New Year's performance for the new year at school. Merry New Year's fairy-tale skits, plays, performances, performances for the New Year
On New Year's Eve, will there be a game of the "Cheerful and Resourceful Club" in your school? The audience and the jury will like mini-sketches based on fairy tales, cartoons, issues of the humorous magazine "Yeralash" and New Year's jokes for KVN at school, which play out various situations in the classroom.
To put such miniatures, you do not need to learn the texts by heart, the main thing is to convey the essence of what this or that character is saying.
How to arrange KVN at school for the New Year?
Baba Yaga and her daughter participate in the first school scene of the New Year's KVN. For this production, you will need original props - costumes and wigs for fairy tale characters.
The girl is crying, and Baba Yaga asks her what happened. The daughter replies that she wants to play the role of the Snow Maiden at the New Year's party, but she was told that she was not beautiful enough for that.
- Maybe the role of the Snow Queen will suit you? - Baba Yaga asks.
- Think for yourself: her outfit is a few kilograms of icicles, and her crown is from a broken mirror. This is a direct threat to my health!
- Well, we'll make a Snow Maiden out of you, - Baba Yaga agrees. First of all, Leshy will build a suitable hairstyle for you. Consider that he works with natural materials - driftwood and spruce cones, instead of varnish - resin.
Daughter of Baba Yaga:
- This is the case! But I also need a suitable outfit.
Baba Yaga:
- You, daughter, will have everything according to the first category: Cinderella's dress, crystal shoes ...
Daughter:
- What are you, mom, this is the century before last! I need a killer kit: a leather jacket, ripped jeans, a rhinestone bandana and Adidas sneakers.
Baba Yaga:
- Okay, daughter! Everything will be top class!
I will conjure new things
For a daughter's party.
Cracks, pax, fax! ...
At the end of this scene on the school KVN about Baba Yaga, her daughter appears in front of the audience in a new outfit and declares:
- What can I say, you see for yourself: beauty is a terrible power!
What other New Year's jokes are suitable for KVN at school?
Your performance in various competitions, be it "Welcome", "Homework" or "Captains Competition", will be diversified with comic scenes for the school KVN - for example, the following:
- This year my parents let me go for the first time to celebrate the New Year with friends. But after my mom found a shopping list for the holiday table in my jeans pocket, for some reason she and dad decided to join us.
- In our class there is a sign that if you lean out the window on New Year's Eve and ... learn all the tickets, you will definitely pass the exam.
- A good half of Russian teachers write comments in a diary, and the evil half also summons parents to school on the eve of the holiday.
- School is a place where teachers require students to know all subjects, while they themselves know one.
- Even in kindergarten we were sentenced: 11 years of school regime with confiscation of toys.
Funny miniatures for KVN for the 2019 New Year can be staged with the participation of Santa Claus and Snegurochka. Once they invited the guys to visit and began to ask them questions about the materials of the school curriculum.
***
Santa Claus:
- What are dense forests?
Schoolgirl:
- These are forests in which it is good to doze!
***
Snow Maiden:
- Who can name five wild animals?
The student pulls out his hand.
- A lion, a lioness and ... three lion cubs.
***
A letter from the boy to Santa Claus came to the mail:
- Santa Claus, send me a warm hat, mittens and socks for the New Year.
The postal workers took pity on the boy and bought him mittens and socks, but there was not enough money for a hat: you yourself know that salaries at the post office are small. The answer comes from the boy:
- Thank you, Santa Claus, for the mittens and socks, and it looks like my hat was stolen by evil aunts at the post office.
***
The boy writes a letter to Santa Claus:
"Hello Dedushka Moroz! The Chinese firecrackers that you sent me last time I received, and I really liked them. For this New Year, I would like to ask you to give me two fingers to my right hand and an eye! "
***
On New Year's Eve, Pinocchio approaches Pope Carlo and asks him to give him a toy animal. Papa Carlo thought and thought and made a toy. Buratino presented it and hears that he is crying.
- What happened? - asks Pope Carlo.
- I just wanted a toy - a dog or a cat, - Buratino answers, - and this toothy beaver is looking at me in a strange way!
Other jokes for the New Year's school KVN
***
- Now you will hear phrases that you will not hear on New Year's Eve ...
“Mom, Dad, stay at home, let's spend the New Year together”; "Girls, go, drink what you want and as much as you want, and we will sit here with my father."
***
Santa Claus does not exist. He lives to the fullest.
***
Emergency at school: at the New Year's celebrations, a boy dressed as a cucumber was bitten by a physical education instructor.
***
Seven-year-old Petya almost believed in Santa Claus, but dad laughed and his beard came off.
***
A boy from an elite kindergarten learns a New Year's rhyme:
- Hello, Santa Claus, beard made of cotton wool!
Present the fifth BMW X for the New Year!
***
A children's search engine Vugl was presented at the Tambov school for the New Year. Want to know a lot - google!
For the New Year, you can also act out scenes for KVN, which take place at school in the classroom.
***
At school, children write an essay on the topic "What would I ask Santa Claus for the New Year?"
Little Johnny:
- Dear Santa Claus! Make it so that we are not forced to write these stupid compositions anymore!
***
In the math exam, the teacher closely observes the students and from time to time kicks out those who have found cribs from the class.
The director looks into the class:
- How is the exam going? I think there are a lot of cheaters here!
Teacher:
- No, the amateurs have already gone home. Only professionals stayed here.
***
Teacher:
- Petrov, why do you look at your watch every minute?
Petrov:
- Because I am terribly worried that a stupid call would interrupt this incredibly interesting lesson at a completely inopportune time.
***
Teacher:
- Children, draw a square with a side of twelve centimeters!
Petrov:
- Marya Ivanovna, what kind of square is this - with one side ?!
***
Teacher:
- You, Sidorov, have an interesting work, but why is it not finished?
Sidorov:
- Because my father was urgently called to work!
***
Teacher:
- And now I will prove to you the Pythagorean theorem.
Petya from the back:
- Is it worth it, Ivan Ivanovich? We already believe you!
***
Teacher:
- Why is European time ahead of American time?
Petushkov stretches out his hand:
- Because America was discovered later!
***
The teacher says to the student:
- Let your grandfather come to school tomorrow!
- You mean father?
- No, let your grandfather come. I want to show him what gross mistakes his son makes with your homework.
The action of the last scene of the New Year's KVN takes place at school break.
Two high school girls are talking:
- You know, just at the thought of him my heart is pounding, my hands are shaking, my legs give way, I can't even speak.
