Psychology of communication: basic rules of understanding between men and women. Non-verbal signals: types and meaning

Language of the body

Non-verbal cues include:

• facial expressions,
• gestures,
• body movements;
• pose;
• eye contact;
• change of intonation in the voice;
• distancing.

Let's analyze their types in more detail.

Gesticulation... It includes any movements of the hands and hands. Here you can add manipulation of small objects.

Mimicry. These are the ones that can be read on a person's face: blinking, smiling, frowning, grinning. As well as any psychosomatic processes associated with the face: a sudden flush of blush, redness, pale appearance.

Body movements. Any body movements (this does not include those for which you need to use your hands and head). For example, drawing with your foot in the sand, protruding your chest, stretching, foot-to-foot gesture. Means general position body and its change. For example, a person might be standing by pressing their body against a wall while crossing their arms and legs. This will signal a certain psychological state.

Intonation. This includes:

• tone of speech;
• smacking lips;
• sighs;
• holding your breath;
• pause.

We have listed the main types of non-verbal body signals. It will be useful to study them for those who constantly work with people or speak in public. Such signs affect the subconscious of people much stronger than verbal ones.

Fake signals

Non-verbal signals cannot be completely controlled, which means they are very difficult to fake. They come from the realm of the unconscious, and if a person plays, then inconsistencies of words and facial expressions will be visible. He will not be able to completely relax, which is also easy to notice.

It happens that the interlocutor answers in the affirmative, but in fact does not think so. Notice that his head will unconsciously rock as if to say the opposite. Your intuition is a great help in the difficult task of recognizing the correspondence between verbal and non-verbal cues. Do not dismiss her, but rather listen.

Decryption errors

Non-verbal body signals are not always interpreted correctly, and for good reason. Let's take a look at the main mistakes:

• The context is ignored. Pay attention to the circumstances surrounding the situation. For example, you see a girl who lowered her sad eyes and hugged herself with her arms. At the same time, she trembles. If this lady is your employee and sits in the office, then you might think that she is upset and desperate. A woman at a bus stop in winter can send the same non-verbal signals, but at the same time she is simply very cold.
• Focus on just one gesture. For example, it can be the notorious gesture when the arms are crossed over the chest. Everyone knows that it means rejection, closeness of the interlocutor, rejection of your ideas. It is not always so. The interlocutor may just be comfortable standing like that, he was tired, leaned against the wall and folded his arms comfortably. In addition, you need to pay attention to the totality of non-verbal gestures. If on the chest, and at the same time the person has a frown, a raised eyebrow and legs turned away from you, then here we can talk about rejection.

The ability to recognize non-verbal signals of love is inherent in women by nature itself. This is the one Woman's intuition... It is given to the weaker sex in order to understand what a child needs at a time when he cannot yet say about it. But lovely ladies use it not only for their "direct" purpose. However, men are also endowed with a sixth sense ...

Male non-verbal signals

The stronger sex perfectly controls their emotions, at least better than women, but still it is almost impossible to completely disguise them:

• Dilation of the pupils. It is not always possible to look a guy directly in the eyes, but if you see that his pupils dilate when looking at you, then you can be sure: he likes you.
• Twitching of an eyebrow. If you notice such a non-verbal signal when looking at you, then it can also be interpreted as a sign of sympathy.
• An evaluative top-down view. The guy looked you in the eye, and then his gaze went down? You can rest assured that he likes you. Women are well aware of this masculine look. The paradox is that when a girl does this, the guy does not understand this sign.
• The pose of the sympathetic man. When he meets a pretty girl, a man begins to pretend involuntarily: to correct something, to wipe his shoes, to smooth his jacket. The guy who wants to be liked pulls in his stomach, tries to take the most advantageous position to show the muscles. He will not miss the opportunity to bring or move something in order to show his strength - "to flex his muscles."

Female non-verbal signals of sympathy

Girls are emotional creatures. It is a fact! The quantity and quality of non-verbal signals depends on how much the charming woman wants to attract the man's attention. Let's take a look at the tricks and tricks that ladies most often use unconsciously:

• Voice. Almost all ladies, when communicating with the object of sympathy, involuntarily change their voice. The normal rate of speech slows down. The voice becomes lower, there may even be a slight hoarseness. This suggests that a woman has sexual desire for a man.
• Shyness. When a girl likes a guy, but she is afraid of being rejected, then the pace of her speech, on the contrary, accelerates. The voice breaks, trembles, shrill notes appear. A spasm may occur in the throat, and a cough may occur.
• Chuckle. The girl's laugh also changes. even a well-mannered lady can suddenly start giggling hysterically, laughing out loud. The picture looks pretty silly.

Female magic

Girls use non-verbal signals to attract the stronger sex. The gestures most often used by ladies are as follows:

• touching the earlobe, straightening earrings;
• winding a strand of hair around a finger;
• demonstration of the wrist;
• stretching that reveals a thin waist, exposes a belly or a lush bust;
• demonstrative crossing of legs.

