Why is the child afraid to go to school. The child is afraid to go to school After the summer holidays

“My stomach hurts” or “I don’t have to go to school today” is a common problem, but the reasons are different. There are solutions for all ages.

Experiencing fears and anxieties is an absolutely normal phenomenon of a healthy psyche. Normally, fear makes a person “shake up” and become as active as possible, react, act quickly. In this sense, fear is unpleasant, but useful.

Everything changes when there are too many fears, or when a child “gets stuck” in them, loses control over himself and the situation. Why is this happening? Phobias don't happen overnight. Most often, this is the result of a long cumulative process, starting from early childhood, the course of pregnancy and childbirth. Or it is a fear of separation from parents, or difficulties with studies, or troubles in relations with teachers and classmates.

Or fear of the unknown, high parental expectations, low children's self-esteem, too strict parents or too anxious parents. Dealing with injuries, problems and their consequences, of course, should be entrusted to a specialist psychologist (for a child of preschool and primary school age, for example, art therapy is suitable - fairy tale therapy, drawing therapy, for teenagers - cinema therapy, group therapy). However, there is a space in which parents and children can and should work independently.

A phobia is nothing more than fear ... fear itself, that is, the strongest, literally panicky, rejection of fear as such. The paradox lies in the fact that in order to defeat children's phobias, parents will have to ... love them: recognize, accept and "beat".

How can I help my child get over his fear of school?

In addition to all of the above - difficulties with studies or relationships - the real problem can be absolutely trifling, but at the same time disturb the child: forgot a poem at the holiday, dropped something in the dining room, went to the toilet for the opposite sex - whatever. Explain how to cope with the feeling of discomfort and how to correct the situation.

Often children feel that all adult members of the family are working on some common task, trying to protect the child from it. Children intuitively will try to take part in a difficult situation, to be at home and close to their families so as not to miss anything. If there is a problem, and parents unite to solve it, but the child is not initiated into it, the child feels it anyway. Do not hide from him the presence of a common family business - tell as much as you see fit. Place the accents in such a way that the child understands that the best help on his part now is to study, go to school, gain knowledge, stay healthy and cheerful.

Do not object or criticize, on the contrary, support your child. Kindly, slowly and optimistically talk about topics that disturb him as much as he needs. Explain to him that it is normal to feel fear and anxiety.

After listening carefully and sympathetically to the child, try to smoothly move the conversation from a negative plot to the desired, favorable scenario. Ask what the child thinks would be the best solution. At the same time, act slowly, gently and tactfully, asking leading questions. It is important that in such conversations the child develops initiative, and feels, along with parental support and understanding, that he himself is able to find a way out of unpleasant situations. Tell us about your school fears and their disappearance. Laugh together at situations - like children's horror stories.

Use the principle of "gradual exposure". Put the child in a new and unknown situation for a little while, and be with him as much as possible. Think of a way to get him schooled in tiny chunks. Speak in detail with him what he will do during separation, tell the baby in detail what you will do while he is at school. Think together about how you celebrate the end of the school day, the end of the school week.

Get creative with the principle of combining business with pleasure: organize an introductory tour of the school in the company of your favorite friends. Plan picnics with your classmates, take them to the bowling alley, zoo, museum or rides this coming weekend. The more positive emotions, the sooner friendly relations will be established in the class. Encourage your child to make friends and make friends with classmates (offer to invite over after school, bake fun cookies and treat classmates, have a photo shoot or themed party).

Nothing increases motivation and enthusiasm in childhood like parental support. Knowing that parents appreciate and love the child for who he is, the child will be more resistant to stress and cheerful. Explain that troubles can arise at school, and you need to be ready to deal with them. Say that you will always help - both with studies and in relationships with teachers and peers. In everything and always you will be there.