- And what is his name?
- Unified State Exam!
For these small productions, you don't need complicated decorations. For example, if a scene is being played in a classroom, it is enough to hang up the blackboard and put up the desk. If the action takes place at recess, a corridor window is suitable as a decoration.
Help the guys who take part in the performances show their acting talents - and jokes for KVN at school for the New 2019 will not let your viewers get bored!
Do you want to arrange a fun and interesting New Year's party for your children? Consider our scripts. New Year 2019 is very soon and to make it easier for you to prepare for it, we have prepared for you children's New Year's scenarios 2019 - for matinees and school evenings. Celebrate New Year 2019 with fun!
A script for a matinee for organizing a New Year's Eve at an oriental-style school with wonders and adventures. Characters: schoolgirl Diana, her friend Latona, Scheherazade, Jafar, Jin, Aladdin, Sinbad. What is needed for the organization: decorations, fancy dress, musical accompaniment, a decorated Christmas tree, a sweet table.
The script was written for the New Year's party at a school matinee. An interesting journey into the era of Peter the Great, the story of the creation of the New Year. Characters: two presenters, Peter the Great, poetry reader, dance group. What is needed for the organization: streamer, confetti, a Christmas tree, fancy dress and masks, music and lyrics.
A script for celebrating the New Year for schoolchildren. An active fun game. Characters: Crane, Bear, the guys are carols. What is needed for the organization: costumes for the characters, decorations, musical accompaniment, a laid festive table.
Unusual school scenario of the New Year's celebration with interesting fortune telling and predictions. Characters: Snegurochka, Vendma-Megerochka, Witch Auda, Witch Irgola, three Snowmen, Snowflakes and Santa Claus. What is needed for the organization: New Year's attributes and costumes, musical accompaniment, sweets and candies, props for scenes.
The script is designed for schoolchildren. The story of the appearance of Christmas with songs, round dances and children's performances. Characters: presenter, Cat scientist, Joulupukki, Scrooge McDuck. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, props, a New Year tree, sketches of children prepared in advance, decoration of the hall, fancy dress.
Scenario of a children's New Year's party. Performance for schoolchildren. Acquaintance with the legendary hero of the fairytale Sherwood forest, Robin Hood. Interesting tasks and funny contests. Characters: Robin Hood and two hosts. Organization Needed: Sweets and candies, a decorated Christmas tree, character costumes, bow and arrows.
New Year's party for children is held in the school assembly hall. Script for schoolchildren. Characters: presenter, Zimushka - winter, Squirrel, Wolf, Fox, Hare, Snow Maiden, Santa Claus, Snowflakes, guys - readers of poems and montages. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, decoration of the hall, costumes of the participants of the scenes, prizes for the winners.
New Year's Eve celebration New Year's performance for high school children. Conducting children's contests and games. Characters: Pierrot, Santa Claus, Jester, Capricious Star, Button. What is needed for the organization: a sweet table, hall decoration, costumes of heroes, gifts for participants, a chest, a homemade podium, music.
School New Year's Eve script for children attending school. A performance for children with their favorite fairy-tale characters, turning into dancing and driving round dances. Characters: Snegurochka, Santa Claus, Hare, Fox, Mouse, Dog, Tiger Cub. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, decorations, fancy dress, sweet gifts, stage.
New Year's performance for high school students. The script for meeting the New Year with a circle of friends or employees. Conducting funny contests, interesting quizzes, happy greetings and toasts. Characters: Optimist, Pessimist. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, character costumes, prizes for winners, a festive table, music.
A dynamic festive scenario was developed for the New Year KVN between guests in accordance with all the rules of this famous game. A lot of jokes and fun for all participants of the holiday. Characters: presenter, five teams of players. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, cardboard numbers, prizes for the winners, a festive table.
The script for celebrating the New Year is designed for preschool children. New Year's party for the little ones. Carrying out funny games and contests for kids and their parents. Characters: Parsley, Harlequin, Ded Moroz, Snow Maiden. What is needed for the organization: a festive table, fancy dress, sweet gifts.
A script for a New Year's party for kindergarten. A festive show for children. Original ideas for the costumes of fairy-tale characters: Harlequin, Parsley, Snow Queen, Old ladies-merry, Dinka-ice. Characters: children. What is needed for the organization: a decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, character costumes, gifts for participants.
A holiday for friends. Competitive New Year's program with prizes and gifts, no vulgarity and bad jokes. Characters: host, Santa Claus and Snow Maiden. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, gifts for the winners, a banquet table, costumes for program participants.
Merry New Year's script for adults and children. An original meeting of the New Year in nature for the whole family with entertainment activities: contests and games. Characters: children and their parents. What is needed for the organization: New Year's melodies, a decorated Christmas tree, fancy dress, sweet prizes, cards with invitations, a table, chairs, firewood.
A universal scenario for a fun family celebration of the New Year 2019. A scenario for a large company of adults and children. Family contests and entertaining quizzes. Characters: parents and their children. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, sweet table, hall decoration, character costumes, prizes for winners.
New Year's dramatization of the New Year's celebration with fairy-tale characters. A script for the whole family. Entertainment activities are designed for a large company. Characters: Skomorokhi, Santa Claus, Winter, Baba Yaga. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, sweet gifts, prizes for the winners of competitions.
A script for a festive party for the New Year in the style of the 80s. Performance for adults and children. Incendiary dances until you drop, funny contests and quizzes. Characters: host, Santa Claus. What is needed for the organization: dance melodies, a decorated Christmas tree, character costumes, gifts for participants, a banquet table, props.
A script for a festive matinee for preschoolers. A perky and cheerful scene for children. Comic riddles, funny games, interesting contests, driving round dances and singing New Year's songs. Characters: Skomorokh, Baba Yaga, Snow Maiden, Ded Moroz. What is needed for the organization: music and lyrics, sweet prizes, costumes for the characters, scenery.
Scenario of meeting the New Year 2019 for children in elementary grades. Matinee for schoolchildren with fairy-tale characters of your favorite cartoons. Characters: Ivanushka the Fool, Koschey the Immortal, Baba Yaga, Snow White, Dwarfs, Nightingale - the Robber, Little Red Riding Hood. What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, hall decoration, fancy dress, sweet gifts.
Scenario for holding a New Year's Eve in elementary school. New Year's celebration for schoolchildren. Characters: Snegurochka, Santa Claus, Fairy, Baba Yaga, Little Red Riding Hood, Ivan the Fool, Nightingale the Robber, Koschey the Immortal, the Seven Dwarfs, Old Man Hottabych, Snow White. What is needed for the organization: New Year's melodies, a decorated Christmas tree, prizes for winners, a sweet table, decorations, New Year's attributes.