More overt sexual appeals:

• Playing with a shoe, preferably a boat. The girl takes it off and wiggles it on her toe, then puts it back on.
• Manipulation of cylindrical objects. Rolling cigarettes between fingers, stroking a misted champagne glass. These non-verbal cues indicate that the hands are ready to be fondled. In a man, such gestures awaken sexual fantasies against his will.

To make your gestures pleasing rather than aggressively sexual, remember why a woman needs her hands. They swing the baby, stroke and soothe the beloved man, massage him, relieving fatigue. If you keep this in mind, then the gestures and movements themselves will become smooth, graceful and soft. You will look natural and open.

Unattractive manipulation

If a girl came to a party with the specific purpose of meeting a guy, then you need to carefully monitor your gestures. Some can push off the stronger sex, no matter how beautiful the lady looks:

• You cannot stand with your legs and arms crossed. This reduces the chance of making a pleasant acquaintance to zero. This behavior suggests that you are closed to contact with people.
• Touch your face less with your hands. Propping one hand on the cheek, rubbing the nose, and rubbing the finger against the mouth are blue-stocking gestures. It also speaks of strong self-doubt.

Flying gait

A beautiful gait is another non-verbal cue for men. The strong sex is attracted by a flat back, laid back shoulders, feline grace. Do not wave your arms too much - it looks awkward.

You can read the character of a person by walking. This applies not only to women, but also to men. The fearful person takes small steps. A soldier's march signifies a penchant for manipulation and command. Angular movements will tell about duality in character. Such a person tries to defend himself, but may suddenly show aggression.

It is bad when the legs move, and the arms hang limply along the body. This betrays helplessness, unwillingness to take the initiative. In non-verbal language, it says, "I'm weak, do it all for me." Men don't like women like that.

In the movie "Marriage in Italian" Sophie showed an amazing gait, which has become a textbook. Her husband-director taught her to walk beautifully. He came up with a very funny way of training. The actress had to walk between two rows of bedside tables and close their doors with her hips. Sophie practiced until the flapping of the doors was barely audible.

How to understand that a person is lying

Non-verbal lie signals are not so difficult to recognize if you know some secrets. Our subconscious mind will not tell a lie and will easily betray a liar. Pay attention to the signals, they can give out the real thoughts of the person:

• gestures:
• sight;
• pose;
• intonation, timbre of voice.

Want to know what a son or teenage daughter is hiding? Or maybe you want to understand how your boss really treats you? Thought, is your husband cheating on you? You can find out the answers to these questions by studying the psychology of lies.

• Take a closer look at the left side. This part of the face can easily betray a liar. Take a close look at the person whose sincerity you doubt. If during the story it left hand dangles, describes obscure circles, or he wring his fingers on it - this is a sign that the interlocutor is lying. The left leg can give the same thing. The thing is that the left and right hemispheres of the brain control both the left and right sides of the body, only it works crosswise. This means that the right hemisphere, which is responsible for emotions and is difficult to control, is likely to betray a lie, even rehearsed beforehand.
• A mouth covered by a hand. If your counterpart wants to lie, then he can cover his mouth with his hand. The thumb is usually pressed against the cheek. In addition, the interlocutor may cough. The main thing is not to confuse this non-verbal sign with a real cold. If such a signal is given by the person who is listening, then this means distrust of the interlocutor.

• "Noodles on the ears". A person who is tired of their own lies will cover their ears with their hands or hold them near this part of the body. This gesture is an attempt to isolate oneself from a false story. The same will be done by a person who does not believe the words of his interlocutor.
• Pass through your teeth. There is such a proverb: "The word is not a sparrow; if it flies out, you cannot catch it." The person who deceives will try not to open the "birdhouse" much, that is, to speak not very loudly and, as it were, through clenched teeth. This behavior can also mean dissatisfaction, irritation, fatigue, or upset in the narrator. It all depends on the context and the situation.
• Eyes are a reflection of the truthfulness of words. The stronger sex does not like to look in the eyes if it deceives. The man scratches his eyelid. The lady can start touching up her makeup or pretend that something got into her eye. This non-verbal signal also indicates that you are bored with your counterpart.
• Look away. Representatives of the stronger sex control their emotions well, but if the deception is serious, then they transfer their gaze to the floor. Girls, as a rule, if they lie, they look at the ceiling.
• Neck itches. This is one of the most interesting gestures noticed by psychologists. The person who lies begins to scratch his neck with his index finger precisely right hand... In doing so, he usually makes five movements. If the interlocutor who listens does this, then this means that he does not believe his opponent.
• Keep it short. Even if a person has been preparing for a long time and thinking through a lie, he will try to give it out as quickly as possible and without unnecessary details. The liar himself is uncomfortable with the story he tells, so he will try to get it over with as soon as possible.
• An inquisitive look. If in ordinary conversation people do not have the habit of catching a reaction to their words, then the liar will look inquisitively in the eyes, checking whether they believe him or not.

How to spot a lie exactly?

There are situations when you need to know for sure whether the counterpart is telling the truth or lying. Try the tips below:

• Tell that not everyone understood. Ask the person you suspect of deception to repeat everything in detail. This is a serious psychological attack. The liar will start to get confused and go away from details. Observe what non-verbal signals his body is sending.
• Listen to the interlocutor carefully. Play different expressions on your face: abruptly change the benevolent to a sign of distrust. The interlocutor who is lying, carefully monitor your facial expression. If he knows the meaning of non-verbal signals or he intuitively feels something, he will immediately begin to panic and confuse.

