Where to meet a good guy. How to find a Man (step by step instructions from a man)

Dear readers, I welcome you to the site In My Home! In the modern world, marriage has ceased to be an obligatory item in the life program of every self-respecting woman. Young people find it easier to look at what still seemed unshakable to our parents: career growth and self-realization have pushed the family as the main goal of life.

However, apart from the official terms and fashion trends, women still want to have a reliable support in life, a cozy home and the very quiet haven where you happily return after a busy day at work. So it doesn't matter whether they are looking for an official husband and a stamp in their passport or just a partner for life.

Unfortunately, despite all the changes in the worldview, the problem with the fact that many cannot find a loved one remains. In this article we will try to figure out how to find a husband and where to do it.

What kind of husband do you need

First, it is worth deciding: who are you looking for, who do you need?

Not all women dream of finding a husband. Someone wants to have just a young man and not tie themselves with long-term ties. Someone already has enough experience in serious relationships to understand that they need a reliable partner for life, who can share possible difficulties and help raise children.

Why do you want to get married

There are a lot of reasons for getting married. Every woman has her own story, her dreams and her own requirements. It may be a natural need to have a close-minded person with whom you can talk about anything, the need for help in everyday life, a thirst for love and care. Someone is still under pressure from stereotypes that “you are already over 30, but your husband is still not there,” someone is looking for financial stability and solvency in a spouse.

In order for your search for a worthy life partner to be crowned with success, you need to honestly determine for yourself why you want to get married. The answer to this question is your own business, which your friends and acquaintances do not need to know about, but a clear understanding of the goal will help you not to waste time and end up with nothing.

For example, finding a soul mate for intimate conversations about the latest trends in art is unlikely to be successful at a conference on sports equipment.

If you are looking for a life support and financial well-being in a man, then you are unlikely to be satisfied with a marriage with an unknown musician hovering in the clouds. By the way, on our website we have prepared a separate material on how to find a rich husband.

In general, setting a goal for yourself precisely is task number one.

To find a compromise

It is also important to understand that ideal princes on white horses exist only in melodramas. It will be very difficult to find a person who would satisfy absolutely all your requests. Learn to compromise and calmly accept the fact that you will have to give in to something, because a successful businessman is unlikely to find time for daily washing up or cleaning.

Do not expect a man to completely share your interests. Do not give up on a young man whose only drawback is that he does not listen to your favorite music or watch fashion shows. For these unprincipled shortcomings in family life, there are girlfriends.

Age

Our age also leaves a certain imprint on what kind of husband we are looking for.

If you are from 20 to 30 years old, then the wishes, as a rule, do not differ from those that are usually presented to young guys. A man should respect his soul mate, take care of her, have common hobbies.

For women after 35 or 40 years old, it becomes more difficult to meet their ideal. Our character at this age has already been formed, we have overgrown with habits and beliefs, therefore, it is more and more problematic to adapt to another person. Unsuccessful attempts to create a family in the past, as well as children from previous relationships, can be added to the established way of life.

And starting the search for a new husband, all these points should be taken into account in order to correctly formulate the requirements for a potential chosen one.

Visualization of desires

Psychologists believe that making a wish map also helps in finding a husband. Personally, I don't really rely on such visualizations, but if it helps someone, then why not?

To draw up such a map, you need to take a sheet of paper and draw or place on it a portrait of your ideal chosen one cut out from some magazine with those attributes that you consider important to yourself. This will help you better understand whether its external beauty, real estate, expensive cars, a good education, or the ability to work around the house are important to you.

You also need to put yourself on the map for the visualization to be complete.

Try not to show this collage to anyone, and treat it more like a formalized action plan.

Remember that just sticking a desire on paper isn't enough - it's just a way to better understand yourself and your needs. Next, you will have to focus on the real work to make your dream come true.

Identifying the pros and cons

After you have figured out the subject of your search, you need to think about how your ideal chosen one will see you.

Men, fortunately, are not at all as primitive as their caricatured images in anecdotes. It is not enough just to have a doll-like face, a wasp waist and long legs to successfully marry. Numerous diplomas of prestigious education will not be a guarantee of marriage.

This has its own plus: women with an ordinary appearance and a successful career should not a priori put an end to themselves.

Everyone has a chance for a good husband, the main thing is to soberly assess their capabilities and learn to present themselves in a favorable light.

There is another trick that psychologists have shared with us. It consists in a schematic description of all your advantages and disadvantages.