Hello.
I've been having a lot of problems with my studies lately. Algebra and geometry are not given to me at all, a complete zero in these subjects. The grades for them are simply terrible, for a quarter of 3, maybe soon there will be 2. There is no money for a tutor. I am terribly afraid of the teacher in these subjects, she yells at me all the time. I am in the 8th grade, I think I will not be able to pass the OGE in algebra.
I always wanted to become a translator, but my mother said that I would not succeed and would not become anyone at all if I did not learn algebra. But I can’t, every day I try to understand something, but nothing happens. All subjects except algebra and geometry seem to be given normally. I also fell ill with a sore throat, I have been sick for the second week already, in general, I must have lagged far behind. I'm terribly afraid to go to school, because my grades in algebra and geometry are terrible, but I don't know how to correct them, the teacher does not allow me to correct them. I am also studying in another city.
What to do? In general, why live if no one believes in you and you will not succeed in life?
Support the site:

Vlada, age: 14/26/11/2016

Responses:

Power dear!!! algebra and geometry - not the main thing in life! It doesn't come easy for everyone. I can say that only a few! it was never given to me and I graduated from school with two triples)) guess what subjects) - but nevertheless, this did not stop me from getting two higher educations with honors in life) and my daughter also has a triplet ((((although in otherwise - she's an excellent student. Your mother, of course, wants you to have better grades - every mother wants this) Mom believes in you, she just worries herself. , I would talk to my mother, tell her that it’s difficult for you and you are very, very worried.Then I would talk with the teacher - ours agreed to study at school additionally and for free. but for you now it's a big problem.Talk about your worries with your mom - tell it like it is.Pray, ask the Lord for help - he knows your worries) You try to do what you can - read the paragraph carefully, ask what it is not clear from the teacher after the lessons - she, too, with It's hard, there are many of you, the work is hard. Let there be three. It's not scary. Why ruin your life because of grades? Is your precious life given by God - so little appreciated??? It seems to me that you are primarily afraid of your mother's reaction to grades - talk to her about it. And you will have many more interesting things ahead of you) You won’t go to work as a math teacher) You have many other talents! I believe that! God believes in you - after all, he created you special! And you will succeed! I pray for you and hug you! May God bless you!

Anfisa, age: 37 / 26.11.2016

There are a lot of economists, but there are translators who make great money. Learn languages. Maybe you are a polyglot.

Maybe someone at home decides that he has bad grades in foreign language. Find a girlfriend, she will help you with algebra, and you will help her with languages.

The translation profession is very successful.

People with knowledge of languages ​​are always in demand.

Parents often take their own fears out on their children.

Ask for help.
Explain that you are looking for help, that you are looking for a friend with whom you can study.
And about the translator just keep quiet. And keep your dream. And do everything to achieve it.

There are a lot of universities, there are a lot of specialties and a profession.
I wish you good luck.

But dreams also change. I used to want to be an economist. But by the time I entered the institute, I was already interested in another specialty.

Look at school as a place where you have the opportunity to choose the subjects that interest you.

Tell your mother or someone in the family about your guard in front of the teacher.

Dear, you will grow up and forget about algebra and about this teacher. Take care of yourself and your nerves.

I wish you good luck in all your exams. Good luck getting into college.
Learn and speak perfectly different languages ​​and work as a translator.
God help you

Jasmine, age: 11/27/2016

Hello! Vlada, if you are given languages, then you may well become a translator, why not?! And algebra won't hurt you. It is clear that you should not bring it to twos, but it’s not right to think that you won’t achieve anything because of a couple of difficult subjects. Be sure to finish school, pass the exams, enter, I believe in you!

Irina, age: 28 / 27.11.2016

The duration of the session is 1 hour 14 minutes.

Boy, 8 years old, Russia (reading conducted via Skype).

Q. She has a fear of going to school, being alone there without her mother or grandmother. Before school, he vomits, cannot eat. This was when he was in first grade. His mother sat with him at school for a while. What is it connected with? What it is?

