite) meanings. And similar meanings, on the contrary, are conveyed by different gestures.
The difficulties of understanding sign language are well illustrated by a children's anecdote. A cowboy and an Indian meet. The Indian pokes his index finger in the cowboy's face, and he points at him with two. To which the Indian folds his arms into a house, and the cowboy, in response, draws a wavy line in the air with his hand. Returning home, both retell the conversation that took place. Cowboy: “I just met a very warlike Indian. He says:“ I will gouge your eye out. ”And I answer him:“ And I will both bury you. ” drown "". And the Indian retells the dialogue as follows: “I just met a crazy cowboy. I ask him:“ Who are you? ”He answers:“ Goat. ”I ask:“ Mountain? ”And he answers:“ No, waterfowl. ”
Misunderstanding of gestures common to representatives of other cultures often leads to misunderstandings, resentments and even conflicts. This is how they gesture in the same cases different nations.

Indication

The first meaningful gesture that an infant learns, who is not yet able to walk or speak, is an instruction. Stretching out his hand in the direction of the object that interested him, he tells the adult: "I want it." And an adult, reading the meaning of the gesture, hands him a toy or a bottle of food. The pointing gesture is found in almost all cultures, but among many peoples, like among the Russians, it is considered indecent to point a finger. In most Western cultures, pointing a finger at a person is disrespectful and demonstrating one's own superiority. Hindus point their fingers only at the subordinates, and to point to the person who is higher than them on the social ladder, they use the movement of the chin. Indians make a neutral pointing gesture with the whole palm and resembles Lenin's pose on numerous monuments: "You are going the right way, comrades!"
In Indonesia, not used to indicate forefinger, but large, and Filipinos indicate the object with their eyes and elongated lips. Such a pointing gesture, which is unusual for us, is also quite widespread among American Indians and some African peoples.

Beckoning
The usual "alluring" gesture for us, when the hand is raised to the level of the chest, the fingers are directed up and make swaying movements towards themselves, can be read by some peoples, for example, the Arabs, in the exact opposite sense - as a demand to leave. To call someone, the Arabs (and the Spaniards and Latin Americans who adopted this gesture from them) turn their hand palm down and move their fingers as if they were digging the earth. Similarly, people in Japan, China and Hong Kong are called. True, there you can also see a person who beckons someone with his index finger. But you can be sure that a person will never respond to such a call, since this gesture is intended only for animals.
In order to call the waiter, there are also specific gestures in different countries. For example, the British and Americans, beckoning the waiter, portray a whole pantomime in the air with both hands, as if they were signing a bill. And in France it is enough to throw your head back and say: "Monsieur!" In Colombia and other Latin American countries, they sometimes clap their hands over their heads to call the waiter, but this gesture is considered a manifestation of dissatisfaction.

Greetings
The handshake has become a traditional greeting in many regions of the world. In the USA and in many countries Western Europe this gesture is used equally by men and women. However, in countries where emancipation has not gone too far (for example, in Latin America), it is not customary for a man to be the first to extend his hand to a woman. In China and Japan, a handshake is accepted only among partners of equal social status, and higher ones are often greeted with a polite bow. And in some parts of Mexico, it is common to shake hands and grab a partner's thumb.
Exalted Southern Europeans (Italians, French, Belgians) use a kiss three times as a greeting. At the same time, for some reason, many of them are sure that the same greeting is accepted by the Russians. Foreigners are very surprised when they are explained that Russians have a threefold kiss with a religious meaning and are performed once a year - on Easter.
In India, the traditional welcome gesture is still common - hands folded together, fingers up (as in prayer). In the Philippines, people greet each other with a slight lift of their eyebrows. A native of Tibet, meeting a stranger, shows him his tongue. With this sign, he wants to say: "I have nothing wrong on my mind."

Approval, admiration
If you are accustomed to using the thumbs up to express admiration, then in many countries you run the risk of being misunderstood. In the Middle East (for example, in Iran) this gesture is considered obscene.
In Spain, Mexico and Colombia, to express admiration, they pinch the earlobe with two fingers. This gesture is commonly used to praise the hostess for a delicious meal. To express extreme delight, Brazilians can even throw their hand behind their head and reach the opposite ear.
When a Frenchman wants to say about something that this is the height of sophistication and sophistication, he, joining the tips of three fingers, brings them to his lips and, raising his chin high, sends a kiss. And the Chinese, expressing satisfaction, simply bring their hand to their lips.
The Turks have a unique gesture of approval: they raise their hand up and slowly fold their fingers into a fist, as if squeezing something.
The famous American gesture "okay" (a ring formed by the thumb and forefinger), which means "everything is in order, everything is good", can also be attributed to the gestures of approval. In other cultures, it can have a completely different meaning. In France, it means "zero", "nothing came of it", in Japan it symbolizes money and is used in a purchase and sale situation (for example, as a request to the cashier to give you change in coins). In Spain, Greece and South America this gesture has a sexually offensive connotation, as exemplified in the above story with Richard Nixon.

Gratitude
In Ceylon, gratitude is often expressed with a simple smile, but smiling too often can be understood as sexual flirting. The Chinese gesture meaning "thank you" is hands raised to the level of the head, folded in a handshake (we have a similar gesture meaning "friendship" or "agreed!").
In different regions of China, there are different gestures meaning gratitude for the good service in the restaurant. In North China, “thank you” is denoted by the thumb and forefinger folded into a ring (unlike the “okay” gesture, the hand is not raised up, but rests on the table). In South China, fingers are tapped on the table as a token of gratitude, which is reminiscent of the European involuntary gesture of nervousness and excitement.
The meaning of this gesture dates back to the time of Emperor Qian Lun of the Qing Dynasty. The emperor once traveled incognito in southern China with his courtiers. In order not to be recognized, the emperor was dressed in a simple dress and served his courtiers over tea. And those, in order to secretly express respect and gratitude to the emperor, invented a gesture depicting endless bows with their fingers.