How to recognize the sincerity of a smile

Anyone considers a smile a sign of sympathy and good attitude... It affects the subconscious in any way, whether you like it or not. Therefore, it is so important to distinguish between a real manifestation of sympathy or a fake forced smile, with the help of which they want to achieve something from you.

Asymmetry is a bad sign. A real smile is even, when a person "pulls on" it, then one corner of the mouth may be higher than the other. Showing off your teeth is also considered a sign of trust and sympathy. A sign of goodwill is that the interlocutor does not hesitate to laugh in front of you.

Irony. An ironic laugh is inherent in people who treat you, in general, well, but it means that in this moment you look comical. At the same time, the smile is slightly crooked, and one eye may be squinted.

Sarcasm - an open display of disrespect and arrogance. The person considers you inferior to himself and openly laughs at you. Signs of sarcasm:

• curvature of a smile;
• arrogant;
• malevolence in the voice.

How to understand non-verbal signals of boredom? This is especially necessary if a person's profession is associated with constant public speaking. It is also important for sales agents to understand whether a potential buyer is listening to his speech or just pretending. If your opponent is bored, he is unlikely to be able to hide it: body language does not deceive.

Boredom Signals

By such signs, you can recognize that the person you are talking to is not interested in your story or is bored with your company:

• If a person is in a seated position, especially at a table, then he will prop his head with his hand. And if he is not particularly visible (for example, a student at the back during lectures), then he may generally fall asleep.
• A person who is not interested will glance at his watch, as if he is in a hurry somewhere. He looks not at the interlocutor, but through him or in the other direction, trying to occupy his brain with something.
• The most common sign of fatigue is yawning. If a person already wants to end communication and go home, then he begins to slouch, pile on the wall, lean on the back of the chair.

Distance in sign language

Do you want to understand how the interlocutor treats you? Move closer to him. If you are pleasant to your counterpart, then he will stay in place and smile. In case of rejection, the person will automatically move away. He does not trust you, and it will be difficult to move into a closer phase of communication.

Non-verbal communication cues are very important. If they match your words, then the person will have confidence in you on an intuitive level. Understanding other people's non-verbal signs, you can "read" the interlocutor like a book.

Non-verbal cues in communication can help attract the attention of the opposite sex. A girl who speaks "body language" is more likely to attract the guy she likes. In addition, if a lady is familiar with such a concept as non-verbal signals of sympathy, and knows how to distinguish them, she will be able to protect herself from gigolos, swindlers and pick-up artists. By reading the signals that the body gives us, you can find out what the young man is up to and ascertain whether he really feels sympathy.

However, sign language is useful not only in amorous affairs. A person who makes a career gets a chance to better interact with their superiors or bypass their colleagues if they have such knowledge.

Have a nice time of days, dear readers of my blog! Much more often it happens that we pay more attention to the gestures, facial expressions and posture of a person than to his words, due to the fact that they are authentic, they are difficult to fake.

We read this information much more often unconsciously, I talked about the main points in my blog “What is non-verbal communication and how to identify emotional condition person. " But now I decided to delve a little into the topic, and give you an article on how and what it is, non-verbal communication between a woman and a man.

Relationships are complex and sometimes it is extremely important to understand the nuances of it. In addition, this information will be needed on a date, since the first impression settles very deeply in the perception, and it is very difficult to change it later.

Difference table

It is common knowledge that men and women are very different. They accept data in different ways, they have different needs, outlook on life, thinking, gestures and facial expressions. Let's take a closer look at this difference in the table:

No. Spheres. Woman. Man

1.Communication. The need is one and a half times higher. From childhood, this feature has already been manifested. It satisfies the need already at work, based on this, getting home prefers to be silent, thereby resting.

2. Purpose. The process itself is important. The desire is sure to achieve the result.

3. Topic of conversation. Failures, new things and stories about others. Work, good luck, sports

4. Reflections. Most often out loud, so it is easier to decide or to realize something. To myself, expressing only the final result of my reflections

5. The ability to interrupt. Rarely, but if this happened, it returns to the starting point at which I interrupted. Twice more often

6. The process of listening. Able to listen for a long time and carefully. On average, only 10-15 seconds, then distracted

7. Facial expressions are rich and easier to recognize. During a conversation, they observe the interlocutor in the eyes. They look to the side, the easiest thing is to identify a feeling of grief or sadness.

8. Lying. Able to easily fool, and reveal untruths due to her sensitivity and ability to subconsciously notice the discrepancy between words and non-verbal indicators. Lying unnaturally, succeeds for the most part in the case when the lady is ready to be fooled.

9. Critical. They are more critical of themselves, their position in society and appearance. Critical of others, especially of their interlocutors.