A. Despite the fact that he is sociable, he finds contact with peers and adults, but just as quickly he comes into conflict with them. At the moment, he does not have friends with whom he constantly communicates, he quarrels with everyone, the same applies to adults. It is very difficult for him to follow the rules, he is constantly trying to change them and adjust them for himself, which leads to conflicts. They are difficult to manage. In the classroom, the teacher pays a lot of attention to him. There is constant chaos in the classroom, the educational process begins to break down. Stas constantly requires attention. This is exactly why conflicts arise. It is very difficult for him to do his homework, he starts to get nervous, he needs to make constant pauses and breaks. Any rules cause an internal protest in him. He has no friends, he quarrels with children, conflicts. They constantly scold him, try to put him in a framework, he constantly clashes with teachers. He is in constant agitation and conflict with everyone. When one of the relatives is nearby, the burden of close attention to oneself is not so heavy, it is shifted onto the shoulders of loved ones.

Q. He is afraid that he will not be taken away from school, that his grandmother or mother will change plans. Suddenly they will go shopping, or some accident will happen somewhere, and there will be no one to pick it up.

A. Are there children with whom he constantly communicates without conflict?

Q. He has a couple of friends.

A. How often does he receive comments from a teacher who is currently teaching several lessons? The teacher constantly monitors him, constantly corrects, makes comments. You have to ask Stas. There are two of them, but always one.

Q. What does this teacher look like?

A. She is from 35 to 40 years old, slim, short. Not a blonde and not a brunette, dark blond, brown-haired.

Q. Is this the one at the new school now?

A. The first teacher, the first imprint.

Q. Yes, it does.

A. The child cannot yet realize this, it is all subconscious. The first experience, a new stage, a new level, a transitional period, the first step towards responsibility and independence. There was a conflict, a bad experience, there is fear. It's all at the subconscious level. They survived everything, he went through it, but there was a prick, a splinter. The first class, the first steps, the first perception, the first experience was not very pleasant for both parties. And the school is perceived negatively, there is a fear of repeating and making a mistake. The child may not even be aware of it. A new stage and the rules to which he is obliged to obey. He grew freely, there were no prohibitions. He is a free child by nature. There are obedient children, and there are free ones. He used to have a lot of freedom, but now he doesn't. This is a psychological problem, psychocorrection is needed. He needs to be taken out of this situation. You need to work not only with Stas, but also with your mother and grandmother. We need the work of a child psychologist who would help Stas relieve his colossal stress. School causes him a state of stress. All physical manifestations, when he feels bad, cannot eat, spasmodic phenomena, this indicates that he is too tense. He goes to school very reluctantly. And the process itself is problematic for him, and he begins to bring it to perfection in his imagination, to draw the most negative attitude. He does not want to stay there, before he has arrived there, he already wants to go back. And he is frightened by the thought that suddenly something will happen, and he will have to stay there longer. The problem was based on a conflict, the teacher could not restrain himself, behaved incorrectly towards him, not pedagogically, because he demanded a lot of attention. The whole educational process began to stagger, which brought her out of balance. It is necessary to remove the negative that he received. He experienced it like a child, did not realize it, but it was imprinted in the subconscious. The situation is standard, it is not necessary to be afraid. For 3-6 months, it would be recommended to correct his behavior and attitude to certain situations. You need to get this negative out of him through drawings, descriptions, associations. You can try to do this to you, but direct physical contact is needed, as this has a stronger effect. The situation is fixable, and until it gets further problems, like a snowball, it needs to be corrected. Any such splinter begins to grow and grow. And as long as the situation does not get out of control, as long as it can be corrected, a small correction is needed, to change his attitude, to change the program. We need to take him to a child psychologist. He needs perseverance and learns to focus on the process, through games and through tasks. It is better to do this to an outsider, because the child perceives him differently, he is more focused and involved in the conversation. When it is close, the limits are erased, when an outsider, the limits are limited, especially when he is experienced and knowledgeable. Therefore, a specialist is needed. The situation is fixable, not critical. By erasing the negative, changing your attitude towards it, you can quite easily get rid of problems. It has to do with the physical and emotional state. There will be no vomiting, no fear of school. There is no need to panic.