Flirting, flirting
Gestures that signify admiration for female beauty are considered immodest in all cultures. But if in Europe women quite favorably endure all sorts of whistling, winking, snapping fingers and blowing kisses sent to them, then in Asian countries for such enthusiasm you can get it in the face. It is also useful for young ladies to be able to distinguish between simple flirtation and dirty sexual innuendo. In France, a crude sexual gesture is the snapping of the fingers of both hands at the same time and the slap of the palm of one hand on the clenched fist of the other. In Greece, sexual harassment is expressed by tapping a finger on the chin, winking, whistling, and blowing kisses. In Argentina, a man makes an indecent proposal to a woman by tapping on inside thighs, and in Egypt - tapping each other with the tips of the index fingers.

Insult
In most cultures, offensive gestures are phallic. A raised fist (for example, Pakistan), a thumb (Iran), an index finger, or an elbow with a clenched fist (China) are considered offensive in many cultures. But there are also purely national insults. In England, the V (Victory) sign is considered offensive if it is not made with the palm out, but with the palm to the face. Apparently, the British adopted this gesture from the Arabs, who lift the tip of the nose with two fingers, imitating the movements of the phallus. The crudest sexual insult among Americans is a fist with a raised middle finger.
The Greeks, on the contrary, wanting to offend a person, put their thumb down. Usually this gesture is used by drivers who express with its help something like "Where are you going, you moron! Don't you see, I'm going!" In our country, this gesture is common among young people and means "sucks", that is, "bad".
In Greece, there is another gesture that has an offensive meaning. It consists in extending the hand, palm forward, with fingers outstretched - much like we do when we want to ask someone to shut up. This gesture dates back to the times of antiquity, when the faces of defeated enemies were stained with mud. A similar offensive gesture exists in Nigeria. And in Chile, this gesture has a more specific meaning and means "Moron!" IN Saudi Arabia a more complex version of this gesture is used, when the hand with extended fingers is parallel to the ground, and the index finger is pointing down.
If in Russia the fig refers mainly to childish offensive gestures (like the protruding tongue), then among many peoples (for example, the Turks, Hispanics, the inhabitants of the Mediterranean) this gesture is a fatal insult, since it has a phallic meaning. For the Brazilians, on the contrary, it means a wish for good luck. And in Paraguay, an insult is a gesture that in the United States means a wish for good luck: crossed index and middle fingers. Probably, such an inversion of positive and negative meanings is not accidental: in Russia, the ritual of wishing good luck also consists of phrases, the literal meaning of which is far from benevolent (No fluff, no feather! - Go to hell!).
Westerners may offend Arabs with their habit of sitting cross-legged, especially in the American manner - "the number four" (the shin of one leg rests on the thigh of the other). This is due to the fact that in the Middle East it is considered an insult to show others the soles of your shoes. By the way, the American way of crossing the legs cost the lives of several spies during the Second World War, which, thanks to this gesture, not typical for Europeans, were exposed by German counterintelligence.
In India, it is considered a terrible insult to step on someone's foot (even by accident). In Thailand, a person may be offended if you put your hand on the back of the chair on which he is sitting, and in Japan if you hold out to him business card with one hand, not two (you should also take the thing outstretched to you with two hands and with a slight bow).
In addition to simply offensive gestures, there are ways in many cultures to express more specific accusations.
Drunk. To warn that a person is drunk, the French put their thumb and forefinger into a ring and "put" this ring on their nose. The Dutch in a similar situation tap the nose with their index finger.
Chatterbox. To show that they are tired of someone's pointless chatter, the French make a gesture that imitates playing an imaginary flute. In Latin America and the Middle East, brush movements depicting the opening of the mouth are used to convey the meaning of "talker", "yap".
Greedy. To show that a person is greedy, in Colombia, the fingers of one hand are struck on the inside of the elbow of the other.
Liar. A specific gesture for depicting lies exists in Israel. When an Israelite taps the open palm of the other with the index finger of one hand, he says, "More grass grows in my palm than I believe your words." In France, the index finger at the lower eyelid means "a lie" or "I am considered a liar."
Homosexual. In the Middle East, a person's non-standard sexual orientation is reported in the following way: they lick their little finger and comb their eyebrows with it. Among Italians, a similar meaning is conveyed by pinching the earlobe. In Spain, there is an insulting gesture with a similar meaning, meaning also "girl" or "sucker": the head is tilted to one side, the cheek rests on the palm (imitation of the pose of a sleeping child).

Mind and stupidity
Gestures depicting intelligence and stupidity often have opposite meanings across cultures. For example, when a French, German, or Italian thinks an idea is stupid, he emphatically knocks himself on the head. A German slap on the forehead with an open palm is equivalent to the exclamation: "You're out of your mind!" And when a Briton or a Spaniard knocks himself on the forehead, on the contrary, he is pleased with himself. Despite the fact that there is some self-irony in this gesture, the person still praises himself for his quick wits: "This is the mind!"
Germans, Americans, French and Italians have a habit of drawing a spiral at the head with their index finger, which means "crazy idea ..."
The gesture "finger to the temple" among the Germans and Austrians means "crazy!", And in a number of African cultures this gesture means that a person is deep in thought. In France, a finger at a temple means that a person is just a fool, and in Holland, on the contrary, that he is smart or said a smart thing.
Especially confusing is the designation of the intellectual level of the interlocutor in modern Israel. In the "official", generally accepted in the country, sign language to put a finger to the temple means to praise someone for a clever idea. At the same time, many ethnic groups inhabiting Israel perceive this gesture differently. For Moroccan Jews, as well as for the French, it means “stupidity,” for American Jews, “you’re out of your mind,” and for people from Romania, “I think” or “think.”