New Year's scenario was developed for a matinee at school. A fun show for children. Dramatization of the educational process. Characters: teacher, student troupe, support group. Organization Needs: Music and lyrics, character costumes, gifts for participants, chairs to simulate a class, wall calendar.
The script is designed to hold a matinee at school. Performance for children. Interesting plot, light humor, good ending. Characters: a group of children, "brothers". What is needed for the organization: musical accompaniment, an elegantly decorated Christmas tree, hall decoration, fancy dress, sweets and sweets, prizes for the winners.
We offer a variant of a children's New Year's holiday with Santa Claus and Snegurochka, the program includes riddles, active contests, songs and dance entertainment.
New Year's holiday script for children of different ages- universal, exciting and very funny, it is easy to organize and carry out in any group, especially since the musical accompaniment is attached (thanks to the author!)
New Year's holiday script
Under the soundtrack, Snegurochka enters the hall, examines the beautiful Christmas tree, the bright hall and draws attention to the children.
Snow Maiden:
Hello!
Happy holiday, my little friends!
You recognized me? Remember who I am?
Children (in chorus): Snow Maiden!
Snow Maiden: That's right, Snow Maiden!
And since I came to the kids,
So, the holiday is in the yard!
Everyone celebrates the New Year
They lead a round dance together,
Everyone is waiting for gifts and a miracle.
Well, it will be so today!
Children's New Year's noisemaker "So as not to freeze ..."
Let's plunge into a New Year's fairy tale,
But first, let's make some noise and warm up!
So that we do not freeze in the evil frost -
We hold on to the nose with our handles! (Snow Maiden shows)
So that there is no trouble with the doctors -
Rubbing frozen cheeks like this! (shows)
To keep the handles from freezing - clap! (claps his hands)
Now let's warm our legs and sink (shows)
And we'll tickle our neighbor a little (The Snow Maiden gently tickles several guys)
And, of course, we will laugh together! (ha ha ha)
And now, since you are warm, I have a question:
Who will add fun to everyone?
Children (in chorus): Santa Claus!
Snow Maiden: Yes, we really need Santa Claus,
Let's call him all together, together: "Grandfather Frost!"
Children (in chorus): Santa Claus!
(to download - click the file)
Under the song "Well, of course, Santa Claus" comes Santa Claus himself. He greets everyone, examines the tree, pours snow, throws a serpentine, slams a firecracker, etc. (Then the program Snegurochka and Santa Claus lead together)
Santa Claus: I'm glad to see my grandchildren again
After all, this is not the first time we celebrate the New Year,
And when they meet, what do they say to a friend?
Nice, simple word "hello"!
Guys, where is my fidget Snegurochka? Here she was, go !?
(The Snow Maiden is hiding behindSanta Claus and says now on the left, now on the right: "I am here").
Santa Claus: Oh, the Snow Maiden is a mischievous girl, has she been naughty? Enough!
All the guys are waiting for gifts, congratulations in the hall!
Although, probably, the girls and the boys here
The same as you, mischievous and mischievous?
Snow Maiden: Grandpa, is this how the holiday begins? The guys haven't seen you for a whole year, they were waiting for a meeting, and you tell them from the doorway that they, most likely, behave somehow differently ..
Santa Claus: Yes, I kindly scolded only a little, well, well, I'll ask them themselves. The kids are lovely, you must be awful little rascals?
(to download - click the file)
Snow Maiden: Grandpa, everyone knows that you are a good wizard.
Santa Claus: Yes. And I will tell you honestly: doing good miracles and making all kinds of transformations is so interesting.
Snow Maiden:But is it so hard - magic?
Santa Claus: Nothing like this. Let's try to turn into an animal or a bird.
Snow Maiden: Oh, how, grandpa?
Santa Claus: Very simple. Only the guys need to be more attentive. I will utter magic words, i.e. sing a song, and you guys, after the Snow Maiden and me, will repeat the magic movements. And so you will turn into an animal or a bird. Clear?
Active game "Transformation # 1 - Zoo"
(the smallest children are chosen. They walk in a circle one after another and repeat the movements after D. M. and Snow Maiden to the tune of the song "about a grasshopper")
(to download - click the file)
Here in a snowy winter, in the thicket of the forest Thicket of the forest, a gray ...wolf
Imagine, imagine a forest thicket
Imagine, imagine a gray wolf sneaking
In Australia, distant, on a low hill, so jumping on a low hill ... kangaroo
Imagine, imagine - on a low hill
Imagine, imagine - this is how a kangaroo jumps
Under gray foam, under blue water Under blue water, so it floats ... dolphin
Imagine, imagine - under blue water
Imagine, imagine - this is how a dolphin swims
From the balcony to the gazebo, and from the lantern to the branch And flies from the lantern to the branch ...sparrow
Imagine, imagine - and from a lantern to a branch
Imagine, imagine - a sparrow flies
Dancing by the den and not sparing his feet And not sparing his feet so stomping ... bear
Imagine, imagine - and not sparing your legs
Imagine, imagine - this is how a bear stomps
Santa Claus: Now we can make some magic more complicated.
(other participants are selected from the kids)
Active game "Transformation # 2 - Orchestra"
(a song is sung, and the children, together with D.M. and Sneguroka, play musical instruments - trumpet, violin and drum).
(to download - click the file)
Santa Claus: Also, in order for a wizard to complete all sorts of transformations, you need to be a little imaginative.
Snow Maiden: Why, grandfather, will they start teasing - "I imagined my tail between my legs"?
Santa Claus: I'm talking about those people who can imagine, i.e. submit anything you want. Listen to my story and imagine. Only first we need to choose our assistants - 7 people. and additionally 4-6 people. for the role of snowflakes.
(preferably, adult viewers are chosen to play the roles: Bee, Winnie the Pooh, the wolf and the hare, Cheburashka and Crocodile Gena, Cat Leopold and snowflakes. All characters wear hats-masks and each goes to his own soundtrack, instead of a barrel of honey, a balloon ).