Take a piece of paper, divide it into two halves. On the one hand, list all those qualities that make you stand out from the crowd and make you interesting in the eyes of the opposite sex. For example, a sense of humor, financial success, the ability to cook deliciously, excellent physical shape.

In another column, you will have to write honestly about your shortcomings. This may be excessive shyness, inability to manage the house, dislike of ironing, or excessive independence.

Dealing with flaws

Try to critically evaluate the result of such cataloging. Even if the positives outweigh your weaknesses, the disadvantages are still worth working on. This will not only help in finding a loved one, but will also add confidence in yourself.

If the disadvantages lie in the plane of psychology, it is worth seeking professional advice. Do not be afraid of psychologists, a good specialist will be able to explain how best to overcome your inner fears and insecurities, how to properly present yourself and your dignity, and will also advise the necessary trainings.

Remember, it's never too late to learn. If the chef among you is so-so - sign up for cooking classes. You will not only solve the problem, but also make new friends!

Your physical form is not satisfied - buy a subscription to a sports club. This will prepare you to meet the man of your dreams, be proud of yourself, become more confident and make a lot of new acquaintances.

Take advantage of the advantages

Remember, it's not just your weaknesses that are worth working. Even your dignity, without proper attention, will not be able to play on your side.

Carefully review the characteristics that you listed as positive, and decide how you can use them in the most beneficial way in your search for a spouse.

For example, you have a beautiful figure. So you don't need to hide her behind shapeless sweaters. Men, of course, are not so simple, but no one has yet canceled the axiom that they “love with their eyes”.

Are you good at football? Fine! In various bars, during important matches, the concentration of men per square meter breaks all records, and you can easily strike up a conversation in such an atmosphere.

Where to find a husband

So, you figured out your task and found out your strengths. Now you need to start putting all this into practice.

Where to look for a future husband?

In the Internet

In modern conditions, virtual dating should be considered as one of the main options. If earlier this method caused the grins of friends and the horror of parents, now everyone is resigned to it. Mobile dating apps have become part of our lives and have become almost commonplace. Therefore, you do not need to wrinkle your nose, but take seriously how your profile is designed on social networks such as Facebook, VKontakte or Tinder.

The information that you want to provide to potential suitors must meet the criteria by which you will select.

Remember that you should not give too detailed information: this will not play a special role at the first meeting, but it can be dangerous.

Your profile photos shouldn't look like ID shots, but they shouldn't be overly explicit either. It is necessary to observe the measure in everything.

Of course, you should exercise some caution before agreeing to a first date in reality. Try to carefully look through his pages on social networks and make an appointment in crowded places.

In fact, the internet is full of normal guys, and the most that can happen to you is not a very fun evening. But who does not take risks, he does not drink champagne, right?

At work or school

A bit old-fashioned, but still a win-win.

When you work or study together, you have a lot of common topics for conversation, and it is difficult to consider someone with whom you spend most of your time every day, constantly communicate on the phone, overcome all kinds of deadlines and project deliveries, as a stranger.

In the case of romance in the workplace, you should consider your boss's attitude towards romance between employees, as well as the fact that if your romance does not end with the Mendelssohn March, you will still have to face each other in the office every day.

Fast dates

In addition to the usual places like cafes and bars, you can try the so-called “speed dating”. This idea came to us from the USA, and its essence lies in the fact that men and women who want to get acquainted, gather in one place and communicate with each other, observing a certain time frame.

At first glance, this seems a little artificial, but on the other hand, this approach has its advantages. All people who have come on such dates are determined to make new acquaintances, and are in search of a partner. Even if you are shy, you will be forced to tell about yourself and do it as quickly as possible, which means that you will have to concentrate and show your best qualities.

Make yourself some simple rules.

1. Talk to at least three men you don't know every day. Do not invent ornate schemes, banal phrases like "what time is it now?" or "how to get to the library?" Do not forget to smile, and if this tactic still does not help with the search for a husband, you will at least get rid of shyness.
2. Be positive and really believe that you will find your prince sooner or later.
3. Take care of yourself, dress neatly and elegantly, even if you are just going to the store for milk or to buy a book. Accidental encounters often become life-changing. Of course, we are not even talking about taking out the trash in an evening dress and appropriate make-up, but clean hair and neat clothes have not stopped anyone yet.
4. Agree to a date, even if it seems to you that the applicant is not up to your standards in some way. First, you can't really appreciate a man if you don't give him a chance to have at least a cup of coffee with you. Who knows, maybe fate has prepared a surprise for you, and he is your real prince. And secondly, you can say “no” even after the first date.