Q. Does the new teacher suit him?

Oh yeah. She is older, more experienced, a good teacher, of a different temper than the previous one. But it's not the teachers, the problem is the child himself. Whatever the school may be, it will always be surrounded by different people. As you get older, there will be more teachers. There will also be more claims from everyone. Each teacher has a certain energy, a certain character and even a style. It is important to learn how to quickly adapt to situations, their correct perception. He is at the beginning of a long learning journey, so the right adjustments are important.

Q. What adjustments do grandmother and mother need to make, what do they need to understand?

A. More perseverance and exactingness towards him, between him and his grandmother and mother the frames are erased. He often dictates the terms, although he is still a child. They sometimes even change positions, he says what to do to mom, grandmother. The child must feel the framework, what is possible and what is not, and what has been started must be brought to the end strictly. But do not break loose, speak in a demanding and calm tone, not succumbing to provocations. This requires a lot of patience. Any process will stretch much longer. But whatever he has to do now, he has to do. This realization must come through the correct attitude towards him from the side of relatives. There must be a daily routine that must be observed at all times. What time to go to bed, what time to get up, there should be time for games and lessons. Everything must be thought out. There must be rules, and they must be established. He is a free child, lives on the level of "I want - I do not want." Children at this age are unconscious, he cannot calculate the correctness or incorrectness of his actions, he is unconscious, unlike adults. Adults understand, children do not, so they need to be constantly corrected. They cannot be limited, but there must be exactingness, he must understand that every action has consequences. If something is violated, the consequences are irreversible. Independence lies in the fact that the child must be aware of his area of ​​\u200b\u200bresponsibility. Even when he does not get the expected result, you cannot say no categorically. You need to choose the right words. I can't now, but then. You can't deprive a child of hope. There should be soft non-categorical approaches, to explain why it is impossible now, and then it will be possible. Then it will be easier to negotiate with the child. You need direct personal contact with a specialist.

Q. How can Stas be set up correctly? What settings should a psychologist give out, what should a mother or grandmother say?

A. You need to imperceptibly for him to pull the problem out, in what it ultimately consists. It's a psychological problem, a misperception. It's based on conflict. Describe or draw what he feels, maybe even speak. What is the problem and in what form. Why is he afraid that they will not take him away, and if they do not take him away, how does he see it, what will happen next. We need to bring this to an end. Ask questions and let him answer for himself. In the process of building a conversation, an experienced specialist will lead him to what he himself will bring out and will voice not only the problem itself, but also its solution. The child should always be given the opportunity to find the answer himself, to think. This is the first step towards conscious action. If you do, then you must know for what, why and why, how it can end. What's next, what do you think? If for some reason your mother was late and did not pick you up on time, what scares you at school? He voices what he is afraid of. What do you think, how can you get out of this situation, what can be done? With such leading questions, he himself will cope with the internal problem. I understood and I decided. I understood, and now I'm not afraid. We are afraid of what we do not know, even adults. Fear of the unknown. Going to school itself is stressful and fearful for him, even if he does not realize this, but it is. It needs to be brought out, spoken out. Lead him to the fact that he himself said what in this case needs to be done and how to act.