Manifestations in a man

• If the young man wants to please, or shows interest, he straightens his shoulders, pulls in his belly and raises his head. He may begin to unconsciously tidy himself up by fixing his hair or shirt collar. In an ergonomic case, he is looking for an opportunity to be closer, and in a huge company the socks of his shoes will be turned towards you. It can, as it were, accidentally touch you, your hair or your hand.
• Revealing falling in love is not difficult. It is worth taking a closer look at his pupils in a room where natural light is, if they are dilated, you were able to conquer him. The gaze periodically removes, at the time when you look at it. It is only fundamentally important to grasp the difference between the desire and boredom to hide their emotions in relation to you. At a meeting, he can slightly perceptibly raise one or both eyebrows up.
• If, when communicating with you, he spreads his legs widely, unfastens the top button of his shirt, glances over the figure and closely observes the lips - then this signals an increased interest in you, only of a sexual nature.
• Think about what mistake you have made if the man next to you starts to yawn, invite more interlocutors to the conversation, periodically glances at the clock, phone. Defocused gaze, socks of shoes turned towards the exit, fidgeting in a chair, or nervously tapping his fingers on the table are signals that he is impatient to leave your company.

Manifestations in a lady

• Indicators of sympathy are more pronounced - in addition to dilated pupils, girls' cheeks often turn red, they keep their eyes on the interlocutor they like for a longer time, they will be able to lick their lips, preen themselves, and allow reservations in a conversation. The mood is lifted, sometimes, in addition, they laugh at unsuccessful jokes, they can copy a pose, completely unconsciously, although they are "on the same wavelength." She throws her legs over her legs so that you have the opportunity to evaluate her thigh, if you are sitting next to her, she can touch her shoulder, as if by chance. If the socks are turned towards you, but is now flirting with another young man, it is fully possible that he wants to make you jealous, or check the reaction, as you liked.
• At a time when there is a sexual interest, a woman casually, at the smallest opportunity, looks at the figure of a young man. He can do it demonstratively, but for some reason quite often this gaze remains unrecognized.
• The indicator that she is not at all fascinating with your communication or is already rather tired of it is the same as that of the guys. A woman will show interest in everything, just not in you, she can yawn, cover her mouth with her palm, as if propping up her chin and cheek. If in the aggregate to all indicators her pose is completely closed, with crossed arms or legs, then now nothing good will come of it.

The crucial moment is that most of the indicators must be found at one moment, otherwise, it is fully possible that the interest will turn out to be fake, or directed not at you. There are times when a girl's eyes are burning, there is a joyful smile and her pupils are dilated only due to the fact that almost relatively recently she had a meeting with another person.

1. In a conversation, try to start with the main thing, and only later move on to the details, due to the fact that you fully have the opportunity to lead to irritation with a long story. The guy's type of thinking is such that, at the time when he hears about a problem, he immediately needs to look for a solution to it, while sometimes it is enough for a girl.
2. Go towards or go next to with a straight back and a slightly raised head, just do not overdo it, so that he does not consider you arrogant and proud. Movements should be free, uninhibited, under such conditions you will give the impression of a confident lady.
3. Demonstrate that you have developed sympathy, probably through a non-verbal invitation to your personal space - move closer to it, closing the distance between you, lightly touch your shoulder or fingertips in conversation, and tilt your body closer to it, this will create a feeling of closeness.
4. Repeat his pose, just not quite often, not demonstratively, but by chance, thereby creating an environment for trust. Adjust your hair occasionally and smile honestly. How to do this, you have the opportunity to read in the article "The most entertaining tricks of non-verbal communication between people."
5. Try to be natural, you should not use all seduction techniques at one moment, otherwise it can cause completely opposite emotions in the interlocutor.
6. At a time when you want to express your point of view, then start with the phrase "I think", instead of using "I feel", this will give the words more weight, then you will be listened to. Since, as we know, not a strong good half of humanity is distinguished by its emotionality, a tendency to make decisions under the influence of emotions, relying on intuition, while a good half of the strong is guided by logic.

1. If you start to smile often - you have the opportunity to be perceived suspiciously, on the basis of this, as well as for the opposite sex - it is fundamentally important to be able to laugh honestly. If you do not forget, the psychology of the not stronger sex is such that they easily read non-verbal data, this skill is laid down by nature, so that the mother can recognize the needs of her baby. Based on this, the most basic advice is to be sincere.
2. When communicating, show as many open gestures as possible, which indicate a willingness to be honest, open. For example, don't hide your palms, don't cross your legs ...
3. You should not dwell on other girls, otherwise the interlocutor will catch your gaze, which will not at all have a beneficial effect on the relationship.
4. There is such a gesture that shows your self-confidence and inner strength, it is called "pyramid", this is when the fingertips and palms are joined together. So, if you want to conquer the interlocutor and not give away your excitement, use it during meetings.
5. In order to dispose more to intimate relationships, you have the opportunity to use this technique: attach forefinger to the lower lip, hold it for a few seconds, then tap lightly on the lip several times and remove. This will reinforce the message and desire to move to a new level in the girl's subconscious.
6. Listen intently, try not to interrupt, leaning your body forward easily, showing your interest.
7. You have the opportunity to put your huge fingers behind the belt, and suddenly you are sitting - keep your hands on your hips, or stretch your legs forward, this will create a feeling of your disposition towards the girl, and a manifestation of love and a demonstration of masculinity.