Affirmation and denial
Those who are accustomed to understanding head downward movement as "yes" and from side to side as "no" will face many difficulties in the Middle East. In Saudi Arabia, "yes" is a rotation of the head from side to side (like we have "no"), and "no" is throwing the head back and clicking the tongue. In Lebanon and Iran, to say "no", it is enough to sharply raise and throw back the head, and to say "yes", on the contrary, slightly tilt it forward and downward. In Turkey, denial is expressed like this: you need to tilt your head back slightly and close your eyes. The Turkish statement is that the head is tilted down and slightly to the side.
Evil tongues claim that it was Princess Diana's flirtatious habit of tilting her head slightly to the side and down that influenced her philanthropic career. Whenever she visited with a humanitarian mission any of the Middle Eastern countries and listened there to numerous requests for help, this gesture of hers was taken for consent to help and was scattered in gratitude. The princess had no choice but to really fulfill the requests of all those in need.
In India and Malaysia, they shake their heads from one shoulder to another in agreement (this gesture in Russia means condemnation).
In Germany, "no" is often indicated by waving the hand from side to side (a favorite gesture of Soviet leaders on the podium of the Mausoleum).
As you know, Bulgarians shake their heads from side to side in agreement, and nod in denial. Legend has it that these gestures originate from the act of one folk hero... The conquering Turks persuaded him to renounce the faith of the fathers and to accept Islam. Under the threat of death, he had to verbally agree with them, but with a parallel gesture he simultaneously expressed denial. Since then, a nod in Bulgaria means "no".

To attract attention
To draw attention to their words, Brazilians snap their fingers while simultaneously throwing their hand sharply to the side. In Portugal, to be heard, you need to stretch your hand forward, palm down, and wiggle your fingers as if you were stroking someone on the head. A gesture that is often used by Western speakers to attract the attention of the audience (extended palm with outstretched fingers), among the Greeks, means a gross insult.

Danger signal
When a Spaniard or Latin American touches the lower eyelid with his index finger and pulls it down slightly, it means: "Be careful, keep your eyes open!" If a Frenchman or a Dutchman rubs his nose with his index finger, he warns: "Something is unclean here", "Be careful", "These people cannot be trusted." This gesture is very close to the Italian tapping of the index finger on the nose, which means "beware, danger."

Doubt, bewilderment
When the Portuguese taps his forefinger on his chin, this gesture means: "I don't know!" And if you tap your chin with your thumb, this gesture will have a completely different meaning: someone has died. In Paraguay, to say “I don’t know,” they grab the chin with two fingers, in Japan they swing their hand from side to side. Puerto Ricans, wiggling the tip of their nose with their fingers, ask, "What's going on here?"

Apology
If a Hindu touches your shoulder with his fingers and then his forehead, it means that he apologizes to you. And if he grabs the lobes of his ears, then he deeply regrets what he has done and swears of his loyalty. This gesture is the traditional gesture of the servant, which the master scolds.

Good luck wishes
The Austrians, in order to wish the person good luck, put two fists together and make a downward movement, as if they were hitting a table with them. In the USA the middle and forefingers are crossed for good luck. The same gesture in Russia among children means that the person is going to tell a lie. In China, good luck wishes are fingers locked in a lock and pressed to the chest. Another variant of the Chinese gesture is the little fingers linked together. This means reaching an informal agreement and the hope that it will be long. Our children use the same gesture as a symbol of reconciliation, but in Latin America and the Middle East, clasped little fingers, on the contrary, should be interpreted as: "Everyone. We had a fight."
ANNA FENKO

Popular seven-language phrasebook

	"Go here!"	"Hi"	"Class!"	"Fuck you!"	"Yes"	"No"
In Russian	The palm is turned	Handshake	Fist, big	Raised fist	Nod their heads	Shaking their heads out
	up, fingers		thumbs up	arm bent in	up down	side to side
	beckon			elbow, the other
				lies on the elbow
				fold
American style	The palm is turned	Handshake	OK (ring)	Fist with raised	Nod their heads	Shaking their heads out
	up, fingers			up average	up down	side to side
	beckon			finger
In Arabic	Arm outstretched	Right hand to	NO (EMPTY	Fingers in	Tilt slightly	Throw back sharply
	palm forward	heart, then to	CELL)	"victoria", between	head sideways and	head
	way down. Fingers	forehead, then -		them the tip of the nose,	down (head
	move like	palm forward		lift it up,	hung)
	like digging the ground	up		imitating movements
				phallus
In Chinese	Arm outstretched	Straight bow	They bring their palm to	Raised fist	Nod their heads	Shaking their heads out
	palm forward	head	lips	arm bent in	up down (like u	side to side
	way down. Fingers			elbow, the other	US)	(like we have)
	move like			lies on the elbow
	like digging the ground			fold (like ours)
French	The palm is turned	Handshake	Air kiss	Pat	Nod their heads	Swing
	up, fingers			palm one	up down (like u	index
	beckon			hands clenched	US)	finger out
				another fist		side to side
						(like we have
						forbidden to children)
In German	The palm is turned	Handshake (like	Hands in the lock over	Fist with raised	Nod their heads	Hand waving
	up, fingers	we have)	head	up average	up and down (like u	from side to
	beckon			finger	US)	side palm to
						to the interlocutor
In greek	Arm outstretched	Handshake	Hand in a fist	Stretched forward	Tilt slightly	Head up
	palm forward		thumb	palm to	head sideways and
	way down. Fingers		up (like ours)	hand to the interlocutor	down (head
	move like			with splayed	hung)
	like digging the ground			fingers

How do you know if a person is lying? Recognizing non-verbal gestures that signal deception is one of the most important communication skills that can be learned by observing a person's behavior.