Q. Will he handle this problem?

A. This is the task not only of him, but also of his relatives. They all have to deal with this together. And it will be beneficial for everyone. He will succeed in joining the team and interacting with other people. By nature, he is contact and sociable. There will be no problems with this. This is a new stage in his life, it is difficult. School is stressful for a child. Everything is different, everything is different when something is constantly demanded of him. We are all very different. There are stereotypes that have developed, but in fact we are all different, we react to everything in different ways. Therefore, do not be afraid when they say that my child is not like everyone else. There is no identical approach in perception. It’s easier for some, it’s easier for someone, we are all different. With the right mind and the right approach, any problem can be solved. It is important for him to correctly perceive everything that happens to him around, and correctly respond to it. Learn to control yourself, analyze, draw conclusions. All this is quite possible and real. You just need to make an effort. In the future, you will have to refine what was once unfinished. This is especially true in the upbringing of children. This is a test, a difficult task that requires effort, patience, wisdom and knowledge. Not only do we teach children, but children also teach us. To some extent, they are also teachers for us. Looking at them, we change, they make us change, see further, wider and deeper. This is a general problem that is quite realistic to deal with, it is not so serious and deep, not so complicated, it can be solved.

B. He studies well. Maybe Vera is to blame for something, that this is happening to him?

A. Any fears are transmitted to loved ones. And children especially feel the fears of their parents and loved ones. Mother and child are energetically connected, they are in the same field. The more the mother experiences, the more the child will react to it. Fear is based on ignorance. The more there is an understanding of the essence of the process, the less fear there will be. Sometimes you need to be philosophical about problems that cannot be solved at the moment. You need to reason, calm down, plan to solve problems. There should be a calm and even attitude towards her. The less fears mom and grandmother have, the calmer Stas will be. Decrease your concerns and fears. You can not completely fence off the child from problems. They can be voiced, but in a form accessible to the child, so that he understands that not everything is fine right now, so you need to act this way and that way. But the child should not hear and see everything. If a mother is not sure of something, if a mother doubts herself, then the feeling of protection disappears. The child should feel confidence, kindness, love and a strong kind mother who knows and can do everything. This is how he should treat his parents. He must respect his mother and grandmother, because they are older, they are close, they know more. It needs to be put into it.

Q. Is there damage or evil eye on it?

A. There was and is a lot of envy. It is not directed at him, but since it acts in his field, it is also reflected on him. It is not specifically visible on him, but there is an evil eye and envy on those close to him.

Q. On whom specifically?

Oh. On my grandmother.

Q. From whom?

A. A wide range of people. Resentment from close circle, relatives. That the more you help, the more they demand, helped a hundred times, refused once, and that's it, a sharp negative. Such is the attitude towards the grandmother. From the people with whom I once had to work and cooperate, there is also a negative. There was mutual distrust. Not so much on my mother, but on my grandmother.

Q. How can I remove it somehow?

A. We are all in a certain environment, we are immersed in it, we have to interact. There is a constant inevitable energy exchange with acquaintances and even strangers, it's like garbage. As we clean the physical body, we need to clean the more subtle and invisible essence. Efforts must be made to ensure that one's own biological protection is dense and large. Good rest, enough water in the body. Cell dehydration must be avoided. In modern conditions and ecology, a huge number of electronic devices, this greatly destroys everything. You need to constantly adjust your biological shell. There must be a sufficient amount of oxygen, appropriate breathing, so that oxygen is delivered to the cells, physical activity 2 hours 2 times a week. To give kindness to those people who need it, to help. All actions and emotions should be based on love and gratitude, they need to be projected. Thus, the program is removed from the negative. Contrasting cold and hot showers, grounding, prayers and going to church heals and cleanses not only the body, but also the soul. There are people who can influence energy fields, align and correct them. But without personal effort, everything will come to where it started. You must have your own work.

Q. Could this envy and evil eye come from my mother's cousin?

Oh. Maybe. The strongest impact from people from whom you do not expect this, from them the negative has a great destructive power. Due to the fact that there is an energy relationship.

Q. In the last reading, they said that Stas would have problems at the age of 20-23. What kind of problems will he have?

A. A new stage of independence. He will always strive for independence, quickly become independent, break out from under guardianship. First steps towards independence. There will be an attempt to take more than it can carry. There will be problems with studies, which will be interrupted due to the fact that he will change something. There will be a problem of becoming, he will try to organize his business. He studies, then drops out, starts something up. Problems of formation. Does not listen to anyone, does what he sees fit. Not everything goes smoothly. There will be a break in studies, then he will study again. Associated with learning and development. Trying to prove yourself, to become independent.