Conclusion

There is a good saying “to get married do not attack, as if married do not disappear”. Obviously, if you clearly set a goal for yourself and make enough efforts, then there is a husband for every woman. The main thing in such an important matter is not to have a stamp in the passport as an end in itself, but to seriously approach the choice of a life partner. I hope that my advice will be useful to you in this difficult search.

I'm 33. Man. I'll tell you about my point of view. Until recently, I was hanging out on various dating sites and the like. There were no serious thoughts about further plans for life. And everything that concerns dating on the Internet and in real life, I know inside and out. Conducted many different experiments, opinion polls and other nonsense. In real life, I get to know each other without any problems, in a day I could collect up to 10 numbers, not just some, but beautiful girls 20 - 30 years old.

But it all ended with the fact that when they found out that I was not in a car, they stopped communicating. And it’s like it’s not written on my forehead that I’m a rich man, I don’t wear expensive clothes, in general, nothing that could suggest such an idea. As for the Internet. The fact is that my photos do not turn out quite the way I look in real life. I do not know how and do not like to take pictures. Himself not a freak, everything is in place, but not sweet, not cute. And according to the results of experiments on dating sites, girls just fall at their feet with sweet pictures, cute guys.

They themselves offer a meeting, and even agree to obscene offers. Although everything in the questionnaires is indicated in the same way, and the type of communication is the same. And from their profile, where my photos, about 5 girls answer a hundred messages. The profile of a cute guy, about 80% of girls answer a hundred messages. The content of the questionnaires, photos, everything is almost monotonous, nothing superfluous, nothing is embellished anywhere, so that the results are more transparent. Dialogues in both versions began in the same way, so that it was not so that they say one clerk from God, and interested, and the second boring, and not interested. In general, at the expense of the Internet, something like that.

On the Internet, the wrapper comes first. So, let's go further. With regards to the real, and the car. Yes, of course everything is correct, that a man is a breadwinner, there must be money, and all that. And a car is like an indicator that a man can mine. Now the most interesting thing: I have been a small businessman for the last three or four years. Stable average income. Which gave me the opportunity not to do anything at all, and to do nothing but hang out on dating sites and walk around the shopping center, cafes, exhibitions and get acquainted. It's not a problem to buy a car, but the problem is that I am constantly on the move.

Today here, tomorrow in another country, I can get stuck there for a month, then two months in another city. But to buy a good car, and if you urgently need to fly away, sell it at an unrealistic markdown, this is unacceptable for me, for my enterprising brain. And so every month it is not an option to buy and it is doubly cheap to almost sell a car, if only the ladies could see that I have money. Move on. Now I took up a new activity, let's say more seriously. And I retired from all social networks, all sites, and let's just say my worldview already "forbids" me to be frivolous.

For me, now a man and social networks and dating sites are two parallel ones that will never intersect. I use my phone without the Internet, I am thinking in general to limit myself only to e-mail. And no connection. Who needs to be found with whom to contact, I will find a way to contact. Such thinking at this stage. My work involves almost full employment all day long.

The fact that I am here on your site, I typed into the search engine "where to meet a man" so that I could find articles for women, although everything is clear anyway, in the same place as usual. But for me, none of the options are suitable yet. And imagine that up to 33 years old I am practically alone like this, then that I periodically have fleeting acquaintances, I do not consider this. Although I know that I'm not some bald, pot-bellied, smelly freak, and I'm not a bum who can't invite a lady for coffee, and I'm not a nerd who can't put two words together.

I think that I quite fit into the very "female" framework of a normal man. But somehow it does not grow together with me. And now it’s like that in general, I don’t know what and how it will be. When I'm practically cut off from the whole world. I don’t know what’s to blame? Either society has become more cynical, greedy, or whatever it might be called. About 5 years ago, I remember everything was somehow different, in real life it was possible to get acquainted, and the relationship developed, and now it is even somehow wild for some. Perhaps this is the Internet, and money spoils society. The very concept of civilization in a person kills human spiritual qualities. That is, the higher the civilization, the lower the humanity, the higher the thirst for money, greed. Material values ​​come to the fore. I myself feel what I was like when my salary was less than 30 thousand rubles a month. And what I am now. I stop feeling joy and euphoria in any little things, for example, just sitting on the seashore in the evening, or sitting with friends in a regular bar. Everything became somehow tasteless or insipid. And the fact that the site does not write to me, it has nothing to do with this of course. There are thoughts about creating a family, and not on anyone, but to find all the same, and make a beautiful daughter.