So, what gestures can betray a person in case he is lying?

These are gestures associated with touching the hands to the face.

When we watch or hear others tell lies or lie ourselves, we try to cover our mouth, eyes, or ears with our hands. We have already talked about the fact that children quite openly use gestures that indicate deception. If a small child is cheating, he will cover his mouth with his hand in an attempt to stop the false words coming out of his mouth. If he does not want to listen to the lectures of his parents, he simply covers his ears with his fingers or covers his ears with his hands. If he sees something that he would not like to look at, he covers his eyes with his hands. As a person grows up, his gestures, using his hands near his face, become more refined and less noticeable, but they still take place.If this gesture is used by a person at the time of speech, this indicates that he is not telling the truth. However, if he growls his mouth with his hand at the moment when you speak, and he listens, it means that he feels like you are lying!

One of the most depressing pictures for the speaker is the view of the audience, where one and all of them hold their hands to their mouths during a hundred performances. In a small classroom or in private, it might be wise to pause your message and ask the audience, "Would anyone like to comment on what I said?" This will allow the audience to express the weight of their objections, and it will give you the opportunity to clarify your statements and answer questions.

when a person lies, covers up a lie, or gives false testimony. These gestures can also indicate doubt, uncertainty, lies, or exaggeration of a real fact.

When a person makes a hand-to-face gesture, this does not always mean that he is lying. However, this can be the first sign of deception, and further observation of the person's behavior and gestures can confirm your suspicions. This gesture should be considered in conjunction with other gestures.

Dr. Desmond Morris conducted an experiment with nurses, which in the conditions role play the instruction was given to tell patients the truth about their condition. Nurses who had to cheat were more likely to use hand-to-face gestures than those who spoke the truth to their patients. This chapter examines the various hand-to-face gestures and the conditions in which they occur.

Hand Protecting the Mouth

Protecting the mouth with a hand is one of the few adult gestures and has the same meaning as a child's gesture. The hand covers the mouth and the thumb is pressed to the cheek, while the brain subconsciously sends signals to restrain the spoken words. Sometimes it may be just a few fingers at the mouth or even a fist, but the meaning of the gesture remains the same.

The hand gesture should be distinguished from evaluative gestures, which will be discussed later in this chapter.

Some people try to make fake coughs to disguise this gesture. Humphrey Bogart, when he was playing the role of a gangster or criminal, often used this technique when discussing his criminal plans with other gangsters or during interrogation, in order to use non-verbal means to emphasize the lack of sincerity in his character.

Touching the Nose

In essence, touching the nose is a subtle, disguised version of the previous gesture. It can be expressed in several light touches to the dimple under the nose, or it can be expressed in one quick, almost imperceptible touch. Some women use this gesture very carefully so as not to smudge their lipstick or damage their makeup.

One of the explanations for the nature of this gesture is that when bad thoughts penetrate the mind, the subconscious tells the hand to cover its mouth, but at the very last moment, out of the desire to disguise this gesture, the hand pulls away from the mouth, and a light touch to the nose is obtained.

Another explanation may be that when lying, tickling urges appear on the nerve endings of the nose, and I really want to scratch my nose to get rid of them. I am often asked: "What if a person just often has an itchy nose?" If the nose itches, then the person will deliberately scratch or scratch it, which is different from lightly touching the hand on the nose in a situation of deception. Like touching the mouth, touching the nose can be used both by the speaker to disguise his own deception, and by the listener who doubts the sincerity of the speaker's words.

Rubbing the Eyelid

The wise monkey says, “I see no sin,” closing his eyes. This gesture is caused by the desire in the brain to hide from the deception, suspicion or lies that he is facing, or the desire to avoid looking in the eyes of the person to whom he is telling a lie. Men usually rub their eyelids in a very energetic way, and if the lie is very serious, they turn their gaze to the side, usually to the floor. Women very delicately do this movement by sliding their finger under the eye. This may be due to two reasons: due to their upbringing, they are not familiar with rude gestures; the caution of movements is due to the presence of makeup on the eyelids. Moving their eyes to the side, they stare at the ceiling.

The expression "Lie through clenched teeth" is known. This expression refers to a complex of gestures consisting of clenched teeth and a forced smile, rubbing the eyelid with a finger and looking away. Film actors use this complex gesture to portray the insincerity of their characters, but in ordinary life this gesture is rare.

Scratching and Rubbing the Ear

In fact, this gesture is caused by the listener's desire to isolate himself from words by placing his hand near or on top of the ear. This gesture is an adult, improved modification of the gesture of a small child, when he covers his ears, so as not to listen to reproaches from parents. Other options for touching your ear include rubbing your ear, drilling in your ear (with your fingertip), pulling your earlobe, or bending your ear to try to cover the opening. This last gesture indicates that the person has heard enough and wants, perhaps, to speak out.

Scratching the Neck

In this case, the person scratches with his index finger. right hand place under the earlobe or the side of the neck. Our observation of this gesture revealed an interesting point: the person usually makes five scratching movements. Very rarely, the number of scratches will be less than five or more than five. This gesture speaks of the doubt and insecurity of the person who says: "I'm not sure that I agree with you." It is especially striking if it contradicts verbal language, for example, if a person says something like: "I understand perfectly what you are experiencing."