Q. There will be no consequences for the family, for himself? Will he get off with a psychological breakdown, or will there be something serious?

A. Everything will depend on the adequacy of relatives, how much they will give him the opportunity to do something himself. Everything must be adequate. Parents are experienced, smart and knowledgeable. You can not just step aside, but take the position of an observer. “As a parent, I gave you everything I could give. You want independence. Everyone has the right to make mistakes, to go their own way. Since the child decides to be independent, then please be independent and solve your own problems as much as possible. I can help with this, but I'm more sorry, but you can only count on it. Because in case of failure, you will drown not only yourself, but you will drown us too. Learn from your mistakes, so try."

Q. What profession should he choose?

A. Trade and money relations, marketing, management. It needs to be developed in the field of economics.

Q. How will his family life turn out?

A. He will have children. With regard to marriage, he will be very cautious, and will not rush into it. At first there will be free relations, like a civil marriage, and then an official one. Everything will be gradual and long. Everyone already close to him will say that it is time to make a decision, to push him. Not alone, but at the same time he does not marry for a long time. Will calculate, be careful. He marries once, but he will think for a very long time. Everything will be fine in his personal life.

Q. Will he have children?

Q. Will my grandmother live to see her great-grandchildren?

A. With the right attitude, you can live a very long time and see your great-grandchildren. This is what we should strive for.

Q. How should she properly tune in?

A. Healthy lifestyle, healthy thoughts, positive. The fewer bindings, the freer. The freer the easier. The easier, the better. If there are material losses, they must be treated evenly and calmly. It's all solvable. Problems need to be dealt with as they come up. In case of problems, draw up a plan A, B, C. make sure, strategically calculate everything, and live in peace and enjoy every minute of this life. Thank the Universe and God for everything that he has and for all the people he loves. This attitude is the most correct and healthy. It gives confidence in today and tomorrow. The less the internal pendulum swings, the longer the life path. Actually it's not difficult. It seems that it is scary to lose something. In fact, the worst thing is the loss of people we love. Everything else is a solvable problem. You need to understand why you live, with what thoughts. With our thoughts, we create not only our reality, but also the existence of our loved ones. The cleaner and calmer and more positive the inner mood of everyone, the better life will be.

Q. How is it better for a grandmother to live with her mother and Stas or separately?

A. Three generations under one roof. You need to feel your own feelings. Previously, in all countries and religions, it was common that several generations live under one roof, learn from each other, and pass on experience. It's simpler and easier. But times change, circumstances change. In some situations it is convenient, in some it is not. It's hard to say for sure which is better. It should be comfortable for everyone who is under one roof. There should not be a feeling of discomfort that I interfere, they interfere with me. It would be better to live separately, but not far away.

Q. How many children will Stas have?

Q. Boys or girls?

A. Children will be of different sexes, there will be both a boy and a girl. The first will be a girl, and then there will be a boy.

If you notice a spelling mistake, please highlight it with the mouse and click Ctrl+Enter.

The current programs for educational institutions are continuously updated and modified. The material is not easy and students may simply not perceive it. Quite often it happens that a child listens to well-read information, but is unable to understand it, so it is necessary to analyze the material covered at school already at home. If in the elementary grades it is still possible to understand what is at stake, then in the older ones it is no longer easy. Thus, the child begins to be afraid of the educational institution, since the homework is not done, the teachers give deuces, and the parents chastise for them. The psyche of a teenager cannot stand such stress and there is a fear of the school, which needs to be disposed of urgently.