So far, nothing comes to mind how to do this, taking into account all of the above. On the site, my pictures may radiate some kind of energy, then why in real life they get to know each other willingly, but everything ends with the "material" ... A riddle for me. Maybe this is God's plan for me. In general, I am a little jealous of the cute guys who are allowed to do everything on the dating site. When you feel how girls behave in an unusual way, you feel that you are so much interested, the inner world fills with light, as if it is blooming.

And so - it grows gloomy. And yet, when I travel, I often visit all kinds of hotels, youth hostels, this can be said to be my strong point. Making a bunch of new friends, necessarily new relationships with girls. Where no one is interested in whether you have a car or not, where sympathy simply arises and people get to know each other. And now, with my new activity, it will no longer be an option to travel to hotels and hostels. I don't ask anyone for advice, I think that whatever is being done for the better, it means that all this is being prepared for something. I just decided to share so that the girls do not get hung up on cars, and do not judge by the pictures on dating sites, but feel bad about it live.

Friends, this is not an applied article. There are no specifics and step-by-step instructions on how to find happiness. The article is the author's thoughts without any claim to originality and genius. Low expectations are the key to restful sleep. :)

Introduction

My friends are divided into two camps: while some willingly share their experiences and give wise advice on how to get married, others sigh that there are no normal men left in this world.

You know, if I didn’t personally know these all-round beautiful girls from the group of disappointed, I could safely assume that they overcharge themselves or leave no chance for normal guys. But it seems that the point is different.

Maybe some girls just tend to notice the wrong men? We fall in love with the wrong people, and then we ourselves suffer and cry at night. Yes, of course, there are not the most simple situations in life. But, to be honest, there is no such thing as someone's fault.

Where to find a normal guy

Well, okay, once you took it and grew up. I understood and accepted that you like pompous assholes. But you get tired of this too. Any drama, even the most florid, sometimes overwhelms, and you want something normal and real. And then a reasonable question arises: where and how to find a normal guy?

If there was some magical place, sort of, where all normal men would be hidden, then, probably, the girls would have already lined up worse than for the clothes of the new H&M collection with some famous designer. The girls who graduated from the courses of the guru of women's practices Pavel Rakov would definitely be brought there on special buses, and all broken hearts would be sent to forced rehabilitation.

Alas, there is no such place for concentrated masculine power. Or I don’t know about him. It is clear that all key life meetings always happen completely randomly and unpredictably. But here is a simple applied question: is it possible to increase this probability by artificial means?

Girlish thoughts out loud

I went to the people (on Telegram) and wrote to my friends with a request to tell them where they generally meet and are looking for non-random connections. The girls' reaction was funny: from “Well, they communicated well, Anh, what are you starting” to “A very difficult question. I have never met normal people. " Summed up the girlfriend who wrote: "Oh, Anh, normal guys are an endangered species."

Among the popular answers to the question of where to meet, if you are very lucky, featured university, work, hobby clubs, car services, sports clubs, friendly parties, bars and cafes. One girlfriend suggested that Romeo could be safely guarded on some fashionable intellectual tus, although the girl herself admitted that "she's not working yet."

Places vs life hacks

So what can help you meet a normal dude?

1. Dream of meeting HIM. Get discouraged and don't expect anything

It is very important to live with the thought that somewhere in this huge world there is definitely a HE, with whom you have fun, comfortable, free and cool, like with friends. At the same time, there is no idealization of the world. We all always fall in love with the wrong people, and many girls are afraid to fall in love more than guys. In life, probably everything comes when you let go. You will be disappointed in everything and stupidly score, you do not expect anything.

Usually, the most amazing stories are shot, when I'm not even sure that he will call back after a date.

In general, you just need to believe that one day you will meet someone with whom you can be yourself. Someone who loves your friends. Someone with whom you can breathe easily. And if you have already met him, he will not let you leave (read: do not let him go for anything). At the same time, a special emphasis on the fact that it is advisable to be disappointed in everything before the cherished meeting and not wait. Just live, and there, you see, and the prince on the horizon.

2. Visualize

If you don’t know where are you going, you might end up somewhere else.