Collar Pull Back

While researching the gestures of people accompanying their lies, Desmond Morris observed that lying causes an itchy sensation in tender muscle tissue face and neck, and scratching is required to calm these sensations. This seems to be an acceptable explanation for why some people pull back their collars when they are lying and suspect that their deception has been exposed. It also looks like the cheater has beads of sweat on his neck when he senses that you suspect cheating. This gesture is also used when a person is angry or upset, while pulling the collar away from the neck to cool it. fresh air... When you see a person making this gesture, you can ask him, "Could you repeat this, sir?" or "Could you clarify this point, sir?" And this will force the cheater to refuse to continue his cunning game.

Fingers in the mouth

Morris gives the following explanation for this gesture: a person puts his fingers in his mouth in a state of great oppression. This is an unconscious attempt by man to return to that safe, cloudless time in infancy when the baby sucked on his mother's breast. Small child sucks a finger, and as for an adult, in addition to a finger, he puts objects such as cigarettes, pipes, pens, and the like into his mouth. While covering the mouth with a hand indicates deception, fingers in the mouth indicate an inner need for approval and support. Therefore, when this gesture appears, it is necessary to support the person or assure him with guarantees (Fig. 57).

Interpretation of Gestures and Errors of Interpretation

It takes a certain amount of time and a certain level of observational skills in order to develop the ability, under certain circumstances, to correctly interpret gestures associated with the approach of hands to the face. We can confidently conclude that if such a gesture flashed in a person, it means that he has something unpleasant on his mind. The only question is, what is it? It can be doubt, deception, uncertainty, some exaggeration of the actual fact, a gloomy foreboding or outright lie. The art of correct interpretation lies in determining which of the listed negative emotions is present. This is best done by analyzing the gestures that precede the hand-to-face gesture, taking into account the context of the communication.

For example, a friend of mine, with whom we often play chess, often rubs his ear or touches his nose when he is not sure of the correctness of his next move. I recently noticed other gestures of his that I can interpret and use to my advantage. I found that as soon as I intend to move a piece by touching it, he instantly makes a series of gestures giving information about how he interprets my intended move. If he leans back and makes a steeple-like gesture (confidence), I can assume that he foresaw such a move and may have already thought about how to respond to it. If, at the moment when I touch the chess piece, he covers his mouth with his hand and rubs his nose or ear; this means that he did not expect such a move and does not know how to move further. It is clear that the more often I walk after his hand-to-face gestures, the more chances I have of winning.

I recently interviewed a young man who wants to get a job at our company. Throughout the interview, he sat with his arms crossed over his chest and his legs crossed, his gestures spoke of a critical attitude, his palms were seen too rarely, and his gaze met my eyes only 1/3 of the time. Something clearly bothered him, but at the time of the interview I had too little information to make accurate assessments of his negative gestures. I asked him about previous positions and jobs. When he answered, his answers were accompanied by rubbing his eyelids and touching his nose, and he continued to avoid my gaze. This continued throughout the entire interview, and ultimately I made the decision not to hire this person based on my sixth sense. The thought of negative gestures haunted me, and I decided to check its characteristics. I found that he was giving me the wrong information about his past. If I hadn't paid attention to him non-verbal signals, I could have made the mistake of hiring this person.

At the managers' seminar, a video of a role play based on a job interview was played. During this interview, the job candidate unexpectedly covered his mouth with his hand and rubbed his nose when asked one of the questions. Until this point in the interview, he was sitting in an open position, unbuttoning his jacket, exposing his palms and leaning forward when answering questions, so at first we thought that those gestures did not coincide with his general line of behavior. The gesture of covering his mouth lasted for a few seconds before he answered, and then he returned to his open position. At the end of the role play, we asked him about this gesture, and he said that when he was asked that question, he could give two answers, one positive, the other negative. When he pondered the negative answer and what impression it might make, he involuntarily came up with a gesture of "covering his mouth with his hand." When he thought about the affirmative answer, the hand fell, and he returned to his previous open position. His reflections on how the audience would react to a negative response triggered an unexpected "eating" hand covering his mouth.

These examples show how easy it is to misinterpret hand-to-face gestures and arrive at the wrong conclusions. And only through constant training By observing and studying these gestures, taking into account the context in which the gestures are made, one can learn to make correct interpretations about the thoughts of people.

Propping the Cheek and Chin with the Palm

A good lecturer is one who instinctively senses when his audience is interested in what he is saying, and when it has lost interest. A good trader senses when he is “hitting the right strings”; gropes whether the buyer is interested in his product or not. Every traveling salesman is familiar with the unpleasant feeling that arises if his potential buyer is present at the presentation of the product, without uttering a word, and only observes. Fortunately, his reaction can be judged by a number of gestures, which may include propping up his cheek or chin with his palm.

When the listener begins to put his hand out in order to rest his head on it, this is a sure sign that he has become bored, and he rests his head with his hand in order not to fall asleep.

The degree of boredom correlates with the severity of using the hand as support. Ultimate boredom and lack of interest are visible when the head rests completely on the hand (Fig. 58), and an absolute signal of boredom will be if a person lies with his head on the table and snores!

Tapping your toes on the table and constantly stomping your feet on the floor are often misinterpreted as signs of boredom in the audience, but in fact, they indicate impatience.

If you, as a lecturer, notice these signals, you need to make a strategic move to distract the impatient person and captivate him with the lecture so that he does not infect others in the audience. If the entire audience shows signs of boredom and impatience, this tells the lecturer that it is time for him to finish his speech. It is important to note in this regard that the speed of tapping or stamping with your feet depends on the degree of impatience of the person. The faster the gestures, the more impatient the listener becomes.