Fear of school may arise due to the inability of the child to master the educational material

What is School Fear

The fear of going to school is called didaskaleinophobia, it is characteristic only of schoolchildren and appears only at the time of class. In essence, the concept of didaskaleinophobia literally stands for "fear of school". Formally, such a phobia may not immediately declare itself in full. Often parents perceive the reluctance to go to school as laziness, a desire to take a walk or do something else, but not the educational process. But it is precisely at these moments that one should not turn away from the problem, it is necessary to take it with all responsibility and find the real reason for absenteeism. This is especially pronounced in elementary school, because. the child has not yet fully adapted to the training and requirements, and heavy workloads without family support can lead to the appearance of a phobia

The mistake of parents is that they consider a phobia to be a manifestation in all spheres of a child's life at once, and fear appears in a particular case. If you eliminate the irritant, then the fear goes away by itself. It is impossible to neglect such manifestations in a teenager. The longer time and attention is not given to the problem, the more strongly it grows into consciousness. Later, it can develop into severe anger, which is associated with a panic state and depression.

Signs and symptoms of having a phobia

The most complete and accurate description of the fear of school was described by Khersov. He believed that the problems began with questionable complaints about the educational institution, or with her forced attendance. Later, this develops into a complete refusal to go to school, not taking into account persuasion from the parents. The closer the time to go to school, the more the behavior and mood of the child changes. Many children say that they have a desire to go to school, but when they need it, nothing comes out because of panic attacks.

Parents should sound the alarm when these kinds of symptoms appear:

• asphyxiation attacks;
• interrupted breathing;
• too fast pulse and heart rate;
• strong sweating;
• chills and shudders;
• the child becomes paler, there is a breakdown, which can lead to loss of consciousness.

In addition to the above, a teenager may experience nausea, dizziness and intestinal colic.

Surprisingly, in the presence of this disease, the child may experience fear before the seizures of fear itself. In addition, the older the child, the stronger these manifestations can be.

Children can rush around the room at such moments, his behavior will be panicky, or he will be motionless for a long time. Such signs are difficult to date to whims and should be given due attention to them.

Asphyxia is one of the signs of a phobia

Reasons for fear

It is foolish to think that manifestations of fear before going to school can appear as a result of one stressful situation that occurred in an educational institution. In most cases, this is a protracted process, where the student is constantly exposed to negative factors that cannot be immediately eliminated:

• bullying from classmates that teachers ignore;
• cruelty towards a child;
• ridicule;
• endless threats from high school students;
• high employment and heavy loads (physical and mental);
• psychological reproaches from the side of teachers.

There are non-standard symptoms of didaskaleinophobia. It happens that a phobia occurs when a student experiences a panic, thinking that trouble can happen to his parents at the time of his absence. It may be that quarrels among relatives and troubles sink into the student’s head so much that at school he cannot get rid of them, trying to resolve their difficulties for relatives, therefore he does not want to attend an educational institution. Under any circumstances, the school is the main period of the student's socialization, so the fear of school must be overcome.

School workload may be one of the causes of frustration

How to overcome the fear of going to school

Most often, a student does not have the opportunity to fully understand exactly how didaskaleinophobia manifests itself, how to overcome it and eliminate it forever, what really prevents him from attending an educational institution. Based on this, the help of a professional is needed. In these cases, you should seek help from professionals in this field. First of all, these are child psychologists who can gradually determine all the reasons for such behavior in a child. A psychologist can explain how to get rid of pressure from classmates or discourage them. It will educate and change the student's views on the world so that he can look at the problem from a different angle and eliminate it on his own. If a child is very afraid for his parents, then a professional will be able to explain to him what to do when his relatives are not around.

In combination with the work of a psychologist, the student is prescribed certain antidepressants, physical therapy, or other exercises that will distract the child from the problem. Physical education can help a child overcome self-doubt.

If the onslaught comes from the family, then it is important to have conversations with relatives. Close people are obliged to reconsider their attitude towards their own child and try to solve the problem without interfering with the child in it.