Children's New Year's fairy tale - impromptu "Imagine"
Once upon a time there was a Snow Maiden. And she went to meet the New Year. The weather was wonderful. Light snowflakes swirled in the air. And then the Snow Maiden hears a buzz. - This is probably someone fly - thought the Snow Maiden. Indeed, it is a bee named Maya that flies and holds a barrel of honey in its paws. A bee flies up to the Snow Maiden, gives her a barrel of honey and says: "Treat your friends, Snow Maiden." And she flew away. As soon as she flew away, as the Snow Maiden hears, someone is waddling and groaning: "Wow, wow, wow." And this is Winnie the Pooh. Winnie the Pooh approached the Snow Maiden and said: "Treat me with a honey, Snow Maiden." As soon as he said this, suddenly a hare was running, followed by a hooligan wolf and shouting: "Well, hare, wait!" A hare with a wolf ran up, they also want honey. And then the knock of the wheels - that-that. A blue car rolls around, and on it ... Cheburashka and Gena the crocodile, and they say: "And leave us some honey too." Then there was a noise and din, everyone shouted: "Me, me, me." The Snow Maiden was confused that she almost dropped a barrel of honey from her hands. It's good that at this time a kind cat came up in slippers and with a bow around his neck and said: "Guys, let's live together!" And then they shared the medka equally for everyone. The animals ate sweet honey and clapped their hands for joy. Like this!
Dance under the sash
Santa Claus: Yes, you are noble imaginers, I want to see what kind of dancers you are.
(Guys go out) A dance is announced under my sash. You need to go back and forth under the sash to the music, dancing. The sash will gradually sink lower and lower, but you cannot touch it.
(Participants are selected for the dance competition or everyone who wishes, as well as assistants from among the adults who will hold the sash. The originality of the dance is evaluated).
Santa Claus: And what a beautiful Christmas tree you have. It is immediately evident that they were preparing for the New Year. Did you decorate the tree yourself? Do you know what to dress up with? I'll check it out now. I will offer different decorations, and you turn on your imagination, but be careful, tell me in response, if they decorate the Christmas tree with this, then "yes", and if they do not decorate, then "no"
How can we decorate a Christmas tree, we all know for sure
And what is possible and what is not - we will immediately guess:
Balls, beads and toys? (Yes)
Pies, compote and dryers? (Not)
Serpentine and tinsel? (Yes)
Skates, skis and play? (Not)
A multi-colored garland? (Yes)
And the snowflakes are light? (Yes)
Snow Maiden: And now Santa Claus will sing a song about a Christmas tree, only I need your help. You need to sing in the chorus the following words: "Like it, like the Christmas tree - a beauty!" Let's rehearse.
(everyone sings at a given tempo)
The song "Fir-tree is a beauty"
(recorded a version with vocals of Santa Claus and a chorus play with the children)
Lyrics
In the center of the hall, a beauty simply grew up
Well, tell me, guys, do you like the Christmas tree? - 2 times
Chorus (all together):
I like it, like the Christmas tree - beauty - 2 times
There are so many motley tinsel on the branches of her furry
Bell carved, multi-colored balls - 2 times
Chorus .
In a warm room, the snow does not melt, it happens in the New Year
And the guys lead a round dance in the hall near the Christmas tree - 2 times
Santa Claus : We will continue the holiday, we will play with you. And for this you need to create two teams - the team of D.M. and the Snegurochka team of 10 people. in each and two adults in each team for safety net.
→ New Year\u003e "url \u003d" http://scenarii.ru/scenario/index1.php?raz\u003d2&prazd\u003d1231&page\u003d1 "\u003e14.11.2018 | We looked at the script 1750 person
(music at the beginning. Sound of a blizzard)
DM: You can't see anything. Where to go? Where to run. We got lost.
Sn. And time goes by. Runs. Flies.
DM We need to overtake him. (music, running on the spot) Well, they were overtaken.
Snow Maiden: No
DM: Then he must be detained. ...
Scenario of an extracurricular event "Once on New Year's Eve ..." (for senior students)
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 7312 person
Buffoon 1
Attention! Attention!
An honorable meeting!
That fairy tales are interesting
Of course, everyone knows.
But a fairy tale is born,
Nobody will guess.
Buffoon 2
And hardly anyone knows
What happens on New Years
With heroes ...
Holiday script "New Year in the Magic Kingdom"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 7969 person
Fairy:
I'm not a sorceress, I'm just learning.
I know the basics of miracles by heart.
Do you want your eyes to shine with friendship?
Be a friend yourself, always a friend.
Do you want to make it more fun?
Share your smile yourself.
Do you want beautiful ...
New Year's scenario "New Year in the Olympic Village"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 3429 person
Music sounds, a witch comes out, begins to conjure to the music.
Witch:
In old tales, bad dreams
Sticky fear walks and wanders.
He lives in the hearts of people,
Weaves ropes for hearts.
Hide, hide, month, in a cloud,
Arrows on ...
Scene for the new year at the school "Control"
11.11.2018 | We looked at the script 1407 person
Scene for the new year at school
Interactive quiz game "Who is sad in the New Year?"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 2019 person
The melody "New Year's song" sounds
- Children, the melody of a song about a merry winter holiday sounds. You guessed which one?
- Do you like this holiday?
- With what mood do you greet the New Year?
- What do you think, is everyone having fun in the New Year?
1 slide. ...
Speech therapy lesson in the form of the quiz "Hello, guest winter!"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 437 person
Speech therapist: Guys, today we have a quiz. We'll play a little with you. To find out the topic of our quiz, you need to guess the riddle.
The cold came
Water turned into ice
Long-eared hare gray
Turned into a white hare
The bear stopped roaring
IN...
Extracurricular activity "Cool New Year"
16.12.2015 | We looked at the script 2278 person
The preparatory phase of the class New Year begins on the first day of the second academic quarter. On this day, a draw is held: each student gets the name of the student for whom he is preparing a New Year's gift. There are several rules: in - ...
New Year with the monkey Chita. Children's scenario of meeting the new year
13.12.2014 | We looked at the script 1912 person
Scene 1 In the foyer near the Christmas tree the Dog Abba.
Abba: Hello children! I am Abba's dog. Chita and I are helping Doctor Aibolit treat all the animals in the world. Do you children have animals at home? What kind? Well, name it! What are their names? (Children answer) And which of ...
Who is in charge of the New Year? Part 2
13.12.2014 | We looked at the script 1251 person
In the second part, all the characters enter the stage at once, stand and sit in their places. The words are pronounced in turn, in the same order (one by one going to the center of the stage). The appearance of all participants is no longer so solemn, but more unkempt. But the tone ...