Conclusion

That's all, dear readers, be more attentive to your interlocutors, apply the listed tips. Then you can easily determine whether the chosen one adores you, or the chosen one, or interest. For a more detailed study of the nuances of non-verbal communication, I advise you to read my article, in which I outlined a list of literature, thanks to which you can find answers to your questions: “TOP 10 best books about non-verbal communication which are worth reading. "

He assures that women are better than men knowledgeable in the interpretation of non-verbal information.

Non-verbal communication is everything except written and spoken words. People are always in communication - even silence sends a certain message to those around them. An interesting observation was made by Mehrabian, a professor at the University of California at Los Angeles. In his study, he found that when verbal and non-verbal information were conflicting, 55 percent of study participants took in information from facial expressions and body movements, 38 percent from voice prompts such as pauses and tone of voice, and only 7 percent of study participants perceived information that was conveyed by the spoken words. This finding means that over 90 percent of our information comes from people's non-verbal behavior. Non-verbal information is conveyed through voice prompts, use of space and distance, touch, color, clothing, and artifacts.

Non-verbal communication includes, but is not limited to:
Sensory sensations;
Visual perception;
Timbre, pitch, voice volume;
Use of personal space;
Gestures;

Pauses, silence;
Intonation;
Clothing and general form;
Posture;
Smile.

Women and men tend to use non-verbal behavior differently. For example, women tend to be more expressive when communicating; they use facial expressions and gestures when communicating more often than men. Women smile more often than men. Women smile so often that it can be difficult to understand when a smile conveys happiness. positive emotions, or means embarrassment, anger, sadness, thoughtfulness, and so on.

Men usually only smile when they are happy or when they hear something funny. Unlike women, masculine smiles tend to coincide with their feelings of happiness. Because men do not smile as often as women, and are not as expressive in their gestures and facial expressions, some perceive men as insensitive, or perceive them as cold and indifferent.

Women who don't smile and look directly at the speaker may be perceived as if they are upset, indifferent, or arrogant. Men who smile often (more than when they are just happy) and look at the speaker can be perceived as suspicious or troublemaking.
Women are more experienced than men at deciphering non-verbal information. The belief that women are more intuitive than men may be due to the fact that women hear verbal information and at the same time, they are sensitive to non-verbal information.
Women interpret both sources of messages, verbal and non-verbal information, when determining the meaning of the message as a whole. Men tend to focus on words and only perceive content from the messages they hear.

Some psychologists have argued that lower-status people generally need to be adept at reading messages from every source (both verbal and non-verbal) in order to receive a fuller message. When a person has a low status, then he wants to receive as much information as possible from a person with a higher status in order to respond accordingly. People of high status, as a rule, do not need to pay attention to all channels of communication from the interlocutor-subordinate or interlocutor with a lower status; it is enough for them to hear the words as a single message. However, for those of lower status, reading non-verbal information increases their survival and ability to succeed.

Sometimes the words of people do not correspond to their true beliefs and intentions. To figure out what your interlocutor is really thinking about, non-verbal gestures will help. Be a little more attentive when communicating. This will give you a lot more information than your opponent would like to convey.

Is it true?

Many people are skeptical about such an issue as Gestures, facial expressions are perceived as something natural and mechanical. But taking into account this fact, we can talk about the objectivity of the non-verbal mechanism. Psychologists have dedicated many scientific works this issue. But if this is not an argument for skeptics, it is enough to conduct an independent observation. So, for example, having learned to decipher the thoughts and feelings of your family and friends, later you will be able to see through strangers.

Of course, do not forget that there are exceptions to the rule. So, a person can take one or another posture simply out of habit. In addition, it cannot be ruled out that he is not feeling well or that he is wearing uncomfortable clothes. Human behavior can be significantly influenced by air temperature. Thus, the role of non-verbal communication should not be underestimated. Nevertheless, before making final conclusions, it is worth carefully analyzing the conditions in which the conversation takes place.

What are your hands in your pockets talking about?

It is often possible to notice how a person holds his hands in his pockets during a conversation. Someone considers this a manifestation of bad manners. Also, one should not reject the likelihood that a person is elementary frozen, being in uncomfortable temperature conditions. However, if we consider the non-verbal, we can come to the following conclusions:

• Hands hidden in pockets can be evidence of intense concentration. A person in a similar position can think about something or build a plan of action. At the same time, it can slightly wiggle or roll from heel to toe.
• Another decoding of this gesture - For example, at long meetings or social events, people often walk with their hands in their pockets, because you cannot leave the event, but nothing interesting happens at it. Thus, if the person you are talking to has adopted a similar position, it may be worth ending the conversation or turning it into a more engaging direction.
• If the speaker, not the listener, hid his hands in his pockets, this may indicate his insincerity. Usually, it is the hands that betray the lie, and therefore the person instinctively hides them so that you do not guess his intentions.
• Alternatively, hands in pockets may indicate the passive attitude of your interlocutor. He is most likely not interested or willing to do what you tell him to do. But the result, of course, will depend only on the level of your authority.
• If we consider the non-verbal gestures of men, then in communicating with the ladies, the hands hidden in the pocket of their trousers (namely trousers!) Speak of sympathy and sexual desire. But communicating with representatives of the same sex, they thus demonstrate power and independence.

