Live so to tell the truth. Why tell the truth is always better
I accidentally stumbled upon one article on the network. The article has a fairly large shelf life. You can even say that she is with a beard, but it was now that it is impossible for the way. I think this is because the topic is eternal - honesty.
Honesty and ... Personal branding. Previously, branding was mainly corporate. And now personal branding is sometimes much more important than the company's brand. How are personal branding and honesty related? Directly. Because when you build your brand, you can't be honest people And find yourself in your own trap. And in order to get out of there, you need to start talking to people again. But the truth is that people are not very like honesty. And this applies to both the business world and a personal environment. What happens if you, suddenly, begin to honestly answer questions and tell how you really are doing?
Which of friends is better: the one who will tell the truth, because his friend is not indifferent to him, or the one who will silence or affect that the choice of life / work companions / new home / tie is even nothing, just liked? As practice has shown, the one who gives out or spread with their hands. And the one who honestly answers the question, as a result, turns out to be an enemy.
The same applies to work. If you build your personal brand, then you must be successful: publish beautiful photos with beautiful and successful (and it is possible with those, and with those separately) people in beautiful places; give comments in fashion magazines; Periodically, to star in front of the cameras and cameras and please their admirers with photos in Instagram and Facebook. And no one is at all interesting to know, it is even harmful to know that you actually endure cannot be photographed, what have you already been tired of commenting, or what do you want to keep as far as possible from those with whom you constantly flash in the photos?
But you can't do this, because then you will lose respect for the public and our customers. You lose your own brand and, as a result, money. But for a long time it is also difficult to withstand, and sooner or later a man happens a nervous breakdown, because he constantly lies himself and others.
This is how to sign a contract with some company - you can not talk about it badly until you work with her. But as soon as the term of the contract end (or you will ruin it with all the ensuing consequences), you again become free and you can finally express your real feelings for the brand with whom we worked. But it is much more complicated to break the contract with himself.
What will happen if you suddenly begin to tell all the truth? And it will be very fun! Believe me, I know what I'm talking about;)
People will stop talking to you
If you started telling the truth, prepare for the fact that some people will stop talking with you. It can be members of your family, your friends, your colleagues and your investors. Get ready for the fact that your surroundings will change drastically and it applies to both real people and your "friends" in social networks.
When you tell the truth, it is difficult to offend someone. But it is also known that only those who are beneficial will be offended. If a person himself hurts with him, it is very difficult to offend. He can only cause a perplexity of his act.
People might think that you decided to reduce the scores with life
Imagine what will happen if you start writing your ribbon only the truth? Most likely, if the day was a heavy, each post would remind a suicide note or signs of manico-depressive psychosis will explicitly read.
People will start thinking that you are crazy
Reading your entries or communicating personally with you, many will begin to arise a completely natural question: "Did you go crazy?!" It is possible that they will start asking this question to your friends or close and interested in your general mental state. Someone may consider advise good psychoanalyst.
People will begin to frighten
People will start hanging on you labels. Someone will say that you are just trying to stand out among the crowd and be "not like everyone else" (urban crazy or crazy genius - who will be able to understand?). Someone will call an upset. Talking the truth - behavior is not entirely natural for modern Homo Sapiens, and no one loves when someone gets up at the corporate assembly and begins to tell the truth that not so. In general, few people love when they say the truth about knowingly unsuccessful things.
People will start finding you funny
After those surrounding accustomed to your statement, some will even find you fun and people will start slowly return to you. It will be interesting for them that this time will fill this crazy? And, most importantly, they will be confident in 100% of the truthfulness written or what you have said. You will be almost the only source of news "without censorship." You will become something like a series, from which it is difficult to tear off, only cooler.
After the stage of addiction and harness, people will begin to trust you. Because they will know exactly what you will tell them the truth, and do not drink beautiful stories on the ear in order to sell something. They may not love you, they may even fear you, but for the advice will come anyway. You can become something like the last instance, the king of Solomon in his settlement.