See also funny poems about school for kids. The advantages of our funny sketches are that they do not need costumes, there is no need to memorize large texts (and those who play the role of a teacher can use a printout that can be attached to a magazine), they do not need to be rehearsed for a long time. Moreover, these scenes are close to students. They will be able to laugh at their mistakes by looking at themselves from the outside. Humor, jokes, funny scenes for children about school are well suited for KVN. Also see School Humor.
1. Scene "At the lessons of the Russian language"
Teacher: Let's hear how you learned your homework. Whoever goes to answer first will receive a point higher.
Disciple Ivanov (pulls out his hand and shouts): Mary Ivanna, I will be the first, give me three at once!
Teacher: Your composition about a dog, Petrov, is word for word similar to Ivanov's!
Disciple Petrov: Mary Ivanna, so Ivanov and I live in the same yard, and there we have one dog for all!
Teacher: You, Sidorov, have a wonderful composition, but why is it not finished?
Disciple Sidorov: Because dad was urgently called to work!
Teacher: Koshkin, admit who wrote the essay for you?
Disciple Koshkin: I don't know. I went to bed early.
Teacher: As for you, Klevtsov, let your grandfather come to me tomorrow!
Disciple Klevtsov: Grandpa? Maybe dad?
Teacher: No, grandfather. I want to show him what gross mistakes his son makes when he writes an essay for you.
Teacher: What kind of word "egg", Sinichkin?
Disciple Sinichkin: None.
Teacher: Why not?
Disciple Sinichkin: Because it is not known who will hatch out of him: a rooster or a chicken.
Teacher: Petushkov, define the gender of the words: "chair", "table", "sock", "stocking".
Pupil Petushkov: "Table", "chair" and "sock" are masculine, and "stocking" is feminine.
Teacher: Why?
Disciple Petushkov: Because only women wear stockings!
Teacher: Smirnov, go to the blackboard, write down and sort the sentence.
Pupil Smirnov goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates, and the student writes down: "Daddy went to the garage."
Teacher: Ready? We listen to you.
Disciple Smirnov: Dad is the subject, he left is the predicate, to the garage is ... an excuse.
Teacher: Who guys can come up with a proposal with homogeneous members?
Tyulkina's student pulls out her hand.
Teacher: Please, Tyulkina.
Pupil Tyulkina: There were no trees, no bushes, no grass in the forest.
Teacher: Sobakin, come up with a sentence with the number "three".
Disciple Sobakin: My mother works at a knitted fabric factory.
Teacher: Rubashkin, go to the blackboard, write down a sentence.
Pupil Rubashkin goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates: The guys were catching butterflies with nets.
Student Rubashkin writes: The guys were catching butterflies with glasses.
Teacher: Rubashkin, why are you so inattentive?
Disciple Rubashkin: Why?
Teacher: Where did you see the bespectacled butterflies?
Teacher: Meshkov, what part of speech is the word "dryish"?
Pupil Meshkov, getting up, is silent for a long time.
Teacher: Well, think, Meshkov, what question does this word answer?
Disciple Meshkov: What is it? Dryish!
Teacher: Antonyms are words that are opposite in meaning. For example, fat is thin, cry is laugh, day is night. Petushkov, now give me your example.
Disciple Petushkov: A cat is a dog.
Teacher: What does “cat-dog” have to do with it?
Disciple Petushkov: Well, how? They are opposite and often fight among themselves.
Teacher: Sidorov, why are you eating apples in class?
Disciple Sidorov: It's a pity to waste time at recess!
Teacher: Stop it now! By the way, why weren't you at school yesterday?
Disciple Sidorov: My older brother got sick.
Teacher: What do you have to do with it?
Disciple Sidorov: And I rode his bike!
Teacher: Sidorov! My patience has run out! Don't come to school tomorrow without your father!
Disciple Sidorov: And the day after tomorrow?
Teacher: Sushkina, come up with a proposal with an appeal.
Sushkin's student: Mary Ivanna, bell!
2. Scene "Correct answer"
Teacher: Petrov, how much will it be: four divided by two?
Disciple: And what to share, Mikhail Ivanovich?
Teacher: Well, let's say four apples.
Disciple: And between whom?
Teacher: Well, let it be between you and Sidorov.
Disciple: Then three for me and one for Sidorov.
Teacher: Why is that?
Disciple: Because Sidorov owes me one apple.
Teacher: Doesn't he owe you a plum?
Disciple: No, the plum should not.
Teacher: Well, how much will it be if four plums are divided by two?
Disciple: Four. And all to Sidorov.
Teacher: Why four?
Disciple: Because I don't like plums.
Teacher: Wrong again.
Disciple: How much is correct?
Teacher: But now I will put the correct answer in my diary!
(I. Butman)
3. Scene "Our cases"
Characters: teacher and student Petrov
Teacher: Petrov, go to the blackboard and write down a short story that I will dictate to you.
The student goes to the blackboard and prepares to write.
The teacher (dictates): “Dad and mom scolded Vova for bad behavior. Vova was guiltily silent, and then made a promise to improve. "
The student writes dictation on the blackboard.
Teacher: Great! Underline all nouns in your story.
The student underlines the words: "dad", "mom", "Vova", "behavior", "Vova", "promise".
Teacher: Ready? Determine which cases these nouns are in. Got it?
Disciple: Yes!
Teacher: Start!
Disciple: “Dad and Mom”. Who! What? Parents. Hence, the case is genitive.
Scolded whom, what? Vova. “Vova” is a name. Hence, the case is nominative.
Scolded for what? For bad behavior. Apparently he did something. This means that “behavior” has an instrumental case.
Vova was silent guiltily. This means that "Vova" has an accusative case here.
Well, and the “promise”, of course, is in the dative case, since Vova gave it!
That's all!
Teacher: Yes, the analysis turned out to be original! Take the diary, Petrov. I wonder what grade you would suggest to put yourself?
Disciple: Which one? Of course, the top five!
Teacher: Five, then? By the way, in what case did you name this word - “five”?
Disciple: Prepositional!
Teacher: Prepositional? Why then?
Disciple: Well, I suggested it myself!
(according to L. Kaminsky)
4. Scene "At the lessons of mathematics"
Characters: teacher and class students
Teacher: Petrov, you can hardly count to ten. I don’t know what you can become?
Disciple Petrov: Boxing judge, Mary Ivanna!
Teacher: Going to the board to solve the problem ... Trushkin.
Pupil Trushkin goes to the blackboard.
Teacher: Listen carefully to the condition of the problem. Dad bought 1 kilogram of sweets, and mom bought another 2 kilograms. How many...