Most parents, when they hear from specialists that their child is afraid of school, breathe a sigh of relief - the problem is not so serious. Only this is the beginning of a complex psychological illness that can develop into something more. If this trouble is not addressed in time, then the child will not want to attend school at all, up to suicidal tendencies or running away from home. This will not happen immediately, but it should not be brought to this point. Any fear can be eradicated by finding it and eliminating it. Didaskaleinophobia is no exception if you seek the help of a highly qualified specialist in this field. He will be able to give the necessary advice:

Transfer your child to homeschooling. This is necessary and important, because the child must have the necessary knowledge.

Do not scold him for some weaknesses - the indignation of relatives will only aggravate the situation. Only with the help of patience and sympathy can one cope with the psychological problems of a student.

The child must be supported, even if he received a bad grade. It is necessary to demonstrate that there is nothing terrible in this, everything can be corrected by better preparation of the material covered.

A little reminder to parents! In order for this phobia to be eliminated, parents should start with themselves, only relatives will help the student eliminate the fear. There should be a favorable atmosphere, trust and mutual understanding in the family circle.

Close people are obliged to show attention and patience, not to blame the child for all his failures. Having overcome the fears of constantly being guilty before the parents, the child will have confidence in support and protection. At school, he will find a common language with those children who will accept him for who he is, and he will learn to resist all his enemies. He will be interested in going to school. It is important to convey to the child that he will not be perfect for everyone, which means that you should not always listen to everyone's opinion.

If you noticed that the child's behavior is similar to the symptoms described above, then take the necessary measures, think about the microclimate in the family. You should analyze your own behavior, since quite often children copy the behavior of their loved ones. Based on this, you need to set an example for children based on their own behavior, and this will help them achieve unprecedented heights and overcome a lot of difficulties. It is necessary to communicate a lot with the child, learn about his problems and not let him withdraw into himself.

In the life of every kid there comes a moment when he grows up and from yesterday's kindergartener turns into a first grader. It would seem that both mom and dad were preparing for school, and in kindergarten the teacher tried to teach everything that a first grade student should know, but there is still a feeling of fear of school.

Sometimes the children themselves cannot explain what caused it, because friends will study with him, and he went to preparatory courses, met the teacher. But the feeling of fear does not disappear. Some kids are even able to throw a tantrum before going to school or cling to their mother's hand and not let go when she, after seeing her child to school, walks towards the exit of the building.

School scares the unknown...

Parents should not worry about such scenes. This is absolutely normal. After all, the first year of school is considered the most difficult for students. This is a turning point in a child's life. After all, with the advent of the school, the usual life of the child changes dramatically. The workload increases, new relationships are formed, daily games are replaced by training sessions. For the baby, all this is a lot of stress. He needs some time to adapt to the new conditions.

Let's find out what exactly can scare your child.

First, it is an increased workload. This is not only physical, but also psycho-emotional. Just yesterday, the kid played games with friends, and today he should already receive knowledge and confirm it daily with his answers to the assessment. Many academic disciplines are a big challenge for a child, because each subject teaches something different and requires certain responsibilities in the classroom. Sometimes even high IQ students get lost and anxious.

Secondly, when a child goes to school, he realizes that his responsibility increases. Now you can't just "leave the game". It has special requirements that must be met. Also in his life there is such a thing as "school mode". And it will also have to be followed. You can't choose which lessons to go to and which not to.

Allow him to invite classmates to visit. This will help the child not to lose position in society, and thus he will not be deprived of communication with peers. In addition, children can help your child keep up with learning new material. Studying in a team is a great way to learn a new topic.

Remember that you can always support your child by offering your services to the school. For example, by becoming a member of a parent committee or by participating with a class on a camping trip that is scheduled for the weekend. The presence of the mother will cheer up the baby, and he will behave more freely.

As a last resort, you can always talk to the class teacher and talk about the problem of fear of school. The teacher will listen and help. If you act together with the teacher, the adaptation of the child will be easier and faster.