Evaluative Relationships

A person assumes an evaluative pose if he props his cheek with fingers clenched into a fist, and the index finger rests on the temple (Fig. 59). If the person loses interest but wants to appear interested, out of politeness, the posture will change slightly so that the head rests on the base of the palm, as shown in Figure 58. I have attended numerous management meetings where "I have seen young emerging managers use this gesture. in order to portray interest out of respect for the president of the company, who at that moment was making a boring message. However, unfortunately for them, any support of the head with a hand means boredom and betrays them, and the president may understand that they are insincere in nature or simply want flatter him.

Real interest occurs when the hand under the cheek does not support the head. An easy way to rekindle their interest, maybe if the president says something like, "I'm glad you are listening to my words so much, because in a second I'll be asking you questions!" This will help increase the interest of the audience in his speech, because they are afraid that they will not be able to answer his questions.

When the index finger is pointing vertically to the temple and the thumb is supporting the chin, this indicates that the listener is negative or critical of the lecturer or the subject of his message. Often times, the index finger can rub or pull on the eyelid as negative thoughts thicken. The longer a person keeps these gestures, the longer his critical attitude will last. This gesture is a signal that the speaker needs to urgently do something, or try to captivate the listener with the content of his message, or round off his speech. The easy way is to give him something to support and thus change his posture. The gesture of critical appraisal is often confused with a signal of interest, but in the case of a critical attitude, there will necessarily be a propping of the chin with the thumb of the hand (Fig. 60).

Stroking Chin

The next time you have the opportunity to propose an idea to a group of people, observe carefully their reaction at the moment when you do it, and you will take away a lot of fun. Most, if not all, of your group members will bring one hand to their face and start making evaluative gestures. When you come to the end of your presentation and ask group members for their opinions or suggestions on your idea, the judgmental gestures will disappear. Your listeners will move one hand to the chin and begin stroking the chin.

This “stroking the chin” gesture means that the person is trying to make a decision. When you asked the audience for their views, their gestures changed from judgmental to decision-making. The following signals will indicate to you whether their decision will be positive or negative. The selling agent would be unwise to interrupt the buyer when he

starts stroking his chin when asked to communicate his purchase decision. His best course of action would be to carefully observe the subsequent gestures of the buyer, which will tell you what decision he has come to. If, for example, after this gesture, he crosses his arms over his chest and crosses his legs, then leans back in his chair, the traveling salesman received a non-verbal negative response. Immediately, you should once again go through the merits of the proposed product before the buyer verbally expressed his negative answer, and this can save the negotiations.

If, after stroking the chin, a gesture of readiness follows (Fig. 97), the seller will only have to clarify how the payment for the goods will be made, and the buyer will make the purchase.

Decision-Related Gesture Options

If a person wears glasses, then following the evaluative gestures to make a decision, he will do the following: he will take off his glasses and put one arch of the glasses in his mouth, instead of stroking his chin. The smoker will place the pipe in his mouth. If the person, after being asked to communicate his decision, takes a pen or finger in his mouth; this is a sign that he is not confident in himself, and he needs support, because an object in his mouth allows him not to pronounce the decision, to think longer. Since it is considered bad manners to speak with a full mouth, an object in the mouth is considered an excuse for a person hesitating to make a hasty decision.

Combination of Various Hand-to-Face Gestures

Sometimes the gestures of boredom, critical attitude and decision making can all be used at the same time, each reflecting some aspect of the person's attitude.

Figure 63 shows how the evaluative gesture moves to the chin, while the hand can stroke the chin at this time. When the listener begins to lose interest in the speaker, the head begins to lean towards the arm for support. Figure 64 shows the critical score expressed by propping up the head with the thumb because the listener has lost interest in the topic of the conversation.

Back of Head Rub and Forehead Clap

An exaggerated variation of the collar pulling gesture is rubbing the nape of the neck with the palm of his hand, what Kalero called the "aching neck" gesture. If a person makes this gesture while uttering a lie, he averts his eyes and looks at the floor. This gesture is also a sign of frustration or anger, but in this case, the hand first slaps on the neck and then begins to rub it.

Suppose that you asked your subordinate to fulfill your assignment, and that he forgot to do it by the required time. When you ask him about the results of the assignment, he will non-verbally answer that he forgot to do it, slapping himself on the forehead or on the neck, as if figuratively beating, punishing himself for forgetfulness. Although a slap on the head usually signifies forgetfulness, the person with this gesture also expresses their feelings towards you or the situation, depending on whether

where the slap falls - on the forehead or on the neck. If he slaps himself on the forehead (Fig. 66), he signals that he is not afraid that he has shown his forgetfulness in front of you. But when he slaps himself on the neck (Fig. 65), he informs you in such a non-verbal way that he is terribly unpleasant that you pointed out this mistake to him. People who have a habit of rubbing the back of their neck tend to be negative or critical of others, while those who usually slap their foreheads to non-verbally admit a mistake tend to be more open, agreeable people.

A slap in the face is a rather unexpected "treat" even for sleep. How to understand why you are dreaming that you received a blow in the face? What does the dream book write - is it an alarming sign, or, on the contrary, is fate favorable to you?

The face in dreams is considered a sign of our communication with the closest people. It is customary to decipher dreams with this symbol, starting from the emotions that we experience in a dream. Therefore, remember: what did you (or you) hit, what did you feel, what followed next?

What exactly was the blow?

• Palm: a dream to move up the career ladder.
• With a fist: to a showdown among your relatives.
• With the glove: fate challenges you.
• With a stick: something bad will happen to you.
• Something heavy: you will soon feel disappointed.
• With a rag: you will be sucked in by household chores.

Where did he come from?

• In the nose: something will excite you.
• On the cheeks: you will be ashamed or ashamed.
• Into the eye: sleep means the wrong look.
• In the cheekbone: something will disappoint you.
• In the jaw, in the teeth: you will lose something.