Disciple Trushkin heads for the door.
Teacher: Trushkin, where are you going ?!
Disciple Trushkin: I ran home, there are candy!
Teacher: Petrov, bring your diary here. I'll put your yesterday's deuce in it.
Disciple Petrov: I don't have it.
Teacher: Where is he?
Disciple Petrov: And I gave it to Vitka - to scare my parents!
Teacher: Vasechkin, if you have ten rubles, and you ask your brother for another ten rubles, how much money will you have?
Disciple Vasechkin: Ten rubles.
Teacher: You just don't know mathematics!
Disciple Vasechkin: No, you don't know my brother!
Teacher: Sidorov, please answer, how much is three times seven?
Disciple Sidorov: Marya Ivanovna, I will answer your question only in the presence of my lawyer!
Teacher: Why, Ivanov, does your father always do your homework for you?
Disciple Ivanov: And mom has no free time!
Teacher: Now solve problem number 125 yourself.
The students get down to business.
Teacher: Smirnov! Why are you cheating from Terentyev?
Disciple Smirnov: No, Mary Ivanna, he writes it off from me, and I'm just checking to see if he did it right!
Teacher: Guys, who is Archimedes? Answer me, Shcherbinina.
Shcherbinina's student: This is a mathematical Greek.
5. Scene "At the lessons of natural history"
Characters: teacher and class students
Teacher: Who can name five wild animals?
Disciple Petrov pulls out his hand.
Teacher: Answer me, Petrov.
Disciple Petrov: Tiger, tigress and ... three tiger cubs.
Teacher: What are dense forests? Answer, Kosichkina!
Student Kosichkina: These are forests in which ... it's good to doze.
Teacher: Simakova, name the parts of the flower, please.
Disciple Simakova: Petals, stem, pot.
Teacher: Ivanov, tell us, please, what benefits do birds and animals bring to humans?
Disciple Ivanov: Birds peck mosquitoes, and cats catch mice for him.
Teacher: Petrov, what book have you read about famous travelers?
Pupil Petukhov: "The Traveling Frog"
Teacher: Who will answer, what is the difference between the sea and the river? Please, Mishkin.
Disciple Mishkin: The river has two banks, and the sea has one.
Student Zaitsev pulls out his hand.
Teacher: What do you want, Zaitsev? Do you want to ask something?
Disciple Zaitsev: Mary Ivanna, is it true that humans descended from a monkey?
Teacher: True.
Disciple Zaitsev: That's what I'm looking at: there are so few monkeys!
Teacher: Kozyavin, please answer, what is the lifespan of a mouse?
Disciple Kozyavin: Well, Mary Ivanna, it depends entirely on the cat.
Teacher: He will go to the blackboard ... Meshkov and tell us about the crocodile.
Pupil Meshkov (going to the board): The length of the crocodile from head to tail is five meters, and from tail to head is seven meters.
Teacher: Think what you are saying! Is it possible?
Disciple Meshkov: It happens! For example, Monday to Wednesday is two days, and Wednesday to Monday is five!
Teacher: Khomyakov, tell me, why do people need a nervous system?
Disciple Khomyakov: To be nervous.
Teacher: Why do you, Sinichkin, look at your watch every minute?
Disciple Sinichkin: Because I am terribly worried lest the call interrupt an amazingly interesting lesson.
Teacher: Guys, who will answer where the bird flies with a straw in its beak?
The student Belkov pulls his hand above everyone else.
Teacher: Try it, Belkov.
Disciple Belkov: To the cocktail bar, Mary Ivanna.
Teacher: Teplyakova, what teeth are the last to appear in a person?
Teplyakova's student: Plug-in, Mary Ivanna.
Teacher: Now I will ask you a very difficult question, for the correct answer I will immediately give an A with a plus. And the question is: "Why is European time ahead of American time?"
Student Klyushkin pulls out his hand.
Teacher: Answer, Klyushkin.
Disciple Klyushkin: Because America was discovered later!
6. Scene "Folder under the arm"
Vovka: Listen, I'll tell you a funny story. Yesterday I took the folder on the mouse and went to Uncle Yura, my mother told me.
Andrey: Ha ha ha! And it's really funny.
Vovka (surprised): What's so funny? I have not even begun to tell.
Andrey (laughing): The folder ... under the arm! Good idea. Yes, your folder won't fit under your arm, it's not a cat!
Vovka: Why "my folder"? The folder is daddy. You have forgotten how to speak correctly from laughter, or what?
Andrey: (winking and knocking himself on the forehead): Oh, I guessed it! Grandpa - under the arm! He himself speaks incorrectly, and also teaches. Now it's clear: dad's folder is your grandfather Kolya! In general, you thought of it great - funny and with a riddle!
Vova (offended): What does my grandfather Kolya have to do with it? I wanted to tell you something completely different. I didn't listen to the end, but you laugh, you interfere with speaking. Moreover, he dragged my grandfather under his arm, what a storyteller he found! I'd rather go home than talk to you.
Andrey (to himself, left alone): And why was he offended? Why tell funny stories if you can't laugh?
(I. Semerenko)
7. Scene "3 \u003d 7 and 2 \u003d 5"
Teacher: Well, Petrov? What am I to do with you?
Petrov: Why?
Teacher: All year you did nothing, did not teach anything. I just don't know what to put in the list.
Petrov (looking gloomily at the floor): I, Ivan Ivanovich, was engaged in scientific work.
Teacher: What are you? What is it?
Petrov: I decided that all our mathematics was wrong and ... I proved it!
Teacher: Well, how, Comrade Veliky Petrov, did you achieve this?
Petrov: Ah, what can I say, Ivan Ivanovich! It's not my fault that Pythagoras was wrong and this ... Archimedes!
Teacher: Archimedes?
Petrov: And he too, After all, they said that three is equal to only three.
Teacher: What else?
Petrov (solemnly): This is not true! I've proven that three is seven!
Teacher: How is it?
Petrov: Look, 15 -15 \u003d 0. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: 35 - 35 \u003d 0 - also true. Hence, 15-15 \u003d 35-35. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: We carry out the common factors: 3 (5-5) \u003d 7 (5-5). Right?
Teacher: Exactly.
Petrov: Hehe! (5-5) \u003d (5-5). This is also true!
Teacher: Yes.
Petrov: Then everything is upside down: 3 \u003d 7!
Teacher: Aha! So, Petrov, we survived.
Petrov: I didn't want to, Ivan Ivanovich. But against science ... you can't sin!