You will become free
And the last, the most pleasant stage - you will become free from your golden cells of your own brand and build a new brand that there will be no borders. If earlier, you did not say what you really liked or what you really thought about this or that reason because they were afraid to do not please or lose friends, now you can safely tell what you really think. Because there are people who like you like because of your personal preferences, and not because you agree with them only to please.
And you will definitely become easier, because now it will not be necessary to keep track of what you wrote, or for what you dressed, or for whom you now appear in photos. You are you. And next to you are those people who love you, appreciate you and trust you precisely because of this.
Do not confuse honesty with frank rudeness and rudeness. This freedom does not mean that you can speak to the right and left. This freedom means that now you can build your personal brand on trust, make yourself only better and learn to be responsible for what has been said.
There are often situations when you just need to tell a person the truth. At the same time, I really do not want to offend your colleague, a friend or acquaintance. Just another way it is difficult to convey to him a specific thought.
We will try to figure out how to tell the truth and not injure the interlocutor.
The truth is to speak easily and pleasant.
Yeshua Ga-Nochri. Master and Margarita.
Why and why do people cheat each other?
There are actually a few reasons:- A certain fear of the consequences of what was said, because it is not thoroughly known how a person will react to this or that statement.
- The unwillingness to hurt and force out the interlocutor due to the above.
So why not speak always only the truth or silence at all?
If the latter does not work, then tell me the truth correctly, without delivering pain to man.
How to tell the truth without wounding a person?
- Never do not worry that a little earlier had to lie. Yes, and admitted to this interlocutor not at all difficult, because you did it yourself. Of course, a person can be slightly dumbfounded by a similar truth, but after a few he will appreciate the courage of a deed. If the interlocutor asks about the reason for lies, then you can answer that you were afraid to offend, and the lie was a forced measure.
- There is one very useful psychological reception: during a conversation it is necessary to try call a person as often as possible by name. This method of communication will allow a little to get close to the interlocutor. Do not assure your eyes during a conversation, but do not stare for a person. Position choose this to be not directly opposite the interlocutor. Otherwise, an erroneous situation of confrontation may occur.
- If you need to say a person something obviously unpleasant, for example, to criticize his act or behavior, be sure start with something good. For example, if a colleague has not fully fulfilled to fulfill the task, it will not be superfluous to praise him first, but then express your opinion. For example, say so: "You, of course, a responsible worker and always handle your duties perfectly, but you can't cope with this task."
- In the case when a person is a very vulnerable person and can be very offended, standing before criticism to express approval actionsWhat will become an excellent "buffer" for.
Outcome
In their emotions, it is necessary to be honest and open. If some act of the interlocutor has severely angry you, then do not hide the feelings. In general, with close people it is desirable to say exactly in this direction.Try to notice more positive in a person than the negative. A person will make a criticism much easier if it sounds from the sentence of one who periodically praises and supports. Agree, if you say a person that he is an excellent friend and comrade, which can be rejected, but in this situation he did not quite rightly, then the perception will be completely different.
The main illnesses of our time are false and dildosity. From the point of view of psychology, a lie is a bad habit, a consequence of a bad character, poor upbringing. What is a spiritual look at this problem?
I think the main reason why people are lying are fear and insecurity. A person wants to seem better than he is, afraid to fail. If you add personal complexes, ambitions, envy, then the lies and pretense become both an instrument of achieving goals, and the lifestyle of such a person.
Of course, education, level of culture, manners, grafted by parents play an important role in this issue. It is from the family that we endure the fundamental concepts about life and the "matrix" of behavior. Unfortunately, recently parents have been trying to teach children with any way in any way. This is the so-called leadership psychology - if you are kind, honest and sentimental, then you will simply "eat" stronger. Life is regarded as competition, struggle, and virtuous character traits - as weakness. We are already reaping the bitter fruits of a similar approach to life - the lumenization of society, the inability to hear and understand the other, disunity and abnormality. As stated in the sacred Scripture: "Fathers ate sour grapes, and in children on the teeth, Oskomina" (Iz. 18: 2). Nothing amazing, because false priorities lead to false goals. Initially, the deception in this case is that this leader is not the one who knows how to manipulate people and get the benefits in everything, but the one who is able to sacrifice the sake of others.