Demonstration of superiority

Knowing non-verbal gestures, you can greatly facilitate your life, because they can understand the true intentions and attitude of the interlocutor towards you. So, for example, if someone is trying to demonstrate self-confidence, as well as superiority and power over you, this can be understood by the following signs:

• The man puts his hands behind his back, pushing his chest forward. Thus, he tries to show his fearlessness.
• Hands are casually dropped into pockets, and the body is imposingly relaxed. Thus, a person is trying to show that you are indifferent to him and not interested.
• Sometimes a domineering person can become defensive by crossing their arms over their chest and extending their thumbs. The latter means that although he is trying to defend himself, he feels superior to you.

Tactile interaction

When considering non-verbal gestures, it is worth paying Special attention tactile interaction with the interlocutor. So, we can talk about the following:

• If you hug when meeting with a friend or relative, short contact should be taken as nothing more than a tribute to decency.
• A strong hug means that the person missed you and is sincerely glad to see you. However, if the impact is too strong, and you literally choke on it, it is possible that the person is only trying to play the joy of meeting you.
• If during a hug a person treats you with anxiety, and you feel comfortable, this indicates a respectful attitude towards you.
• If, when meeting, a person is the first to open his palm for a handshake, this indicates his boundless trust in you.
• If, during a handshake, a person is not taken by the palm, but closer to the wrist, this indicates his suspicious mood. This is exactly how during the Roman Empire they checked if there was a dagger in the sleeve of the interlocutor.
• If the person shakes your hand firmly or grabs you with two palms, shaking vigorously (perhaps even causing you discomfort), this only indicates his sincere joy at meeting you.
• If during the handshake you feel that your interlocutor's hand is sluggish, then productive communication will not work, because he is not in the mood to contact you.
• If a person is palm down, he subconsciously seeks to dominate you.
• A pat on the shoulder signifies a friendly attitude. In addition, this gesture demonstrates the strength of the interlocutor and his willingness to help.
• Be attentive to people who grab your elbow during the conversation. Feeling your distrust, they similarly try to win you over and even suggest that he can become a reliable friend for you. But this gesture is not always sincere, because like psychological trick people with mercenary intentions often use it.

How to recognize sympathy

One of the main problems in relationships between opposite sexes is mistrust. Sometimes non-verbal communication can tell more than words. The gestures that indicate sympathy are as follows:

• - this is not a myth. The person who feels sympathy really looks a little differently, and the cornea becomes more hydrated. In addition, the pupils will be slightly dilated.
• A person in love, on a subconscious level, tries to please. Thus, when meeting, he performs various manipulations with his appearance: straightens his back, draws in his stomach, straightens his hair.
• Both men and women try to draw attention to external sex characteristics. This can be putting your toes behind the belt of your trousers, legs wide apart, the top button of your shirt unbuttoned.
• Vigorous gesticulation (sometimes inappropriate) can also be a sign of sympathy. The fact is that a person in love often loses control over their actions.
• The intentions of the interlocutor can be assessed by the direction of his gaze. If he keeps eye contact, there is reason to believe that he is interested in you as a person. And a glance running through the body speaks of nothing more than a sexual desire.
• If the interlocutor of the opposite sex is constantly trying to approach or touch you under any pretext, you can be sure of his sympathy.

Lack of interest

Sometimes a person continues the story, not suspecting that the interlocutor is completely uninteresting. Non-verbal communication will come to the rescue. Indifference gestures include:

• If your interlocutor is on his chest, he instinctively shuts himself off from you. You are either indifferent to him, or unpleasant.
• Pay attention to where the other person's gaze is directed. If he looks anywhere, but not in your direction, then it is worth ending the conversation.
• If a person wants to end the conversation and leave, he will be given a constant glance at the clock. Also, the toes of his shoes can be directed towards the door.

Features of facial expressions

Much can be said about a person and his mood, his facial expressions. Non-verbal gestures reflected on the face may indicate the following:

• narrowed eyes and pursed lips indicate an angry mood;
• raised eyebrows and wide open eyes mean surprise;
• in a state of fear, the lips are widely stretched, and their corners are lowered down;
• happiness is characterized by a calm look and slightly raised corners of the mouth;
• a sad man brings his eyebrows together and lowers the corners of his lips.

Voice intonation

The main ways of transmitting information are verbal. Non-verbal gestures can demonstrate what the other person is trying to hide. Intonation can be no less informative, which can tell about the following:

• fast and confused speech in low tones speaks of strong excitement;
• a confident and loud conversation indicates active enthusiasm;
• if the person speaks sluggishly, lowering the tone towards the end of the phrase, it comes about fatigue;
• measured and slow speech, which is characterized by a constant tone, indicates the arrogance of the interlocutor;
• constant pauses in speech, unintentional mistakes indicate nervousness and self-doubt.