Teacher: I see. Look: 20-20 \u003d 0. Right?
Petrov: Exactly!
Teacher: 8-8 \u003d 0 - also true. Then 20-20 \u003d 8-8. It is truth too?
Petrov: Exactly, Ivan Ivanovich, exactly.
Teacher: We carry out the common factors: 5 (4-4) \u003d 2 (4-4). Right?
Petrov: Right!
Teacher: Then that's it, Petrov, I give you a "2"!
Petrov: For what, Ivan Ivanovich?
Teacher: Don't worry, Petrov, because if we divide both sides of the equality by (4-4), then 2 \u003d 5. Is that what you did?
Petrov: Well, let's say.
Teacher: So I put "2", does it matter. AND?
Petrov: No, it doesn't matter, Ivan Ivanovich, "5" is better.
Teacher: Perhaps it is better, Petrov, but until you prove it, you will have a two in a year, equal, in your opinion, to a five!
Guys, help Petrov.
(Newspaper "Primary School", "Mathematics", No. 24, 2002)
8. Scene "Schoolboy and Salesman"
Characters: schoolboy and shop assistant
Sales assistant: What can you tell you?
Schoolboy: The reign of Nicholas II?
Sales assistant: Not in the know.
Schoolboy: Okay ... Pythagorean Theorem?
Sales assistant:… (shrugs)
Schoolboy: Photosynthesis?
Sales assistant: (sighing) I don't know ...
Schoolboy: Well, what are you trying to do with your “What can I tell you?” !!!
(KVN team from Ryazan)
9. Scene "Schoolchildren at the stadium"
Characters: students and the stadium informant
A group of young fans, led by the leader, loudly chants:
"SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!" "SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!"
Suddenly, the voice of an informant in the stadium turns on:
Informant's voice: Attention of young fans! (young fans stop chanting)
Your history teacher is at the match!
Young fans start chanting:
"SPA-RTAC - ROMAN SLAVE!" "SPA-RTAC - ROMAN SLAVE!"
(KVN team from Ryazan)
10. Scene "Unnecessary words, or Cool Dnipro in cool weather"
Characters: a cultured adult and a modern schoolboy Vanya Sidorov
Hello, Vanya.
- Hello.
- Well, tell me, Vanya, how are you?
- Ou, deeds of power.
- I'm sorry, what?
- Cool, I say, schA one wick blasted this. Rolls to the shket. Give, he says, is great to drive. He sat down and scratched. And here is the teacher. And he lets show off. He opened his mitten. Yes, how he fights. Himself with a fingal. The teacher was almost crazy, but he was great. Into the rzhaka. Cool, right?
- Was there a horse?
- What horse?
- Well, that was laughing. Or I didn't understand anything.
- Well, did you understand anything?
- Come on, let's start over.
- Well, let's. So one wick ...
- Without a candle?
- No.
- And what is this wick?
- Well, one guy, a long one, drove up to the shket ...
- What did he ride on a bicycle?
- No, the school had a bicycle.
- Which shket?
- Well, one shibzdik. Yes, you know him, he walks around here with such a snobel.
- With whom, with whom?
- Yes, not with anyone, but with what, his nose is in the form of a schnobel. Well, give, he says, great to drive. He sat down and scratched.
- Did he itch something?
- No, he sawed.
- Well, how, sawed?
- What did you saw?
- Well, great?
- What?
- Well, this very, shnobel?
- No, the shnobel was at the school. And at the wick there was a fingal, he hit him in the head, and he began to wander around. He had opened his mitten, so he fidgeted.
- And why a mitten, he fidgeted in winter?
- Yes, there was no winter, there was a teacher.
- Teacher, you mean.
- Well, yes, with a black eye, that is, with a great, no, with coils. But the very same rolling that is great was dumbing.
- How did you go?
- And so, covered. Into small pieces. Do you understand now?
- Got it. I realized that you absolutely do not know Russian.
- I don’t know!
- Do you imagine if everyone spoke the way you do, what would happen?
- What?
- Do you remember, at Gogol's. “The Dnieper is wonderful in calm weather, when it freely and smoothly rushes through forests and mountains full of its waters, it neither stutters nor thunders. You look and do not know whether its majestic width goes or does not go” and further “A rare bird will fly to the middle of the Dnieper”.
- I remember.
- And now listen to how it sounds in your quirk language: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather, when, wandering around and showing off, sawing its cool waves through forests and mountains. Doesn't shout, does not cover itself. you don’t know whether he is sawing or not. A rare bird with a schnobel will reach the middle of the Dnieper. Do you like?
- I like it, - he said and ran, shouting: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather."
(Lyon Izmailov)
11. Young man in a nightclub
Characters: girl, young man, mother
A girl sits at the bar. A young man approaches her.
Young man: Hello baby! Are you bored?
GIRL: Yes, there is a little.
YOUNG MAN: Can you come with me? I will give you an unforgettable evening!
GIRL: Sounds. But my mother is waiting for me at 23-00 at home.
YOUNG MAN: Is mom waiting? Give it up! Are you 10 years old? Do you go on dates with your mom? Ha!
Suddenly, someone's hand confidently takes the young man's ear. Everyone can see that this is the hand of an aged woman.
YOUNG MAN: Mom? What are you doing here?
MOM: What are you doing here?
YOUNG MAN: Well, Mom! I AM…
MOM: I don’t want to hear it! March home!
YOUNG MAN: (to the girl) Baby, I'll call you back!
MOM: Home!
(KVN team from Ryazan)
12. Radiologist's office
Characters: grandmother, boy, radiologist
Radiologist's office: X-ray machine, table, chair. A doctor is sitting at the table.
A little boy and grandmother enter the office.
GRANDMA (pointing to the boy). I rummaged everything, there are no glasses anywhere. I think he swallowed them. All in your grandfather!
RAY-GENOLOGIST (to the boy). Have you swallowed grandma's glasses?
The boy doesn't answer.
GRANDMOTHER. Partisan! All in your grandfather!
RADIOLOGIST. Are you silent? But now we will enlighten you through and through and find out everything.
GRANDMA (joyfully). Yeah, got caught! To have such a thing at home.
X-RAY GENOLOGIST (examines the photograph). Well, well, well ... you know ... he has not only glasses here, but also a wallet with money. I can't say for sure, but somewhere around three hundred rubles.
GRANDMOTHER. It's not ours, we don't need someone else's. The main thing for me is to get glasses, I can't watch TV without them.
RADIOLOGIST. We'll get it now.