The main idea: in order to find something, you need to clearly know what we are actually looking for. They say visualization is a really working thing.

So, girls, you need to tune in to the correct Zen and imagine who you want to be with, what you want in the end from him. You imagine all the important qualities of the betrothed, but, most importantly, not from the opposite, that is, without any "not" particles. For example, if you want a tall brunette, ask for a tall brunette, and not "not a blonde of average height, the main thing is not to be very short." Only real qualities, without negativity and denial. And then you write all this on a piece of paper and send a message to the Universe, which will definitely not let you down. Yes, it might take her some time to find her dream boyfriend. But Moscow, you know, was not built immediately.

Of the important: don't get confused in the testimony, girls! We ask the same thing, we say it out loud, otherwise the universe will get confused.

Another life hack: sometimes it's useful to ask your friends to introduce you to someone, well, to check the spell. The main thing is not friends: it doesn't work. Exactly boyfriend friends.

3. Don't be afraid to take the first step.

It's funny that there are two diametrically opposite opinions on this matter. One friend (married, raising a son) has long urged everyone and me to give up on social conventions and says that, in fact, in her life situation she took the first step, while she does not regret anything. Another girlfriend (not married, no boyfriend) recently came to the conclusion that all her first steps did not lead to anything good.

I do not have a personal significant record of the first steps to judge their success. But, I confess, I myself have always been scared to take the first step. It seemed that if a guy doesn't do it himself, then he probably doesn't need it. Why would I offer something that he potentially does not need? My mother always told me: "Never ask for anything, everyone will come and give them themselves." So: they won't.

Girls, maybe you, like me, live with the philosophy of a proud heron, and normal guys don't even catch up that we might like them?

4. Sign up already on Tinder

Do not forget that many guys are tormented in the same way by the question: where to find a normal girl? And as my boyfriend stats show, a lot of normal guys check in for general fun. And what if you are exactly the one with whom not only fun, but also happily ever after?

And so you dreamed, visualized, realized that the first step is not dumb. Come on, do it! Forward to the barricades!

And yes, I myself would not believe it if the number of stories “met on Tinder - happy together for 2, 3, x years” among my own acquaintances did not grow exponentially. Important: Tinder is an example of an easy way to hook up dates. It doesn't matter where you find them, it is important that you go to them at all.

A reasonable question: can you get something normal from dating on the Internet? I will answer with the words of my friend's American uncle Christina, who recently wrote on my Facebook wall and instantly fell in love with my friends:

A man for a serious relationship does not lie on the road. Such a fossil must be washed like gold. It is not necessary to go to Kolyma - you can try closer to home. We'll talk about the places where good guys live.

TOP 5 places for dating

Where to meet the rich

Don't take the bull by the horns

Do not swing right

Don't talk about your ex

Do not bloom

Have sex

Selection of a dating site

Geography of habitat: where to meet a guy for a serious relationship

Do not think that a rare kind of "man for a serious relationship" is found in some special places. Occurs even on the street. The question is the amount of time spent searching. The main thing is to connect the excitement to the business, so that a tedious search turns into an exciting leisure time like shopping. And still. It is better to go to a geographically favorable region for gold. The chances of washing something good on Bolshaya Shaldinka are much higher than pouring from empty to empty at the Mytishchi keys. Let's figure out where the serious guys are concentrated, who can be taken into circulation in accordance with the master plan.

TOP 5 places for dating

• Oh, sport you are strength and - a magnet for guys. Boxing matches, golf, football, ski resort - men love it all, which means you love it too. Should. You can always choose leisure activities within your means. Not enough for the resort, go to the match. Or to the gym - a place literally drenched in testosterone.
• The next territorial group, where the number of guys per square meter goes off scale, is the places of men's leisure. Men relax on hunting, fishing, in the chess club, bowling, billiard room. Choose yourself - or learn to pull the line, erotically leaving your hip, or a cue in your hands.
• If boxing or billiards is absolutely not suitable, look for a prince at trainings. MBA, financial analytics, foreign language courses are a priori attended by serious people. Razdolbai are usually happy with their current qualifications and rarely improve them. By the way, a great plan is Chinese courses. There will definitely be promising, purposeful and persistent men.
• Pay attention to the contingent of your office. Why go to work idle. If in your company all decent men are already boiling borscht (snapped up), focus on related enterprises. You can quickly find out what's going on around you in the smoking room. For the sake of such a case, why not raise it. Not a drag, of course.
• Mecca for acquaintances - supermarket closer to midnight. The place, of course, is not romantic, but profitable. Think for yourself, what should a "household" man do in a store alone at such a time? Closer to midnight, only loneliness wanders among the shelves and display cases in search of food. Understandably, the audience in the baby food departments is harshly ignored.