Signs of a lie

Knowing the meaning of non-verbal gestures, you can recognize the lies of the interlocutors. So, it is worth paying attention to the following points:

• a long pause before the beginning of a phrase or frequent pauses;
• asymmetry in the work of facial muscles;
• facial expression does not change for more than 10 seconds;
• emotions arise with a delay and do not correspond to the content of speech;
• a tight smile that creates not a curved, but a narrow lip line;
• lack of visual contact;
• manipulation of hands and feet (tapping, twitching), and lip biting;
• attempts to keep gesticulation under control;
• heavy breathing and a constant increase in the tone of the voice;
• a closed pose with crossed arms and legs, as well as a hunched back;
• rubbing the nose or eyelids (it can be automatic and barely noticeable);
• (in terms of gestures and facial expressions) more active than the left;
• exaggerated emotions and gestures;
• frequent blinking.

Distance

Considering non-verbal means of gestures, one cannot but say about the distance that is maintained between people in certain conditions. So, the following indicators are considered generally accepted:

• up to half a meter is an intimate distance between loved ones who are in a trusting relationship;
• from 0.5 to 1.5 m is the interpersonal distance for friendly communication;
• 1.5-3.5 m - social distance, which is comfortable for interaction between unfamiliar people, as well as on business issues;
• 3.7 m is the public distance from which the performance is performed in front of a large audience.

Good to know for everyone

Max Egger is invaluable in the study of such a question as non-verbal means of gestures. He developed a system of 75 signals, the main of which are the following:

• the movement of the Adam's apple indicates the agitation of the interlocutor or that he is telling a lie;
• if hands come into contact with any object, this indicates insecurity;
• if a person strokes his chin, he considers the proposal;
• Biting on a finger, pencil, or the arch of glasses means that the person is evaluating you;
• stroking back side neck means anger or a feeling of threat from you;
• if a person rubs his palms, he expects to receive benefits;
• if the toes of the feet are spread apart, the person feels superior to you.

Conclusion

If you want to know more than you're told, it's worth learning sign language. Non-verbal communication is difficult to control, and therefore it can be considered the most objective. Nevertheless, you should never forget that certain gestures can be associated with well-being or external influences.

In addition to the ability to express our thoughts through speech, we have a non-verbal expression of emotions - this is the language of gestures, looks, facial expressions. People are not able to control all non-verbal emotions, therefore, in order to find out the true feelings of a person, you can use reading these signs.

What gestures of sympathy are

The main part of the gestures of sympathy is known to all. The fairer sex uses the same gestures, preening themselves. And men use the same: straighten their clothes, touch their hair, look into the eyes longer than usual.

Girls, like the stronger sex, use this gesture: they hide their thumbs. But they do it more gracefully - they hide their finger in their pocket, purse.

Excitement is given by a blush on the cheeks, enlarged pupils. But consider non-verbal signs in details.

Searching for the truth in a gaze

To figure out whether a person sympathizes with you or not, you need to closely look for the truth in his gaze. A person's eyes will be clear if they truly like you.

There are implicit and explicit forms of showing interest. If a person openly demonstrates sympathy, then respect is noticeable in the look. The eyes are open wide, and the stronger the sympathy, the more the pupils dilate.

People use a latent manifestation of sympathy if they are afraid of disappointment, deception. But, despite the fear, he is trying to somehow contact you, observe or watch. The hidden sympathetic glance is different: a person looks at a person of interest to him furtively so that he would not be noticed. If glances meet, he immediately averts his eyes. But from the outside, this behavior is very noticeable.

The views of different sexes are very different. Women are more resourceful. They are the ones who know how to “shoot” with their eyes and play “peepers”.

Visual Sign Language Men

To understand men's visual sign language, it is important to note the direction of the gaze. Anyone who is interested in you looks from top to bottom. First, the man notes the general attractiveness, then lowers his eyes lower, fixes his gaze on his chest and hips, after a while he looks at them again.

If a certain representative of the stronger sex shows sympathy, then this is evident from the frequency of glances and an increase in pupils.

Visual sign language women

But women have a different visual sign language. The weaker sex looks furtively. If a woman meets the eyes of a man she likes, then she often looks like a thief who was caught on the spot. She hides her eyes and blushes.

For the fairer sex, it is considered correct to look at the object of sympathy in secret. But experienced ladies behave more confidently. They are also embarrassed, but after averting their eyes, they return their gaze again, accompanying it with a smile.

Unlike representatives of the stronger sex, ladies examine a man who is attractive to them from the bottom up. This direction has a double meaning. Initially, the girl takes courage before looking in the eyes. In addition, meeting of views plays an important role.

Hidden gestures of sympathy

Each of us has a personal set of gestures that are used to attract the attention of an object. Latent gestures of sympathy are of interest.

As it was revealed earlier, the body language of the two sexes is too different. Of course, women's gestures are varied. At the same time, there are many universal signs that are inherent in representatives of the two sexes for hiding or showing emotions.

If a person doubts the reciprocity of feelings, then gestures acquire a certain caution. In this case, if you touch your secret admirer on purpose or inadvertently, he will withdraw his hand. It is easy to explain such behavior: a person hides feelings, avoids contact with you, because afraid not to cope with emotions and give them away.