Did you get a slap in the face?

• Why dream that they are hitting you in the face? IN real life you are morally "pressed" by a person who has power over you (teacher, boss, mother, wife).
• Was there blood after the blow? If yes, then you should prepare for your visit a loved one... If not, a stranger will be the guest. Well, if a bruise adorns your face, the dream says: you can get sick.

Did you give out the slap in the face? And who exactly got it from you?

• To your loved one: it may be wrong.
• To your spouse: in fact, your marriage can be called successful. If in a dream you beat him out of jealousy (say, he winked at another woman), this means that he will be faithful to you in “real life”.
• Your spouse or girlfriend: You should learn to have a sense of proportion. And not only in the manifestation of their emotions, but also when eating.
• Stranger: You are destined to meet the nicest person. If you were arguing with by a stranger, and on emotions "treated" him with a slap in the face, a dream means: your colleagues (partners) will let you down a lot.
• To your ex: you still miss him.
• Opponent: your loved one does not cheat on you.
• To your mom or dad: expect bad changes in your life. If mom cried at the same time, sleep means that in real life you do not get along. If, even after the slap in the face, she laughed, you should expect positive news.
• For yourself: you will achieve your own goal.
• To the deceased: you do not want certain information about you to go public.
• To your colleague: a dream to win an argument.
• To someone else's child: in order to "pull" your project, you will have to take justified risks.
• For your own child: you will learn something new, and it will be very difficult to give new knowledge.

Or maybe you were just an unwitting witness to the "massacre"?

• According to the dream book: they hit your real acquaintance in the face in front of you, but you are not doing anything, which means that you are offended by him. If you rushed to help a friend, it means that in fact it was you who offended your acquaintance and now you are tormented by remorse.
• If a person you seem to know is hurt in a dream, it means that you regret something.
• You saw how the woman was hit and she fainted: you will keep some secret. If, on the contrary, Madame lost consciousness, and she was slapped on her cheeks to bring her back to her senses, your secret will be revealed, and it will also “explode” like a powerful information bomb.
• If your acquaintances (a couple, a guy and a girl) fought with each other, this dream says that in real life you will soon be present at a stormy showdown.
• If you saw how your child was hit, it means that you are unhappy with your life.
• Did the kid cry bitterly? Sleep promises a lot of trouble. On the contrary, he didn't even cry? Sleep promises a successful completion of your affairs.
• You saw your adult daughter with a broken cheekbone: you will have a lot of trouble, and they will not bear the fruits you think about.
• You saw in a dream your spouse in the role of a boxer, and his partner in the ring was an unfamiliar woman: your husband's career (business) is in danger.

And what do famous books write about assault in a dream?

Despite the fact that any dream with a slap in the face can be very broadly deciphered by common dream books, it is worth learning more "highly specialized" opinions. Therefore, we propose to read what a world famous fortuneteller, as well as eminent psychoanalysts, wrote about such dreams.

Dream interpretation of Wangi

1. Hit you? To be confident in yourself, you have to "turn on" all your determination and not be shy. Nobody will help, and shouldn't - act on your own!
2. Did you hit? This is not the most good dream... The case you are working on may end in failure.
3. If, in a dream, your daughter hit her child in the face, this means: she needs to beware of injuries.

Miller's dream book

1. If a woman dreamed that she was hit in the face by her husband, it means that someone insulted her. If a stranger hit her, the dream suggests that her husband is very jealous.
2. A slap in the face from another woman is a sign that you may not be connecting with the best company.
3. Did a parent hit you? In real life, you can quarrel with them, and this "war" will not end overnight.
4. Did you hit your lover on the cheeks yourself? In "real life" he will treat you like a goddess.
5. Did you hit your husband's mistress you found out about in a dream? Do not be afraid: in fact, your spouse is faithful to you!
6. Did you hit the baby? This is bad dream warning you about an error that will take a long time to pay.
7. If in a dream a man slapped a "splash" on a person who insulted his beloved, this means that he has very strong nerves, and difficult situations he always thinks with his head, not with his emotions.
8. But to see that you are hit in the face in a dream because you stood up for the honor of a woman is not very good. The dream warns: your good name is denigrated by dirty gossip.

Freud's dream book

1. Male dream. A slap in the face is a sign of the dreamer's fear of intimacy. It is possible that this guy has never been with a woman.
2. Women's dream. Seeing that they are beaten in the face means: the dreamer looks closely at women with great interest, regarding them as bed partners. And besides, this lady is not alien to the craving for sex games.

Interpreting dreams is not as easy as it might seem. Indeed, sometimes the smallest detail or insignificant circumstance can change the meaning of a dream. For example, dream books, when interpreting why they dream of hitting someone in the face, recommend remembering: what they hit, what were the consequences, and in general, whether you hit in a dream or you.

Miller's dream book

If in a dream you hit someone in the face, it means that you are a very timid and insecure person. You are trying to release your anger and irritability through dreaming. A woman sees in a dream that her husband is hitting her on the cheeks, and she worries, why is this dreaming? The vision means that discord will "settle" in the family.

Briefly about the beaten ...

The meaning of dreams also depends on who exactly was hit in the face. Here's what the dream of beating a specific person is about:

• loved one - he will cheat on you;
• an unfamiliar man - to pleasant acquaintances;
• ex-boyfriend - you cannot "let go" of your relationship;
• a rival is a sign of loyalty to a lover.
• deceased - you want to hide some information about yourself.
• one of the parents - changes for the worse are coming;
• hitting yourself in the face - to achieve the goal.

You are a victim of an attack, or Trouble in dreams and in reality ...