The radiologist approaches the boy, lifts him by the legs and shakes him. Glasses and wallet fall out onto the floor.
GRANDMA (grabs glasses). Thank you very much, doctor. I don't even know how to thank you. Let me kiss you!
X-RAY GENOLOGIST (turns the wallet in his hands). Do not. But the wallet, if possible, I will keep as a keepsake.
GRANDMOTHER. This is not ours, not ours, we do not need someone else's.
Grandmother and grandson leave the office.
X-RAYER (loudly). Following!
(A. Givargizov)
Characters:
Dad: Serpent Gorynych
Head teacher: Baba Yaga
Mathematics teacher: Leshy
Geography Teacher: Kikimora
Botany Trainer: Witch
Homeroom teacher: Water
SERPENT GORYNYCH (flies into the teacher's room):
... Yes, I told him a hundred times! ..
Well, what did he do again?
Leshy:
Multiplied minus with sine -
Got a minus one!
KIKIMORA:
Mixed up albinos
With albatrosses ...
WITCH:
Threw apricots ...
KIKIMORA:
Threw bubbles! ..
Leshy:
On a bet
Swallowed the call!
KIKIMORA:
Yawned the whole lesson
And he infected everyone with a yawn!
WATER:
But yesterday
Dragged into class
Hippo !!!
Leshy:
With this nasty boy
There is no sweetness!
BABA YAGA (oily):
Maybe give him poison? ..
Or thrown to the wolves?
AM -
And there is no bad student!
KIKIMORA:
Don't get excited, dear Yaga.
In our century
Such measures are outdated.
Leshy:
A hundred years ago
We would have it,
Sure,
Have eaten ...
But now
We have
Not too many students
In reserve...
WATER:
I agree!
We will not resort
To extreme measures.
WITCH:
Let's try to captivate him
A good example.
SERPENT GORYNYCH (confused):
Mmm ... Less, more ...
That is - more or less! ..
And yet...
WITCH (interrupts):
AND...
Understand!
Your example is not good ...
But boy
Doesn't want to study at all!
BABA YAGA:
Oh, how much trouble with children! ..
ZMEY GORYNYCH:
Lock him in the closet - let him teach lessons!
And if he doesn't stop yawning ...
ALL WELL:
We will turn it
Into chewing gum
And we will
SLOW
Chew!
(E. Lipatova)
14. Daily routine
Characters:
Schoolboy Vova
Schoolboy Petya
PETYA:
- Do you, Vova, know what a regime is?
VOVA:
- Sure! Mode ... Mode is where I want to, I jump there.
PETYA:
- Wrong! Regime is the daily routine. Are you doing it?
VOVA:
- I even exceed it.
PETYA:
- Like this?
VOVA:
- According to the schedule, I have to walk twice a day, and I walk four!
PETYA:
- No, you are not overfulfilling it, but breaking it! Do you know what your daily routine should be?
VOVA:
- I know! Climb. Charging. Washing. Bed cleaning. Breakfast. School. Lunch. Stroll. Prep. Stroll.
PETYA:
- Good.
VOVA:
- And it could be even better.
PETYA:
- How is it?
VOVA:
- Like this! Climb. Breakfast. Stroll. Lunch. Stroll. Lunch. Stroll. Tea. Stroll. Dinner. Stroll. Sleep.
PETYA:
- Oh no. With this regime, you will become a lazy and ignorant.
VOVA:
- Will not work.
PETYA:
- Why?
VOVA:
- Because with my grandmother we carry out the whole regime.
PETYA:
- How is it with your grandmother?
VOVA:
- And so. Half of it is done by me, and half by my grandmother. And together we get the whole regime.
PETYA:
- I do not understand!
VOVA:
- Very simple. I do the lift. Grandma is doing the exercises. Washing is grandma. Bed cleaning - grandma. Breakfast - me. The walk is me. Preparing lessons - me and my grandmother. The walk is me. Lunch - me.
PETYA:
- Aren't you ashamed? Now I understand why you are so undisciplined.
https: // site / smeshnye-scenki-dlya-detej /
15. About Pushkin
Two duelists stand opposite each other. One of them is Pushkin.
Second: Come on together!
Pushkin and his adversary raise their pistols. Suitable for barriers. Pushkin's opponent makes a shot. Pushkin is wounded. The enemy approaches the wounded Pushkin.
Pushkin: For what?
Pushkin's opponent: Bastard! Because of you, they left me for the second year in literature !!!
16. School riddles
Characters: Schoolboy, his friend - Vovka Sidorov
SCHOOLBOY (addressing confidentially to the audience, pointing to a friend standing nearby):
And Vovka Sidorov from our class is well, a slow-witted! Riddles here I came across interesting about school affairs, and the answers should be in rhyme. I, of course, guessed everything right away, and then decided to check Vovka for quick wits.
SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Here, guess the riddle in rhyme: "Between two calls, the term is called ..."
VOVKA SIDOROV (instantly):
Turn!
SCHOOLBOY:
Well, that's right, "change" is appropriate, but there must be a clue to the rhyme!
VOVKA SIDOROV (offended):
Yeah, he said it was right, and then you start ...
SCHOOLBOY:
Okay, let me give you another riddle, just think before you say the answer. "The sportsman told us: Everyone should go to the sports ..."
VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts out):
Score!
SCHOOLBOY:
Which store? What for? Where did you see him?
VOVKA SIDOROV:
What do you mean why? You need to buy new sneakers, otherwise my soles are already lagging behind on my left foot. And the Sporttovary store is right opposite the school. You saw him a hundred times too.
SCHOOLBOY (towards the hall):
Well, what can you prove to him here!
SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Can you rhyme this riddle? "Schools are not simple buildings, schools receive ..."
VOVKA SIDOROV:
On the head! Yesterday I almost did not touch the bow at Lenka Petrova's, and she banged me over the head with a book.
SCHOOLBOY:
Listen to one more riddle: "And today I got a grade again ..."
VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts):
I again got a C and C in mathematics.
SCHOOLBOY (addressing the audience in the hall):
Well Vovka and a slow-witted! Well slow-witted! Although ... I look, his face is sly, cunning. Maybe he was kidding me? Today is April 1st !!!
(Leonid Medvedev)
17. About parents
A man in a clothing store dials a number on his cell phone.
Man: Hello dear! ... Did our Bear do his homework? … Yes? How is he in his diary? Good, yes?! So, did he clean the room ?! Heck! Did you eat the soup ?! Nothing ... I just went to the store, and then the sale of belts!