The body language of a man who is interested in a girl

Subconsciously, the body language of a man who likes you is expressed like this. At first, he tries to attract the attention of the girl he likes with the usual beautification of himself. This is an instinct by nature: a guy will begin to correct his hair, straighten his tie, collar, jacket. These are movements at the subconscious level, even when a person hides feelings.

Non-verbal gestures of girls

If there is a handsome man nearby, then the girl's non-verbal gestures consist in correcting makeup, clothes, touching curls for no apparent reason. One of the clearest indicators of sympathy is the demonstration of the wrists.

When walking, the girls sexually swing their hips, showing their charms. Although this point is worth paying attention to when there are other signs. Many of the fairer sex do it unconsciously and just like that, even in the presence of men who are not interested in them.

In an informal meeting with a handsome man in informal gestures, they become very frank. This also applies to the case when there are “competitors” nearby, that is, other ladies. The girl will try to sit down so that you notice her slender legs. Usually, a cross-legged pose is used, but the knees are directed towards the interesting man.

During a conversation, women swing a shoe, holding it on their toes, and when it does fall down, this is a clear sign of flirting. If a girl shows a frank look along with a "suddenly" sleeping strap, half-asleep shoe and sits, keeping one foot on the other, you can be sure that she is ready to flirt. The obvious sexual appeal is the slightly parted and moisturized lips.

If a man is close to a girl who is interested, then he will notice how she slowly puts her legs on her legs, then changes their places. She can "inadvertently" touch the thighs or chest. The voice acquires a low timbre, becomes muffled.

Gestures of a man in love

It does not matter whether you have a meeting or a date for the first time, or you have started a relationship, but when an object of adoration appears on the horizon, all men act according to the same scheme. They try to attract the attention of the lady. To summarize, the gestures of a man in love look like this:

he unconsciously preens. On the machine, it is pulled in, straightened, straightened, the gait becomes light, becomes athletic, and the gaze burns. He straightens his hair, tie or shirt. In a matter of seconds, he even becomes visually younger;
puts his fingers on the belt. In this action, a sexual expression of interest in a woman, even closer to an animal, is 100% noticeable;
long look. His gaze is "stuck" on specific areas longer than usual. If a guy is truly interested, then his pupils are always dilated when looking at you. The direction of the gaze is from top to bottom;

head tilt. Trying to show yourself with better side, the man throws his head back a little, lifting his chin;
becomes almost close and obstructs. The guy approaches the girl, as if blocking her from others. This is a manifestation of the possessive instinct of a person in love;
copying. The young man copies your gestures, position, head movements. He can copy intonation.

Woman in love gestures

Now let's figure out what features the gestures of a woman in love have:

prepping again. The most revealing gesture is energetic head movements to throw the curls over the shoulders. It doesn't matter if they are long or short, these are instinctive movements;
showing the wrist. This zone is considered one of the most obvious erogenous zones;
legs apart. The girl spreads her legs a little wider than always when there is no handsome man nearby. It does not matter whether she is sitting or standing;
swinging hips. When walking, she shakes her hips more than usual, which will emphasize her sexuality;

secret views. Women look at the representatives of the stronger sex with slightly drooping eyelids, surreptitiously. At the same time, the gaze slides from top to bottom. This continues until the man notices. Then the girl will immediately hide her eyes and take them aside. Such behavior gives a sense of mystery, peeping at the object of adoration. This feeling will "lead" almost any representative of the stronger sex;
slightly parted, moist lips. It gives a woman sexuality, attractiveness, lures men;
stroking objects in the form of a cylinder. These are common subconscious manifestations, although they are successfully used by ladies for seduction. Stroking a glass, a glass, a straw in a cocktail suggests what a woman really wants;
crossing legs. Ladies use several flirting positions. The first is a bent knee. One leg is bent under the other, and the knee is directed towards the man. This is a relaxed pose, which allows you to show your knees without vulgarity. The second pose is foot on foot, constant change of position. The third - again foot to foot, but here is added flirting with half-removed shoes;
sorting through jewelry. Often in the process of flirting, a woman coquettishly touches her own jewelry: a chain, a bracelet, an earring. If these gestures are accompanied by a gaze directed at a man, then this is evidence of sympathy;
fiddling with curls. Many ladies are distinguished by the habit of fingering curls for no reason. It's easy to see sympathy in this gesture. A lady begins to engage in busting hair just at the moment of communication with a man she likes, and not at any time.

Lack of interest gestures

But there are non-verbal gestures that are demonstrated. One of them is crossed arms on the chest. Such a gesture says that the man does not want to contact you, he shields himself, feels awkward. In addition, crossed legs are also a sign of lack of sympathy.

Unwillingness to communicate is expressed in hiding hands in pockets, hiding ears, as well as attracting strangers into the conversation. Thus, the man turns on protection, builds a wall so as not to meet with you. In addition, signals that indicate a lack of interest are expressed in a dull look that from time to time a man takes away from you, an elongated face, a yawning.

With the help of other objects, he tries to entertain himself: he picks up the objects at hand and twists them, touches them. This is evidence of apathy.