Where to meet the rich

Listerman knows the answer to the question of where to meet a rich man. “If the young lady is not a crocodile,” Pyotr Grigorievich will help. Not a crocodile means "to be beautiful, cheerful, sociable and reasonably smart." You can send a photo and resume on the official portal of the "main matchmaker of the country" Ochkarik.

All the rest, who are not interested in oligarchs, but in ordinary successful people, soberly assess their capabilities and, most importantly, actively act. A successful male is in demand, fastidious, distrustful and picky. Winning his favor is not easy. Good boobs and legs won't be enough. If everything is with you, swaying your hips appetizingly (instincts rule), move towards the reserved places.

Status men love winter sports. There is money for a prestigious ski resort - ahead and with a whistle. Wealthy men are forced (and some honestly love) to go to equestrian competitions, tennis and golf tournaments. In this case, it is enough to purchase a ticket. Or you can get a job in a large money company - oil and gas, finance or insurance. You pay nothing, but on the contrary, you get it. By the way, many opportunities for dating are offered by working in elite car dealerships. In general, he who seeks will find, or, as the French brothers say, qui cherche, trouve.

Online: where to meet a guy on the Internet and what it entails

While you are saving up money for Courchevel, I recommend starting a profile. What to write, what to keep silent about, which side to turn in the portfolio - in detail. Open and read. You can surf the Internet in search of relationships on social networks and even on forums. People, they are everywhere. But on the dating site - the target audience, that is, a high concentration of men who really want to meet.

Pros and cons of dating sites

In theory, a dating site is the perfect place to search. Filtered out what you need (height, weight, intentions) - and choose. In practice, scientists have meticulously researched the resource and have compiled a long list of its advantages and disadvantages. And those, and others - approximately equally. Here are some.

Advantage: dating site really provides a large base of people who purposefully want to meet. Millions of real partners and no geographic boundaries.

Flaw: Looking for a partner in such a crowd is still a pleasure. It is exhausting work to separate the wheat from the chaff. In addition, there is always an annoying feeling that the next one is better.

Advantage: On average, two out of ten novels start on the Internet. There are many real examples of how people met online and something came out of it.

Flaw: Every second online acquaintance is disappointing. Not to mention specific examples when they are bred for love for the purpose of profit.

Advantage: You can get acquainted at any convenient time. open around the clock, which plays into the hands of everyone in our time of troubles.

Flaw: A lot of wasted time on web communication, which in principle can be used with greater benefits for the soul, mind and body.

Advantage: On the Internet, you can relax and behave naturally - say what you think, forget about complexes, be yourself.

Flaw: The virtual world presents an opportunity to appear, and not to be, which some citizens enjoy with pleasure. About this, perhaps, separately.

How to avoid becoming a victim of a scammer

Anyone can be on the other side of the screen disguised as a man with serious intentions. Unassuming petty charlatan, enterprising big player, “molester and then extortionist.” We have already spoken about assorted love-based scams - so as not to be left with a broken heart and an empty wallet.

Safety rules are simple, of which there are three main ones:

• always keep your distance, especially when it seems that Fate itself has knocked on the door;
• keep with you - copies of your passport, bank card details, nude photos from your personal collection;
• don't be tempted - don't get fooled by talking about gold, diamonds, bitcoins and property.

Do not scare away: what absolutely should not be done in communicating with a guy

Even the gurus are wrong. The average girl gives errors on the rise, meanwhile, frightening off a candidate for a serious relationship is a piece of cake. The candidate, although a great guy, is vigilant. She makes sure that the princess does not suddenly become an evil witch, and the life of the prince does not turn into a terrible fairy tale. Behave as if you were in a shop with antique china - watch yourself and be careful.

Don't take the bull by the horns

He crumples, fiddles and does not dare - wait. Every man has the right to think and mature. In a state of "under", in response to assertiveness, he can withdraw. Here, and in general, there are fewer eggs in communicating with a guy. You're a girl.

Do not swing right

It is in your head that you have already moved in and got married, and he is obliged to spend maximum resources in your favor and by all means re-acquaint you with your relatives. He probably still has other plans - to take a closer look.