I'm talking about this in order to be clear that a lie is not only a personal problem of a separate person, but this is what is able to globally affect the life of the whole society and even in all mankind. And with all the diverse types of human lies, the circumstances of the occurrence, it is obvious that its main reason lies exclusively in the spiritual area. It is no coincidence that the second name of the devil is a liar, the slander. Here is the original reason for the dark energy, which is connected by the slightest not true, any distortion of truth.
False is not just a sin. This is the main "component" of sin, this is the basis of any sinful action or thought. Probably, a person would never have sinned if they were not deceived by the promises of sin. As Saint Vasily is saying, "hell is impossible to make attractive, so the devil makes an attractive way there." Sin is always deceiving a man, and in each fall, it becomes the hostage to lies.
According to the teaching of Rev. Avva, Dofay, the lie is manifested by Trojako: the thought, word and life itself. If a lie is a thought in an unintentional substitution of himself with a genuine "role", in which a person would like to see himself, then a lie word is already a conscious distortion of reality. The concept of "Life Life" of Avva Dorofofa calls a deep sinful corruption of a person who is accustomed to the pork, is not afraid of him and is not shy. But since public opinion still condemns the vice, and it still appreciates virtue, then a person considers it profitable to hide under a virtuous mask. This lie lies in the cynical duality of life itself.
Avva Dorofey calls three reasons that encourage people to lie, which are also the basis of all sin. This is, firstly, consultation, that is, the desire to fulfill his desire; secondly, Srebrolubie is the desire to acquire material values; And, thirdly, the solidity, which, in the case of the inquars, was expressed in the reluctance to accept.
"False begging the lie to yourself: a person ceases to impede himself, admitted to himself honestly in the deed. This leads to a false confession and, as a result, to depression. How to start talking to the truth yourself? And what is fraught with self-deception?
Saint Feofan The rejupping teaches that "we must be able to separate yourself on yourself and the enemy that cries in me." The main trick of the devil is that he inspires a person, as if his thoughts and feelings are he himself. When we start to separate themselves from our own emotions, feelings and thoughts, they can no longer manage us.
Selfman is always associated with self-defining, confidence in the fact that anyone can be guilty in a particular problem, but not I myself. Care from problems in a similar way deprives a person the ability to solve them. Therefore, the Monk Paisius Svyatogorets said: "justifying himself, you seek you to build a wall separating you from God, and thus interrupt any connection with him." We need to learn to be responsible before God and people for their lives, deeds and thoughts. Do not hide your head in the sand, but to discover the heart to God, who, seeing the sincere aspiration of man, will always help and direct the true path.
The point of reference of the spiritual life of everyone is an honest look, addressed inside. Therefore, it is said by the Holy Fathers, that the first sign of recovery of the soul is the vision of their sins, countless, as the sand of the sea. As long as a person is not aware of the depth of his fall, he will not see his weave and his own forces will try to build his life - only disappointment and endless wandering awaits him. Passion blind us, manipulate consciousness. Therefore, to see the real picture of your position, you need to shift your own ego from the center of life and take a look at yourself from another angle. It is important, except for its shortcomings and spiritual diseases, see also someone who can heal. Only in the authorities of the Lord save us from ourselves, our own passions and sinful habits. Without God, an honest look at himself can end with despondency and despair. Spiritual diseases are cured by grace, which a person receives in the sacraments of the church, prayer and repentance.
The gospel gives us not only the truth about ourselves, but also hope for correction. At one spiritual writer, I met an interesting analogy. He compared the sinful drop of man with exercises on a trampoline: the lower the point of fall, the higher the person "rises" in repentance. Therefore, to know the truth about yourself, to honestly expose your drawbacks, to see them is not self-vacation or humiliation, but the only way out of the crisis of personality.
Tamed Natalia Goroshkov