But what interpretations are given various dream books if you dreamed that you were beaten in the face.

Pastor Loff's dream book, for example, believes that such a dream is a reflection of the real state of affairs. In reality, someone infringes on the dreamer, someone who has little control over him: a spouse, a boss, a representative of the authorities, etc.

But Miss Hasse in her dream book objects to him. The interpretation of a dream in which you are beaten on the cheeks promises unpleasant news about who beat you.

If you dismissed your hands - a sign of success and victory

Dreamed of a beaten face of a colleague who was beaten by you? In reality, you will be able to prevail in some kind of bet or dispute. To beat her husband in a dream is a sign that the dreamer is happy in marriage. Finding out why you dream of hitting your husband in the face for showing signs of attention to another woman will help Gypsy dream book... He prophesies a victory over a rival, if any.

Did you dream about the beaten face of a crying mother? You can't get along with her in real life. Mom's battered face glowed with happiness in a dream? An event will happen that will bring you good luck.

Observation from the side as a symbol of regret

Had a dream that you see how someone broke the nose of a person you know well? The interpretation depends on further actions: in a dream you stood up to protect this person - you somehow offended him in reality and now you regret; watched aside how his face was smashed - resentment lurked in your soul.

Do you want to know why there is a dream in which an eyebrow was broken to a person vaguely familiar to you? Eastern dream book indicates that such dreams symbolize regret for something.

Beating Response - From joy to sadness ...

I dreamed that your child was beaten: does it matter whether it is a daughter or a son? You are unhappy with the way things are developing around you. The child was still small, and cried all the time - you will bother a lot, prophesies Lunar dream book... An adult daughter appeared before you with blood on her cheekbones - chores will bring not the expectations you expected. The child did not shed a single tear - everything will happen as you planned.

How to understand the words of Jesus "if they hit you on the left cheek, turn the right one" and that "every earthly power- from God "(Antichrist - too?).

The priest Afanasy Gumerov, a resident of the Sretensky Monastery, answers:

The words of Jesus Christ “whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also” (Matthew 5:39) figuratively express the commandment: to respond to evil not with evil, but with good. But judgment and punishment over those who have done evil must be left to the Lord. This commandment is based on an immutable faith in the omniscience and omnipotence of God. The Lord alone knows the measure of what we need to endure. “Are not five small birds being sold for two assarii? and none of them is forgotten by God. And your hairs on your head are all numbered. So do not be afraid: you are dearer than many little birds ”(Luke 12: 6 - 7). If we fulfill this commandment, then we multiply good in the world. “For this is the will of God that, in doing good, we should block the lips of the ignorance of foolish people” (1 Pet. 2:15).

Is this commandment achievable? Yes. First of all, the Savior Himself gave us the greatest example of its fulfillment. By his redemptive feat. “Christ suffered for us, leaving us an example to follow in His footsteps. He committed no sin, and there was no flattery in His mouth. While he was cursing, He did not curse one another; suffering, he did not threaten, but betrayed the Judge to the Righteous. He Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, so that we, having died to sins, might live to righteousness: by His stripes you were healed ”(1 Pet. 2: 21-24). Many followers of Christ strove to fulfill this commandment and conquered evil. The faithful princes Boris and Gleb, when their brother Svyatopolk began a struggle against them, had their own squads and could, at the cost of bloodshed, try to take over him. But, as true disciples of Christ, they followed the path of sacrificial humility and became saints, and evil soon fell. One should not think that the fulfillment of this commandment is always associated with the shedding of blood. Not a day goes by that we do not have to show ourselves as true disciples of the Savior and respond with gentleness and love to small or big troubles caused to us. How often our spiritual weakness is revealed!

Is all authority from God? This question is answered by Scripture. Through all the sacred biblical books, the idea of ​​the absolute omnipotence of God passes. The Lord is the only Ruler of heaven, earth and hell "You rule over all the kingdoms of nations, and in Your hand is power and strength, and no one can stand against You!" (2 Chron. 20: 6). If not a single hair from the head can fall without the will of God (“Luke 21:19), then who can arbitrarily assert his authority over any nation. “The Lord is the kingdom, and He is the Sovereign over the nations” (Ps. 21:29). At the same time, one must distinguish. Some rulers are pleasing to Him. The Lord crowns them and anoints them for the kingdom: the prophet David, St. Constantine the Great, Justinian, Holy Queen Pulcheria, St. Grand Duke Vladimir and many faithful tsars, noble princes and other honest and worthy men. He chooses others to admonish peoples who have fallen into grave sins. Many rulers were such scourges in the hands of God: Sargon II, Nebuchadnezzar, Attila, Genghis Khan and many who lived after them. The Lord Himself speaks of the appointment of such power: “O Asshur, the rod of My anger! and the scourge in his hand is my indignation! " (Isa. 10: 5). Divine Providence allows such power to be affirmed and uses it for Its own purposes, but personal guilt for the crimes of the rulers remains. God knows exactly the extent of everyone's responsibility and will reward everyone at the Judgment. When Pontius Pilate told Jesus that he had the power to crucify and the power to let him go, “Jesus answered: you would have no power over me if it had not been given to you from above; therefore more sin is on the one who delivered me to you ”(John 19:10 - 11). At the end of times, to test people's faith before the forthcoming Judgment, the Antichrist will be allowed to temporarily establish dominion on the earth: “he has been given the power to act for forty-two months” (Rev. 13: 5). Then the Lord will not only deprive him of his power, but also “kill His lips with the spirit and destroy with the manifestation of His coming” (2 Thess. 2: 8).

The well-known truth that every nation has such rulers as it deserves is quite consistent with the biblical teaching of earthly power.