Don't talk about your ex

Even mattresses and mumbles will not tolerate third parties on their territory, and it does not matter that third parties are already common nouns with the hashtag "ex". Keep all "exs" with you in hard-to-reach places. And a password.

Do not bloom

Relationships that have become entangled are not yet a reason to dissolve. Do not go into the category of a woman in sweatpants and without a manicure, having overcome the candy-bouquet period. No outstretched knees, relaxed belly, unwashed head and unshaven armpits even after reading motivating body-positive articles (written from the evil one).

Have sex

Sex is not a recruitment tool or a bonus for good behavior. Sex is a pleasure for two. It is clear that the habit is second nature, and tempts to present sexuality for goods. And still. Beginnings for health, end in the same way and with the same frequency.

In fact, finding a man is not a problem. They say there are somewhere around 3.7 billion of them, and there are more every second. Another thing is important - what to do with it later. You need to invest in relationships. Consumerism is no longer trending. Although men still want to give. Good luck!

Greetings, dear readers!

Today we will discuss a topical issue for many girls. How to find your love in the form of a charming and attractive man, and such that once and for all. Well, or at least for the coming years ... Do you want? Then read on, and you will find out a lot of interesting things!

I am often asked where to meet a man for a serious relationship. Why am I being asked this question? I think that they are interested in all girls who are married and at least do not complain about their husbands. And if a married girl gives the impression of being very happy, then they ask her even more.

And it is right. The other day after another such question, I decided to tell on the blog all my thoughts about this. Only shhhh, this conversation between us girls, and in secret!

Every hunter wants to know where the pheasant is sitting? Remember this childish phrase? Traditionally, hunters are men. But in order to find the answer to our exciting question, right now we will briefly swap places with them. And let's look for the answer, where are the "pheasants" hiding, that is, men. By the way, there are plenty of them in our world!

Really meet smart, interesting and good. In general, someone with whom you will have butterflies soar in your stomach and words fly out of your head.

This is me for those who complain that after 18 ... 25 ... 30 ... years there is no chance to arrange a personal life.

Thinking that free, interesting men have been busy for a long time, and you have to live your whole life in splendid isolation, this is still a passive position. And it brings zero results. I believe that everything is in our hands, and therefore they cannot be omitted. And this means that if everything in your relationship is quiet, lonely and hopeless, then you need to fix it. And this is better than just whining to friends, complaining or waiting for a miracle.

It's time to act! But it is wise to do it like a woman! The difference between creating a good ground for dating is very different from imposing your candidacy on a man, and even more so hanging on his neck.

I am for the first method, and I will call it humane. In this case, the man does not feel like a hunted pheasant caught in the trap of a crazy girl. Therefore, I will write further only about him. So where can you find your love?

Passwords - appearances or opportunities around you

Your living space

Where do you live? Not a specific house-street, but a settlement. What is he? Is it a small village, or a huge metropolis, or something in between? What reputation does it have - a city of brides or a city of grooms, or half and half?

You yourself understand that if you live in a small village, whose name, with all due respect, is interesting only to its inhabitants, then there is practically no choice there. Here, either be content with what you have, or decide to move to larger cities or regional centers. Maybe you can come up with some other real option that I don't know about.

I'll tell you about a student friend. After receiving her education, she returned home and still could not find a life partner in her small town. There were much fewer men in it. And those who had not yet had time to "get ridiculous" were mostly spoiled by female attention. Everyone felt like a prince, because several girls were fighting for his attention at the same time.

In general, such proud men did not suit her friend in any way, it was not in her style to seek someone. And she decided the situation radically. She moved to live in the nearest large city. And there she soon successfully married.

It can be difficult to decide to move, but do not immediately dismiss this option. Take a real look at the situation, weigh the pros and cons, and then make a decision.

In any case, once you find yourself in an unfamiliar city, you will discover hidden reserves within yourself, and this is always beneficial. Or, at the very least, get memories that you will go through in retirement and tell your grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

Look around you

Where do you go often?

Maybe it's an office center, an institute, a sports complex, a cafe, an entertainment center, a library, after all, or something else?

Where do you spend a lot of time - at work, school or somewhere else? Who are the people you interact with often? These can be companies of friends and acquaintances, company clients, office employees, partners, colleagues, classmates, etc.

All this initially contains many opportunities for acquaintance. The more people around you and interacting with you, the more likely you are to find your person. Think about what you can add from all this to your life.

Maybe you should take part in a large-scale project from the university, or get out more actively to events and meetings with friends? In winter, go skiing or skating more often, and cycling and rollerblading in summer?

Remark. In many cities, mass rollerblading and bike runs are popular in the summer. You can spend time interestingly and find new acquaintances.

By the way, professions in which you need to communicate with many people are very conducive to the arrangement of your personal life. For girls, this can be the position of an office manager in a large company, a realtor, a manager in a travel company, a hairdresser for men, a secretary at the reception (dentistry, sports center, etc.) and many others.

In such positions, willingly or unwillingly, you learn to interact and find an approach to different people. And the ability to communicate well and adequately will certainly play a positive role in meeting people.

In general, the network of personal and professional contacts, active communication, visiting and business meetings remains one of the most effective methods.

A lot of girls met a worthy and beloved man in the circle of their acquaintances, in common companies, as well as working together or getting an education.

Internet, including social media

Global opportunities for everything, including the arrangement of personal life, are on the Internet. Among my acquaintances, every sixth or seventh found their love thanks to him.

At the same time, those who do not pin special hopes on him often successfully meet. If they go to dating sites, then rarely. But aptly.

In this method, you do not know who the person is impersonating on the other side of the screen, what is true in his words, and what is an illusion. But with a little common sense, everything falls into place.

Where to meet on the Internet? In addition to popular dating sites, there are all kinds of groups, publics of interest on social networks, forums where you can strike up a conversation with like-minded people, and then get to know them live.

I know examples of how couples met on forums about cars (by a specific brand and divided by city) and on a social network, finding common interests and topics of conversation.

Interests and passions

• If you are looking for a future Nobel Prize winner, then look for him in his native environment. The same thing, if you are interested in a funny party-goer, then it makes sense to go to parties and clubs. And in them she herself is able to stand out from the crowd.
• Do you need a type that is elusive for the usual perception, balancing on the verge of material and spiritual? Sign up for esoteric clubs, energy practices, participate in outdoor events, training your spirit and body.
• Interested in purposeful men? Go to trainings, conferences, master classes, seminars on personal growth. Good strong workouts are not for infantile guys. An exception when they promise a freebie. For example, they teach you how to make millions in one day.
• Exhibitions - branch, educational, scientific, technical, commercial and industrial. The same gradation by interests and level of education.

In general, the meaning is clear. Decide who you are interested in and think about how he spends his time, what are his interests. And go there. At the very least, you will find some new cognitive information and expand your horizons.

Recreation

These are all kinds of trips, excursions, concerts, exhibitions, bowling, billiards, kayaking, hiking, etc. During such events, everyone is in a positive mood and feels on the rise. A great opportunity to chat with interesting people.

Strong emotions bring people together in the first place. Try to overcome steep rapids on a kayak in the company of strangers or get driving emotions at a concert. After the experience, everyone who was around becomes close.

I will put beach holidays, clubs, etc. on a separate line. A dubious option for a long-term relationship, but there are exceptions.

Transport and everything related to it

More places to meet. Airports, planes, stations, trains, cars, motor ships. ... Take a closer look at a pretty neighbor. Maybe he is the one you need?

While I'm writing this article, surely someone met in this way.

Casual dating

They can be anytime, anywhere. When you don't expect them at all. And also according to the law of meanness, when you are not made up, dressed, combed and not perfumed with your favorite perfume. This is the case when fate itself is actively engaged in the arrangement of your personal life.

On this occasion, I love a joke - the longest relationship we have met in the winter. If he liked you in a thick sweater, bulky down jacket, with a red nose and frostbitten cheeks, then this is definitely love.

Summing up

Answer your questions:

• Who? That is, what kind of man are you interested in, what is his type, what does he do and is fond of?
• Where? Where does he spend his time? And where do you spend it yourself, and where should you take it?
• How? How can you be in the same place with him at the same time?

Write down the answers, think about what and how you need to change and start acting!

Be open to all possibilities! And it doesn't matter if you get to know each other through a coincidence or with a little planning. The main thing is the result.

I sincerely wish you a successful meeting with the best man for you! With the man of your dreams.

And when you meet, do not make the typical mistakes that spoil even the most wonderful relationship. You can read about this

Be happy!

And share your dating stories in the comments!

Subscribe to my blog, and see you soon.

I hug you, Anastasia Smolinets.